Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

To kick these people out?

999 replies

CompletePushover · 10/01/2014 18:24

7 yrs and this is my first AIBU, and I'm so cowardly I've name changed Grin

So... After years of renting crappy places dh, the 4dcs and I have finally bought a lovely house.

It's great. Needs loads of work doing on it. Lots of potential, completely neglected and now ours. The people who had it before us had some problems and had criminally neglected their animals. The house comes with a field.

Now begins the lovely story. A few years ago Some people passing by saw how neglected the horse in the field was and took it upon themselves to look after it. They did amazing things, built him a shelter, bought him food, trimmed his hooves, all of it.

The horse is a stallion and unbroken but of nice temperament. But it means he can be flighty.

Move on a year and one of the group has taken on most of the care and bought their own horse who now lives rent free in the field.

Two weeks before completion the owner tells us we will be inheriting a cat and that the horses are staying (he's gifted the stallion to the other horse owner)

So... We panicked until lovely horse person came to our door and seemed very nice, and we said they could stay until Easter and then we'd see (rent free).

This all seemed ok, but there have been annoyances: There's no where else to park but in our drive, when we want to wander around the field with the dcs we have to struggle through two horses and it's a nightmare, and now finally we have bought out longed for dog and I can't walk him on my field without someone with me because I can't carry a baby and a puppy and fend off the horses on my own, in December we were told they use one of our sheds for feed, And there are other people who are part of the group who have not introduced themselves to me, but who go on to my field regularly.

So this evening we've let the horse owner know that beyond the end of march we want our field back. At the moment I've used it twice since we moved in and I want to use it daily.

They're not happy. I tell a lie, one is not happy, the other is completely understanding.

I know they did a good thing, I know they put work into the field (shelter and fencing) but I also know they've had free pasture for 18 months in return, and I think it's become a picnic spot for them all.

AIBU? And should I be growing a backbone, because I'm already trying to think of a way to section off some of it, which I know would only end up delaying the inevitable? I'm also worried because I'm in no way insured to have this all going on on my property.

I want nice things for the people who have done good, but at the same time I want to enjoy my home. I also have PND and desperately want to be outside but can't cope with being around people. Just to throw that in there.

OP posts:
BadgersNadgers · 13/01/2014 21:28

Yeah Frankel they're criminals, lying is a vocation.

I'm very impressed you know Shergar's age.

thenightsky · 13/01/2014 21:34

Pixel I read that too.

Does anyone remember that thread in 'the tack room' threads about the lady that woke up one morning to find a stunning looking thoroughbred in her field with her daughter's pony?

It ran for many pages and was quite a soap opera.

FrankelInFoal · 13/01/2014 21:35

I work in Horseracing, it's kinda compulsory knowledge Wink

BadgersNadgers · 13/01/2014 21:45

Oh, that's cheating Grin

Don't they microchip horses like with dogs?

FrankelInFoal · 13/01/2014 21:51

Some horses are microchipped, it's only been compulsory in Thoroughbreds since 2000, I can't speak for other breed societies.

steppemum · 13/01/2014 22:00

I remember that thread, she put up an abandoned horse notice and after 2 weeks it was hers. She rode him and adopted him as far as I remember. (but she was a horsey person)

BadgersNadgers · 13/01/2014 22:02

Oh, too late for poor Shergar then.

Pixel · 13/01/2014 22:19

Sadly that story ended badly, despite the best efforts of the mumsnetter who had the horse dumped on her post of 15:06:51.

Pixel · 13/01/2014 22:20

Sorry post 7th Jan.

thenightsky · 13/01/2014 22:26

Oh pix... That made weepy reading Sad

clara26 · 13/01/2014 22:31

Hi op! I know nothing about horses but I wanted to say that I really hope you and your little family will be running around beautiful meadow soon! Good luck and stay strong

steppemum · 13/01/2014 22:46

Oh Pixel - I didn't know, that is really sad

CompletePushover · 14/01/2014 08:22

Jenny, photos is a good idea, I'll do that.

I hadn't even thought of Shergar Shock he does bare a remarkable resemblance now you say it!

Pixel that's a very sad tale. Poor lady :(

Thanks again for all your kind words. Nothing new to report really. I've had messages of support and advice from a few more people I contacted. They seem to be saying PTS isn't the cruel option if it's your only choice and that I'm not unreasonable.

OP posts:
cherrytree63 · 14/01/2014 09:14

Hi OP, if I was in your position I would contact the British Horse Society for advice from their legal team. You may have to take out membership, but that would give you 3rd party insurance anyway.

If it does come to having the stallion PTS your local hunt would be able to do it for around £300 which would include disposal, rather than pay vets fees plus disposal. The passport would need to be present, then sent back to the issuing body with the appropiate stamp.

CarriesPawnShop · 14/01/2014 10:00

OMG - you said the horse's age was approximate - it is Shergar Shock

WorkingItOutAsIGo · 14/01/2014 10:03

OP nothing to add but just huge respect for you and how you are handling this: so sorry you have had PND but the way you are gently asserting yourself now makes me think you are well on the mend and I hope the sunshine and meadow will be the final bit of your cure.

CompletePushover · 14/01/2014 10:24

Cherry tree that's really useful information. Thanks. The bhs have got back to me and have given me some legal bods to contact.

Carries, I've been told anywhere from 22 to 35 Shock

Workingitout, thank you. I have good days and bad days. I haven't lost my sense of humour, but I'm tired of feeling sad. You see, life is actually good now. I escaped my abusive XH, I met someone new and lovely, got married, the dcs adore him, we had a baby, moved to the house of our dreams (ok, it needed and still needs a lot of work, but all the potential is there), and I've just slipped over the edge.

My life is now lovely. I'm safe, the dcs are safe (although impending court battles don't help), this is such a stupid and pointless stress.

OP posts:
WorkingItOutAsIGo · 14/01/2014 11:25

Complete - gosh what a lot you have handled. Suspect you coped with all of that and only now that you are safe and happy and supported have you been able to let go and let some of the feeling out. Depression has been a way of giving you a quiet break and now you are ready to emerge with the spring (when it comes). Since you've handled all that these horses and their people will be a walk in the park - especially now that you have such brilliant advice and support from all the horsey Mumsnetters.

In order to ensure they dont give you any more stress I would definitely get your solicitors letter to them to say allowing the notice to run until the end of March is contingent on a list of conditions (no harrassment, no dogs, no parking etc - basically whatever you need to feel happy) and that if any of these are broken the notice period will switch to one week. That should help you feel better and free from bother. I'd even encourage you to shorten the notice in response to the treatment you have received and the information you now have. You are allowed to change your mind!

CompletePushover · 14/01/2014 12:10

Thanks Working. That is probably the case, I'm about to enter a big court battle with XH, so it's not as idyllic a time as it sounds. I really can't be wasting energy on other things :(

OP posts:
mistlethrush · 14/01/2014 12:34

Complete - I really like the 'these are the conditions or the notice period goes down to a week' option - there is no need for them to bring dogs onto your property. Can they get to the field without going through your garden? If so, can they remove things from the shed within the next two weeks (and store in the field shelter if necessary) so that you can have some privacy back?

CompletePushover · 14/01/2014 12:52

Mistle, I don't know. Sorry had some bad news this morning and it's just knocked me back. Stupid tears.

They've put a notice up saying they're being made homeless and can anyone help? Doesn't seem like they're actively looking, just like they're hoping some other mug will come forward.

I'm feeling very angry, but I've got my own battles to fight. Not this stupid horse thing :(

OP posts:
CompletePushover · 14/01/2014 12:56

Jesus, I've just reread it and it is actually requesting it for free!!!

There's not a hope. Right, I'm seeing my solicitor on another matter tomorrow, I'll ask her about it then too.

OP posts:
mistlethrush · 14/01/2014 13:01

Where have they put this message up - on the fence? I do hope that they are being slightly more proactive about finding something.

I can imagine that this is the last thing that you want to be fretting about and using what energy you do have on. I would, if you are up to it and can afford it, find a local solicitor and hand it over to them and ask them to notify the 'visitors' that they are not allowed their dogs on site for any of the period that they remain on site, and if they do that their notice will be shortened to a week. Similarly if there are any instances of them being aggressive towards you or any member of your family that their notice period will be dropped to a week.

What you really need is a friendly MNner who chances to live just up the road that can deal with this for you so that you can deal with all the other things that life is throwing at you at the moment.

CompletePushover · 14/01/2014 13:04

Mistle, online.

It's really upset me that there's no acknowledgement at all that we have let them stay. I'm probably just taking it personally, but we've not actually had a thank you. Let alone a freaking enormous bunch of flowers.

OP posts:
LessMissAbs · 14/01/2014 13:12

Where have they put the notice up? On your property? Because no-one else is that likely to see it there...

"Being made homeless" - is that actually how they described it? How pathetic. People lose their grazing all the time, livery yards close, you manage. Admittedly a 30 year old entire horse might be difficult to relocate, but it doesn't sound as though they have tried.

They sound very odd. Like a sort of local villagey against the incomer type, but I'd be surprised if they get much sympathy even in your village - they've probably had run ins with other people.

The sensible course of action on their part would be to discuss with you, the new owner, offer payment, and as you have said from the beginning, you would not have been averse to them fencing off part of the field, at least to give them some breathing space.

Nothing to cry about though, they are just odd people, trying it on.

Swipe left for the next trending thread