Why the Friggity Frig <GLARES> didn't anyone, not one of you, think

[Honeydragon]

to tell me what a piece of piss Chicken and Sweetcorn soup is to make! It takes 5 minutes and costs fuck all. I have being buying this stuff you know? With ACTUAL money.

One idle google and 10 minutes later dd and I have a pan full for lunch, it's lovely.

It was bad enough finding out about cleaning washing machines, and Veet to unclog hairy plug holes.... and now you failed to tell me this

Well you horrible lot, what else have you being holding out on, and keeping from me?????

Yes yes yes I did the oven door thing today and it worked a treat PLUS I used the funny middle bit of the stainless steel sink to make the dishwasher tablet solution so that left the sink all sparkly and lovely AND then I put the dishcloth in an otherwise empty machine on 90 because I was scared of drowning in bubbles.

Save myself???????? When I was small and new and found this strange new land of cunting Sainsburys and sweetcorn rivers YOU, yes YOU Never, were there when I found out what SpaceDocking was! I have never been the same since. . I certainly scream in my sleep more.

you only have yourself to blame. you think i google that shit? no siree. i learnt my lesson.

I never Google anything. I'm not sure of.

I can't get the banana thing to work

And I want my oven cleaned for £30! Stump up the goods!

Have only got as far as page two before saying accidently outloud, "Ooo, I'm going to have fun with my banana tomorrow!" Cue very looks from DH next to me, merrily minding his own business and now pondering my meaning!!

Brilliant thread !

Dh just told me another little banana 'tip'.

Take a needle and gently press into banana and turn. Repeat all around banana as evenly as possible.

Open banana, bitesize pieces !

I have not tried this so I don't know if it works. Will be buying bananas tomorrow to test both banana theories.

Vivi - why was the charcoal in the installation art in the alcohol mince rinsing auxiliary fridge on kitchen roll, but the drippy sticky sliced old lemon wasn't?
Am I a cultural philistine because I have to ask?
I watched Swan Lake earlier, by the Royal Ballet at Covent Garden until it was time for Big Fat Gyspsy Wedding, then I changed channels

I'm creasing up with some of the typos and auto corrects gone wrong on this thread. I also have mental images of what a 'big fat worm of lard' looks like.

But I've forgotten what dragon butter is and I'm going to keep it that way.

WE MADE CLASSICS! Yip yip!

I have some questions.

Just how rank is dragon butter? Is it a poo related? Blood? Other bodily excretion? Because I think I could cope with any of that. What I can't cope with is creatures. I still get prickly sweats when I think about those nipple grubs from the Cuntworms thread (love how autocorrect capitalises cw) Would someone please give me some sort of euphemistic summary as to the nature of DB? Save me from myself and my itchy google finger.

Also, can anyone vouch for the DW tablet in with yellowed whites? That's got potential warranty claim written all over it, surely. And I'm rocking a Beko, none of your throw-anything-at-me-Miele, so I'm not brimming with off-piste washing machine confidence...

Finally, I think I missed the bit about the washing machine drawers. So I'm demoulding the top drawer and defluffing the secret bottom drawer? And what's the fire all about? I was too busy setting light to my fridge when that was being discussed. And are we bothering with soda crystals on the maintenance wash? Perhaps someone would be so kind as to compile a little washing machine spring-clean best bits please?

TIA, wise ones :)

Vivipru, dragon butter is rank, no creatures involved but still rank

Moulds washing machine drawer is a fucking nightmare to actually get out and I had to kick mine to get it back in. Was it worth the effort? Well I have a clean detergent drawer that no one ever sees but me so I suppose that's good?
Secret fluff trap in tumble drier MAY catch fire if you don't clean it, I can't find mine didnt look to hard and I'm working on the theory if it does catch fire then I will find where it is :)
Don't know jack about soda crystal, did maintainance was without, kitchen stank of dirty water (10 years worth) so maybe should have.

I think I deserve one of your non smelly ciders for that!

Right, please tell me again what to do with the banana?! I tried it yesterday and just ended up with a banana I had to open by the stalk end and the other end all squishy where I'd squeezed it What am I doing wrong?!

Ah thanks tantrums that's great :)

Ciders have all been mullered but I might be able to find a little for you

Is it bad that I've shoved the kid under the mobile and wound it as far as it will go so I can catch up on this thread in peace?

Yes somers you should have put it in hibernation mode in the fridge!

Latsia - is there a picture of a s.p.i.d.e.r in the link?

I am doing the machine machine maintenance wash now, for the first time ever! hoping for sparkly clean machine afterwards

Washing machine!!!

This e-cloth must be what MIL brought round. She arrived one day and shoved something in my hand, said "here, I've brought you a dishcloth" and hurried into the house leaving me standing at the door, holding a weird horrid cloth, somewhat confused. It does feel like it's snagging dry skin on your hands, doesn't it?

Wm is on maintenance wash now. A few suds, nothing crazy though. It's a little disappointing to be honest.

The e cloth is really disgusting, I don't understand why it exists?
Why have a cloth that no one wants to touch?

Maybe the concept is you buy one and it lasts for life because you cannot bear to pick it up and touch so they simply lurk at the back of the cupboard and make you feel bad for using kitchen roll instead?

I did the washing machine maintenance last night. Was slightly disappointed with the lack of bubbles but after doing a load of washing this morning I can't believe how lovely it smells! that I didn't notice before now that they didn't come out smelling as fresh as I would like, but when I took them out of the machine it was like spring in my kitchen
Now, please may I have tips on my oven. No dishwasher here so can't use DW tablets (and I want to do it this afternoon but can't get to shops) so what can I use?

I love this thread

I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong, but dragon butter is connected to gay sex, in particular semen mixed with poo. What one does with dragon butter I daren't think about!

I tried the banana-opening with DS2's banana this morning. Only result was a squished end which I then had to cut off after opening the traditional way. :(

Oh Lacka... I am holding you solely responsible for lowering the tone of the whole thread!