Tell us about your worst wedding experiences?

[ENormaSnob]

Inspired by diamondsonthesoleofhershoes thread in aibu.

The worst wedding I have ever attended was an attempt at a big traditional wedding done on a tiny budget. Freezing cold room, luke warm daytime buffet with 2 choices served on paper plates that bent when the food hit them, no drinks at all, not even a toast after the speeches. There was a pay bar which is fine with me but not even one glass of wine with the meal seems mean. The night buffet was worse than the daytime one, a few plates of dry sarnies and 2 plates of mummified chicken. No pudding of any description throughout the whole day I was cold and hungry all day. The bride had told me before hand that most of their budget had gone on outfits for the wedding party and the cars. Cars which no one saw anyway On a positive note, the drinks weren't extortionate like they are in some places.

I am not a fussy cow btw, my ideal wedding as a guest would be a village hall type of affair with everyone bringing a plate and a bottle.

[TalHotBlond]

Boring weddings where nobody dances. Or smiles. As long as there is a bit of both I'm generally happy.

[Lawrene8]

My cousin's wedding was my worst. Wedding at 11am and no food til 4 when we received 3 tiny pieces of lamb and two individual mange tout. That was it there was no evening do and we all sat around with adults getting gradually more pissed. I was 16 and sat on table with the other kids- they were 3&4. Dad was so hungry we stopped at mcdonzlda drive thru. Totally unknown experience for us as dad had a thing about Macdonslds.

[TheHouseOnTheCorner]

I went to a very posh one held in the bride's home...it was a massive garden and they had a marquee and a hog rroast.

We all got nothing to eat after the cermony and had to wait about 6 hours for any food...we were all about to eat one another when they announced the food was ready but could we all wait for the tables at the front to get served first....there were LOADS of people and one hog!

I had a few bits of fat and some salad. They ran out of booze by about 9 and then buggered off to their honymoon. We legged it to the pub and feasted on seafood! I was cold and starving. People want food, warmth and drink....not fancy flowers and posh live music.

[Lottapianos]

My worst was probably when my BF married a total tosser. I felt gutted throughout the ceremony but of course did best-foot-forward and happy-smiles all day for her sake. It was quite a nice day actually but in my head I was yelling 'what the hell are you DOING girl????' all day. They're still together, she's pg and he's even more of a tosser now

[fluffiphlox]

When I was single I went to a wedding where my friend was marrying a 'foreigner' (don't want to say what nationality as it may out me/them) where the ceremony was run in two languages (fair enough), but of course it wa twice as long as normal. We all went to the hall where the 'do' was. No sign of the wedding party for between two and three hours. Nothing to drink. (Couldn't even buy a drink, let alone sip free fizz/sherry/Pimms). Eventually the wedding party turns up, having had their photos done. Followed by meagre meal, not much to drink. I didn't hang around for the barn dance.
Moral: don't keep your guests hanging around and make sure they have access to a drink (doesn't have to be free or alcoholic but nice if it is).

[worldgonecrazy]

I went to one where the celebrant hadn't got a clue what she was doing, kept mumbling, repeating herself and saying random phrases like "by the power vested in me" whilst waving a knife around in random patterns in the air. She charged £150 for herself and £100 for the 'privilege' of her daughter attending with her and standing around looking miserable and not saying a word. The guests were all completely confused as to what was happening, and then it rained so we had to huddle under a small gazebo and eat dried out sandwiches.

I could have cried for the bride who had been really looking forward to a very special occasion.

[Want2bSupermum]

I just attended my sisters wedding. I was the chief bridesmaid..... This isn't something I will ever be able to tell her but I hated her wedding. My BIL is lebanese and very showy. This is the opposite to me and my family. His father died when he was young and he has supported his family for the past 20 years. This is admirable and it was obvious that my sister wanted the wedding to be about him.

My Dad paid for the wedding and was happy to do so and also gave them money to help with the purchase of their first home. I don't know exactly how much he gave them but it was in the range of $100K or so. Regardless of the amount it was shocking to DH and I that he wasn't thanked. Worse was the next morning when the sister of my BIL told my Dad that there were more Lebanese in attendance compared to my sisters family.

I found it shocking that they spent $1000 on a cake yet they didn't have transportation from the church (sorry cathedral) to the venue. Before the wedding my sister told me that she had organized a babysitter for the children. It didn't happen because my sister forgot to confirm with the girl! The music was lebanese music for most of the night (reception was from 5-10pm which meant they started kicking us out at 9pm) which I have no desire to listen to. I was able to get one glass of wine with dinner which consisted of a bowl of lettuce with coutons and salmon with two carrots and a potato. I never got a slice of wedding cake which was served as desert. I am fine with in principle but it was a joke that I didn't get a slice as they went home with two tiers of sponge cake that was thrown out by BIL the next morning. WHO THROWS OUT GOOD CAKE!

[HateBeingCantDoUpMyJeans]

The worst wedding was one where the vicar got the grooms name wrong, everytime he said it

[redrubyshoes]

I once went to a work colleague's wedding that still makes me cringe. There were about 150 people invited to the reception and about enough food for 12 people.

The bride and groom sang 'Like a Bat Outta Hell' by Meatloaf on the karoke.

Bride tried to force cajole guests into dancing the conga.

Bride burst into tears and got as mad as a cut snake when a colleague who had been on mat leave turned up with new baby. We all popped over to say hello and greet little one. It ruined her (the bride's) day and colleague was 'being a bitch and just wanted all the attention' ...... erm you invited her!

I went home at 9.30pm and stopped off for a Chinese as I was so hungry.

[Want2bSupermum]

Oh and I forgot to mention that the priest who married my sister gave a sermon telling my sister that she must always respect her DH's wishes.... I was ready to throw up. My brother said I was twitching a lot during the sermon and he was worried that I was going to stand up and give the guy a piece of my mind! There was nothing about him respecting or supporting her. There was also the kicker that my sister converted to catholicism. I could tell my parents were dissappointed that she didn't tell them before the wedding day and passed it off as nothing.

[Nancy66]

Went to a wedding where the bride's father was dead so the groom's father made a speech instead.

He got a little carried away in saying how good looking and sexy the bride was and ended up raising a glass to his new daughter-in-law and saying 'and if you fancy making an old man very happy I'm in room 318.'

.....you could hear a pin drop.

[CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger]

Was invited to an evening do in the middle of nowhere, forked out for a room at the pricey hotel it was being held at (nowhere else local), there was not one morsel of food on offer, and the music, including the first dance, was on a stereo on the minuscule dancefloor - it was just terrible.

[FrillyMilly]

I dont think I've been to a bad wedding but I've been to some that are soulless and boring. They occur in a stately home or really expensive hotel. No one can afford to have a good drink because it costs £15 a drink and the buffet is always so sparse and mainly salad. Oh and you wait 3 hours after the ceremony whilst they get an array of posed but trying not to look posed photos.

All the great weddings I've been to have been at 'cheap' venues but everyone has had a brilliant time. Ones where the bride and groom have what they want rather than a bog standard wedding. I went to one with a fish and chip van instead of a Buffett. And one that had a lovely dessert table at the end of the meal that you could help yourself to.

[whackamole]

I am really worried now!

I get married in June, our ceremony is at 1.45pm and we have arranged for dinner to start at about 4pm, to allow for photos and getting to and from the registry office to the hotel. We are providing dinner and drinks for all, so hopefully they won't be too miffed at having to stand around for photos!

(I also have cake which will be thrown out over my dead body)

[Ragwort]

I agree that the more 'expensive' and 'exclusive' the venue is (or trying to be) the less 'fun' the wedding is.

I really wish people would spend less time/effort/money on their wedding day and focus on their marriage instead .

[blackteaplease]

Whackamole, you will be fine. People will most likely grab some food before a 1.45 wedding.

I have learnt my lesson now and usualy take a cereal bar/ banana for emergency eating!

[piprabbit]

A 1:45pm ceremony and 4pm meal is fine, especially if you are having drinks on arrival at the reception and have mentioned timings on the invites so people can grab a light lunch before the ceremony if they want.

I hope you have a wonderful day whackamole.

[leguminous]

Well, the one I've enjoyed least was the one I attended just after finding out a friend had passed away, but that wasn't exactly the bride and groom's fault!

I haven't got any really awful stories, just lots of memories of tottering round in smart shoes for a bit too long before the food was ready, with nowhere to sit other than on damp grass. I'd always rather be comfortable than be impressed by a super fancy venue! Ours was very small, registry office then reception in a nearby relative's (very nice!) garden, with all the chairs we could muster for those who wanted them. My mum made tons of yummy food, my dad made the beer, and the other drinks were provided by Majestic. Then we went off to a local pub in the evening and ordered loads of bowls of chips for everyone. Some friends of ours had a hog roast, which was spectacular and so totally them - and everyone got plenty to eat. I want a celebration to be a celebration for everyone there, not some kind of ordeal, or what's the point of spending all that blimming money?

[ENormaSnob]

whackamole, as long as guests are warm and fed and there are drinks and cake then you should be ok

[leguminous]

Whackamole, you'll be grand, there's plenty of time before the wedding starts for people to grab a bite if they want to. It's just weddings that start at 12 on the dot and then want you to hang around for six more hours before getting anything to eat.

[localcrackpot]

I've never been to a bad wedding. Once went to one in an incredible venue where only canapés were served, as the meal. No chairs apart from a few arranged with their backs to a table. In fairness there were plenty of canapés and I doubt anyone was hungry but it was a weird combination, especially as there'd been a long wait in a corridor while they had photos taken. Mind you, I bet that bit was boring at our wedding, but as the reception was in a massive hotel you could find a random chair or pootle of for a brew or a glass of something if the welcome drinks didn't float your boat.

I'm not calling that other wedding btw- I heard some sniffy comments but I understand they had good reasons which were based on kindness to family rather than financial prioritising.

[whackamole]

Phew, thanks all for the reassurance!

They're all going to be pissed by the time we show up for the dinner aren't they?

[piprabbit]

Probably , especially if they grab lunched in a pub!

[kdiddy]

I have 2, although both were funny in their own way. The first was a reception after the couple had got married abroad - fair enough. Looked like a really lovely buffet until we realised that it was the same 4 dishes repeated all down the table. Fine if you like chicken nuggets and chips - DH got food poisoning. The bride quite clearly disliked the groom's friends - which was us - and very pointedly walked straight past our table when doing the rounds thanking everyone for coming. In fact she didn't say a word to us all night. The kicker was when my friend overheard her father, in the toilets, saying "how much longer do I have to talk to these fucking people?" never felt so unwelcome - we felt like gatecrashers not invited guests. However we were in a group, found it funny, and had a right laugh. Nobody has heard from bride or groom again!

Second was an ok wedding but hideous best man speech which basically gave a day by day rundown of the stag, therefore being of interest to about ten people. Worst bit was when the best man essentially revealed that the groom's 16 year old brother had slept with a prostitute on the stag weekend. I don't know who looked more embarrassed, the brother or his mum (who he was sat next to). Stags found it hilarious. Nobody else did.

[DontmindifIdo]

whackamole do you have any canapes or at least nibbles? Is your venue the middle of nowhere? (meaning that it will take more than an hour to get to for the majority of guests, people might not be able to eat before hand if so) Are you expecting people to spend from 2:15-2:30ish until 4pm outside?

Food, warmth, booze.