To kick these people out?

[CompletePushover]

7 yrs and this is my first AIBU, and I'm so cowardly I've name changed

So... After years of renting crappy places dh, the 4dcs and I have finally bought a lovely house.

It's great. Needs loads of work doing on it. Lots of potential, completely neglected and now ours. The people who had it before us had some problems and had criminally neglected their animals. The house comes with a field.

Now begins the lovely story. A few years ago Some people passing by saw how neglected the horse in the field was and took it upon themselves to look after it. They did amazing things, built him a shelter, bought him food, trimmed his hooves, all of it.

The horse is a stallion and unbroken but of nice temperament. But it means he can be flighty.

Move on a year and one of the group has taken on most of the care and bought their own horse who now lives rent free in the field.

Two weeks before completion the owner tells us we will be inheriting a cat and that the horses are staying (he's gifted the stallion to the other horse owner)

So... We panicked until lovely horse person came to our door and seemed very nice, and we said they could stay until Easter and then we'd see (rent free).

This all seemed ok, but there have been annoyances: There's no where else to park but in our drive, when we want to wander around the field with the dcs we have to struggle through two horses and it's a nightmare, and now finally we have bought out longed for dog and I can't walk him on my field without someone with me because I can't carry a baby and a puppy and fend off the horses on my own, in December we were told they use one of our sheds for feed, And there are other people who are part of the group who have not introduced themselves to me, but who go on to my field regularly.

So this evening we've let the horse owner know that beyond the end of march we want our field back. At the moment I've used it twice since we moved in and I want to use it daily.

They're not happy. I tell a lie, one is not happy, the other is completely understanding.

I know they did a good thing, I know they put work into the field (shelter and fencing) but I also know they've had free pasture for 18 months in return, and I think it's become a picnic spot for them all.

AIBU? And should I be growing a backbone, because I'm already trying to think of a way to section off some of it, which I know would only end up delaying the inevitable? I'm also worried because I'm in no way insured to have this all going on on my property.

I want nice things for the people who have done good, but at the same time I want to enjoy my home. I also have PND and desperately want to be outside but can't cope with being around people. Just to throw that in there.

Thanks everyone :)

We will put it in writing. Would an email be good enough? I only have an email address for them and given that I'm not sure how calm things will be from here on in, I don't know if I am up to handing it to her. Dh isn't usually back from work in time.

I'm still feeling guilty, but I know I shouldn't. I've inherited something that was a good deed to the old owners, but is now my good deed that is ruining my enjoyment of my property.

I do know for certain that if I could get outside every day and have a wander my mh would be so much better :(

Your solicitor can advise you on how to "serve" the letters correctly.

OP: Do not feel guilty if the horse gets put down.
All the real horsey people I know don't think twice about having a horse put down, though I know one who had a horse cremated, at great expense and ended up with an enormous box of ashes that took them two years to sprinkle round their land.

You and your health are far more important than the horse and the piss taking do gooders.
They are the sort of people who would find another rescue horse for your field if the stallion died.
They have given themselves a hobby at your expense.
There is only one person on here that disagrees with getting rid of it, maybe she would like to rehome him.

You are right that being outside will improve your MH.

Best wishes to you and your family.
Enjoy your outdoor life.

paxtecum that's really fucking insensitive!

I've just had my old boy PTS in the past month, he was in his early 30's, and was a rescue pony costing a fuck of a lot of money to keep comfortable when I could have saved loads of money by having him shot. It is also fucking hard for me and the mare he was companion to, and because her companion had gone I've had to move her to somewhere she does have company. I also still have all the boxes of ashes from our cremated cats because somehow we can't seem to bury or scatter them.

There are people who have horses purely for sport and have no issue with selling or shooting them if they aren't suitable anymore, but the majority of us love horses, and keep them as pets we can also ride but will be responsible for them because we love who they are, rather what they can do for us.

Joysmum, I agree with what you're saying, I think paxt's point is that there are plenty of people who wouldn't feel guilty in that situation, and that I should put myself first.

I wouldn't be happy with having a healthy animal PTS, that doesn't sit well with me. But nor am I happy with having the choice of endangering the dcs or not using my own land.

I do wonder at what point those caring for the stallion would consider him too expensive. I think they've been controlling arthritis and laminitis through diet. At some point he will get ill. Will they pay to treat him? I don't know. Under those circumstances I think it would be best to have him PTS.

They will find it hard to rehome a stallion but there are a few homes for old horses available. Its up to them if they want to do that.

2.5 months is fine, they can rent another field or loan out the other as a companion pony.

Just stick to your guns, be pleasant and ask what they will be doing with the shelter and cleaning up when they leave. That bears a cost too, for you if they just leave it all.

You probably should give them a formal letter- email them and give it over to them. Your solicitor should advise. Just say your dh and solicitor who handled the property sale say you should.

They are being very unreasonable tbh. I expect they can't afford to carry on but they must have known this would happen when you moved in, just a matter of time. Don't be drawn into problem solving, just be nice and firm.

Thanks Lavender. That's the thing, they must have known. The second horse was bought after the owners told them they were selling up. I understand that they wanted company for the stallion, but they must have had a plan for their own horse at the very least. I hope that is the case and that they weren't just hoping for the best and buying a horse without the means to support it independently.

I am a horse owner. A couple of months notice is fine and fair. It gives them time to seek out livery options locally and make arrangements for the stallion as they need to. He will be hard to place because a lot of liveries won't take stallions, and he is a bit old to move. But that is for them to sort out, they were very lucky to get a free field for so long, and had plenty of time to think about options, which they needed to do as soon as the place came up for sale. I guess you provide water as well... They'd have been out a lot more quickly if you had been a horse owner yourself, and wanted the field for yours!
Be prepared for them to take things they have put into the field, such as the shelter, but I'd be inclined to just let them get on with it. I'm not sure I'd carry on allowing parking in my driveway though, surely they can park in the road? If you get any aggro then tell them that unless it stops you will reduce the notice period.

Peeking, that's good advice. I'm expecting them to take the shelter. I've been a bit concerned about it anyway since there's been no planning permission for it. They also have a shed in the field that is theirs, but they had said they'd gifted that to someone else the first week we were here, but it still hasn't gone.

If it does become unpleasant I'm not subjecting me and the dcs to that, and I will have to insist they move sooner and potentially call in an animal rescue group. Either way I want to check out if the charities can help at all.

Contact BHS, Redwing Horse Sanctuary and World Horse Welfare for advice. I think due to the age of the stallion there is a good chance they may abandon him in your field. If that happens, his welfare becomes your responsibility as the landowner. I imagine due to his age and circumstances that he doesnt have a passport and the "gifting" didn't involve an paperwork. However it would still be a good idea to try and get the names and addresses of the people using your field if any civil action is required. Sadly, horse rescues are bursting at the seams at the moment.

Thanks perihelion. Unfortunately I think you could be right. I've got a feeling it'll go something like this

"We've tried everywhere and nobody will take him. So we'll have to leave him with you. I'm sure you don't want the work, so we'll kindly keep looking after him, and he'll need company, so since he's here we may as well keep 2nd horse here too."

I need to have something sorted if that is the case.

CP, I'm pleased that you seem to have strengthened from your first post - I think it always helps when the overwhelming majority of replies are reassuring you that you are not the one being unreasonable.

Bear in mind when you are checking out the charities that many of them say they are overstretched as a result of the economic climate and they may be unwilling to help, particularly as you are already accommodating the horse, albeit reluctantly, and that it isn't being neglected or in any danger.

I mentioned in an earlier post that it could be worthwhile contacting the relevant breed society - I am a member of a breed society where it is quite common for the jungle drums to sound in situations such as yours, or if a "known" horse suddenly turns up for sale in less than perfect circumstances, and within days somebody will at the very least have offered a foster home until a suitable home comes along. I really do think that this might be a more productive route - if not for you personally to take on, then suggest quite forcefully to your piss-takers that this is an option they should pursue - after all, if he does have amazing bloodlines, a stud may well be keen to have him.

Don't let them guilt trip you with the PTS option. I also balk at the idea of putting a healthy animal to sleep, but under the circumstances you describe, this is not a typical situation. What you are dealing with is not a bog standard horse - it is an entire male, with all his testosterone coursing through his body, who is ageing with health issues....(having laminitis managed at his age is probably a good indicator of Cushings disease). He will be difficult, if not impossible to re-home and could end up going through the wrong hands with all the misery that entails. His previous owners abdicated their responsibilities by gifting him without ensuring his ongoing welfare, and his giftee is, quite frankly, taking the piss out of you. All things considered, PTS may well be the kindest option for him. All you need to know is that no vet would destroy a life without good reason.

Take care, stay strong and most of all - enjoy your land when spring comes.

"We've tried everywhere and nobody will take him. So we'll have to leave him with you. I'm sure you don't want the work, so we'll kindly keep looking after him, and he'll need company, so since he's here we may as well keep 2nd horse here too."

"That won't work for me. Here are some numbers for horse sanctuaries, here is the number for the vet to PTS. Please have all of your property removed from my field by x. Thanks :)"

T3, excellent advice as ever, I'm not excellent at identifying horse breeds but I'll take a guess!

After all the volunteers' efforts I would very much become the evil new owner who came in and shot their horse if it came to that. It would make the small community thing very difficult.

Itsallgoing I will practise that speech. Promise!

Right, I have emailed all the relevant societies and charities including the breed specific one. Hopefully someone will be able to help and they won't all simply reply with a "he's too old to move, you keep him"

ItsAllGoingToBeFine"That won't work for me. Here are some numbers for horse sanctuaries, here is the number for the vet to PTS. Please have all of your property removed from my field by x. Thanks smile"

This. Their horse. Their responsibility.

OP - I'd lay money that they'd try that tactic to maintain th status quo. Itsall has the right idea. I would also start locking your gate so that they can't park so that they get the message that you're serious about evicting them.

I hope you are also going to get some professional advice about this OP.

I also live in an agricultural area, where lots of people keep horses (not posh liveries though), and while there are many good horse owners there are also others I have had experience of who will try and take the piss as much as possible.

I had one threaten to contaminate my land when she had to move her horses off the field that I had just become the new owner of, and make all sorts of unpleasant accusations besides. She then moved her horses to my neighbour's field, stopped paying rent, and it got very ugly indeed.

I would recommend you consult a local solicitor - they are likely to have relevant experience and it will probably save you money and stress in the long run.

Hopefully the people you are dealing with will be a bit more reasonable - but be prepared that they may not be.

Merguez, that's really horrible I don't believe it'll go down that route, It's far more likely to drag on as a "nowhere to go" issue. You're right, I really should get some proper legal advice on this one. I know there are all sorts of difficult scenarios and that squatters' rights exist for land too. Although I'm not sure where it lies with regard to a field that is also grazed by the owner (again, not personally), since they've only been the loan grazer since stallion was gifted IYSWIM.

Yetanother, I'm going to need to put a gate in before I lock it :) (on the drive not the land)

Renter you've cheered me up with your enigmatic "Victoria" post

And if nothing else I do know the guy with the land next door and he warned me to be careful (not specifically with regard to the people involved, just to make sure I secure my rights), so I know he'd stick up for me with other people.

I want a hooter honking air horn