to get disproportionately angry when songs do not make sense

[WTAF]

In the car today, radio on, and they start playing All Around The World by Lisa Stansfield. Instantly I felt the rage creeping up.

'Been around the world and I, I
I can't find my baby,
I don't know why, why he's gone away '

YES YOU FUCKING DO, LISA! Allow me to refer you to your own words, not 30 seconds ago, when you said (and I quote):

'We had a quarrel, and I let myself go
I said so many things, things he didn't know
And I was oh, oh so bad'

And then, and then, LISA, you go on to say

'I did too much lying, wasted too much time'

So you do know, you know exactly why he's gone away, so you should just STFU and concentrate on finding him to apologise. Not singing that bullshit trying to make us feel sorry for you, when clearly it is all YOUR FAULT.

I feel better for that. Anyone else?

Ooo it's making me want to play my old vinyl now except we don't have a record player anymore. Apart from the one in the loft, hidden under all the
crap carefully boxed things which may come into use one day.

Right George, so let's get this straight.

'Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away'

However, sometime in the intervening year, you seem to have got your heart back again, or grown a new one, since

'this year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special'

I think George is recycling his Xmas presents.

For SaturdayNightBeaver

chestnuts absolutely. It's got to be one of the most insulting songs ever written.

Belfast I always heard it as "young girl with eyes like potatoes" ...

Surely it should be the subjunctive and "I wish I were a punk rocker with flowers in my hair"?

May I offer you "From my hands I know you'll never be, more than twist in my sobriety." And the whole lot of the song is crap - I was asked to translate it into German when it first came out. I couldn't, I just couldn't. (I did manage to translate "On Ilkley Moor bart 'at" into Romanian though. The high point of my career, I think.)

And yes, to "Young girls with eyes like potatoes."

'Waaaaaooooooooo'

'Your sex is on fire'

???????????????????????

What? Why? How?

The rest of the song makes about as much sense as that does!

I really hate that song - and not just because of the stupid lyrics.

Has anyone seen the Michael Macintyre sketch about sex is on fire? It's hysterical!

I tell the kids it's "your SAX is on fire" and it's about someone whose musical instrument bursts into flames.

Yeah, CalamityKate, I know that's what he meant, it's just such a cringe-inducing line, don't you think? It's self-referential and not in a good way.

Think someone mentioned the first line 'There she was just a walkin down the street singin do wah diddy diddy dum diddy doo'

..which is reason enough to call the police I suspect. But then we also find out that she is
'Snapping her fingers and shuffling her feet' which adds to the image that in fact, she may be one of the Walking Dead. In which case...

'She looked good(looked good), She looked fine(looked fine)'. No Manfred Mann she probably did not.

'She looked good, she looked fine, And I nearly lost my mind'

Ah. You said it, pal.

Oasis have much to be ashamed of. Namely 'She's Electric' which boasts the shamelessly crap 'She's got a sister, And god only knows how I've missed her
On the palm of her hand is a blister' which may have a sexual subtext but reads more like they just couldn't be arsed.

I've just been informed that the words to the Alanis Morrisette song, Ironic. Are in fact

Its a death row pardon two minutes too late

not as I have always thought (and makes SO much more sense)

Its a death row hard on two minutes too late

"I took her to a supermarket/ I don't know why but I had to start it somewhere/So it started - there."

Start WHAT, Jarv? You go to the supermarket and rant loads, that's literally it. There is nothing to "start".

TOTALLY agree re: rude Ronan. You say it best when you sing nothing at all, matey.

He had to start her life with the eponymous common people, Elephants. She said "I want to live like common people" and now he's starting that life.

What does 'chasing pavements' mean anyway?

I thought Jarvis meant he was starting his relationship with the Greek girl in the supermarket. 'I had to start our relationship there'.

other way round I think!

"Everybody needs a bossom for a pillow" - No thank you Cornershop, I'll stick to my nice feather one and do without the nipple in the ear.

It's one of my favourite songs but- "Up the junction' by Squeeze....

'this morning at 4.50
i took her rather nifty
down to an incubator
where (?) minutes later
she gave birth to a daughter...

The 'incubator' was surely only put in there to rhyme with later as nothing rhymes with hospital!!!

@Hecate- Ceelo Green is actually F**k you! not Forget you!, which makes a bit more sense if directed at the girlfriend stealing man!