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Original poster

To be miffed at "Gift list for mother of the baby" enclosed in *Baby naming ceremony* invitation?

992 replies

doubleshotespresso · 12/06/2013 23:38

So some close friends (who married in church), but now claim to be atheist are holding a naming ceremony for their 8 month old first baby in an hotel.....

The invitation is beautiful with a map, timings "event closes at 11pm"?

The gift list ranges from £30-to £300, all items for the mother, cosmetics, trinkets, jewellery, pampering breaks, personalised hand-bound stationery and photo albums...

Anybody know the drill for these naming ceremonies? Are we supposed to guess a gift for the baby? Or just congratulate the mother for deciding on a name?

I have read this a dozen times and am staggered beyond belief-DP read it and fell into hysterics....

My gut tells me to go along with Jo Malone scented nappies or something.

Somebody please tell me this is not normal?!?!?!

OP posts:
SpringtimeForHitler · 16/06/2013 16:08

I agree, DH should handle the sister I think.

You are lovely OP, she is very lucky to have a friend like you.
Brew Biscuit

LittleBearPad · 16/06/2013 16:42

Double thank goodness you did raise it with her. I'm so pleased people have been nice when they've replied to the notes and calls.

AndHarry · 16/06/2013 16:45

Hopefully the sister will be horrified to hear what has been happening and mortified that she suggested him.

pigletmania · 16/06/2013 17:37

The sister will have to lie it or lump it, it's not her day. She sounds like a bit of a celebrationzilla tbh Grin. Glad your friend as you to help her take control of the situation. You now need to help your friend become more assertive with her sister

BlackeyedSusan · 16/06/2013 17:47

coming back late for the updates. what a relief.

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 17/06/2013 00:45

Hello ithas been an epic day.

Yes, friends' DH called Australia, her sister has not responded well to the changes but will still be attending.....

Baby is very grouchy so need to keep this short for now.... Will update fully tomorrow , fortunately I am working from home tomorrow..... So get some extra sleep tonight thank goodness. I think we will be spending the day here just calming down, her DH was very good, he accepts that the situation was awful for her and has laughed with us all today and thanked us profusely too....

Will be back with more tomorrow......

OP posts:
amazingmumof6 · 17/06/2013 00:48

I think you deserve a good night's sleep!

well done!

MumnGran · 17/06/2013 00:55

...... and a double bouquet !!
Flowers Flowers

Thumbwitch · 17/06/2013 03:54

"her sister has not responded well..." well too fucking bad! She can have it the way she wants it when it's HER naming ceremony/whatever - and see how far she gets with a wishlist like that! I get the impression that the sister is rather too mememe about it all for comfort, still at least your friend's DH is doing the best for his wife, regardless.

foslady · 17/06/2013 09:46

Wasn't going to post anymore, but seriously, her sister has not responded well???? Sister needs to butt out! You are a fab friend. If I remember right and this sister has 'recommended' him, do you think she's worried about 'losing face',............or a discount on something he's doing for her.........???
And everything you are doing for her and the baby right now letting her sleep and getting back to being the person you knew -double bouquet and a bottle of champers to you!
I know you said that you were going to get this deleted, but please make sure we hear what a great day this family have at babies naming ceremony, it sounds like you are all going the extra mile to make sure is an extra special day for all the right reasons

MumnGran · 17/06/2013 09:48

How is it going this morning double? getting back to normal for you, I hope!
What a marathon

Snazzywaitingforsummer · 17/06/2013 09:53

Hey OP, so glad this had turned out well! I was the poster who had had a comparable situation go badly wrong with a friend. Very relieved yours has gone better as I wouldn't wish my experience on anyone - but it seems that your friend is a decent person who was misguided but willing to see it and sort it out. (By the way I know people in Australia who love entertaining and they would have no truck with this approach - I think the notion that it's a 'growing trend' is wishful thinking on the sister's part - they've probably persuaded one person to do it and are now saying it's a 'trend' Hmm ) Sounds like now it will be a lovely relaxed day.

On the 'deleting thread' point, my suggestion would be to ask for it to be moved to Chat. That way you could still update on how the rest of the re-organising goes, if you want, and the event itself, but the thread will go 90 days after the last post so it will die a natural death, as it were.

pigletmania · 17/06/2013 10:52

The sister sounds like a fecking nightmare, looks like she needs someone to keep her in check. It's nothing to do with her, it's not her babies among ceremony. When it's her turn she can have te day se wants not hijack her sisters day. Put her and Elton John wedding planner on an island together and leave them there

CSIJanner · 17/06/2013 11:06

The sister works in media - what's to bet that she was going to use her sisters naming ceremony as a client testimonial for her portfolio?

WaitingForPancakeDay · 17/06/2013 11:24

I am so pleased its worked out with you and your friend.

Is the event planner called Frank (pronounced Fronk) and featured in a film with Steve Martin and Diane Keaton?!

amazingmumof6 · 17/06/2013 11:27

Pancake yep, in Father of the Bride!

Snazzywaitingforsummer · 17/06/2013 12:12

CSIDanner That sounds pretty likely to me...

Northernlurker · 17/06/2013 12:38

This is a wonderful thread! What a lovely friend you are OP Smile

MerryMarigold · 17/06/2013 12:47

Just read all your posts, double shot. What a great thread! It's moved so far along. And to a happy ending. You are a great friend. Well done!

Fillyjonk75 · 17/06/2013 12:56

Just read through the whole thread, please post an update on the kicking the party planner gets before you delete, won't you?

Fantastic thread!

FairPhyllis · 17/06/2013 13:29

Good Lord. How come the sister has got such a power trip on her? What difference does it make to her what her sister does for her naming ceremony? Was the whole thing the sister's idea in the first place?

Lavenderhoney · 17/06/2013 15:40

Sounds like the sister was hoping for a currency holder to me:)

You really do sound lovely op:) Flowers

CalamityJ · 17/06/2013 16:24

Bloody hell! Proper cheeky! We've booked our DD's baptism and would be more than happy with no gifts as they're all a bit lame.

BatmanLovesAllan · 17/06/2013 16:28

Does the sister have the same initials as your friend? Grin

Well done, OP, for being such a good, practical friend.

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 17/06/2013 21:03

Thanks all- just come back with a bit of an update, it has been such a full-on day!

snazzy you were right to be cautious, but I just knew this wasnot the work of my friend. So far so good! Good point about moving the thread, not very up on these things thanks.

And to all of you asking questions regarding the sister, you better sit down for this.

Yes she works in media.
Yes she uses the planner in the UK frequently.
Yes she needs to realise this is not her party to enforce her ideas upon.
No- she has no children yet.
Yes she shares initials with my friend- that had not occured to me!
AND!!!!! Drum roll- we are reliably informed from the planner who finally called today she is due a fee for recommending him! WTA*?

I spoke to the planner on bealf of friend who locked herself in my bathroom and handed me her phone when he rang.... And there began the full-blown hissy fit....... Off the scale theatrics which culminated in " we need to skype immediately! Nobody cancels me! This is a crisis really Do you know how manypeople would kill to get their event with me?"

MN I think you would be proud of me.... I was firm, crystal clear and vocal in our exchange and made him wait for us to return his call for four ours while I prised friend out of the bathroom...

We skyped at about 4pm and I think the correct phrase would be he received "both barrels" from me. There will be no firther payment. We will seek the return of the deposit. The contract was not signed by my friend and some of the things he proceeded wth it transpires were never approved by her. He went ahead blindly (we think he assumed sister would veto all in arrogant error). I have made it clear he has ten working days to return the money (sizeable) and failure to do so will result in a legal summons. We have sent a recorded delivery document stating all the above, to his office and will see him in court if necessary. The hotel manager who was present at 2x meetings has agreed the items he pushed forward were never discussed and is willing to statement this if we need him to.

Then we had coffee with brandy- i was shaking inside with rage and needed to come down. Wanted to post earlier but family, after school, dinner stuff got in the way.....

More later.

I . Need. Wine !

OP posts:
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