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Original poster

Weird things your teachers did, which they would be fired for today.....

499 replies

muriel76 · 27/09/2011 19:15

Bit of a random question, but I was chatting with an old school friend the other day and we were remembering our teacher at primary school having a new bathroom fitted and she wanted to check how the workmen were doing.

The whole class was told to 'line up at the door' and off we marched down the road to her house, with teacher leading the way (small town BTW she lived near the school!) but no other adults in sight.

We then all sat in her back garden while she chatted to the plumber!

Ok this was back in the 80s but it made me think - you would never get away with this today.

Anyone else got a similar story from before the days of the national curriculum and parental consent forms etc?!

OP posts:
jimswifein1964 · 27/09/2011 20:27

Primary - teacher made us rip up all our years work on the last day of term, so we couldnt pass it on to be copied Sad

Primary - like someone else posted, I was ashtray cleaning monitor at playtime Hmm

Secondary - very nasty pe teacher who used to announce to everyone if she caught you in the shower tying ti keep your knickers on, and made you retake the shower with the class watching

youarekidding · 27/09/2011 20:28

My year 5/6 teacher used to jump on his desk and pretend to surf to gt our attention.

H&S would ban that now. Grin

We were discussing this at work the other day. Older collegues had stories about teachers throwing things at them!, not allowed by the time I started school but I did point out that the old writing name on board and missing play isn't even allowed nowadays.

ElderberrySyrup · 27/09/2011 20:31

I was sent to go and read to the headmaster when I was 5 or 6 (because I was good at reading) and I had to sit on his lap.
I don't remember him doing anything dodgy but somehow the whole thing was indescribably revolting. Maybe there was something going on I wasn't aware of and I had a sixth sense about it, I don't know. Why would I have been this freaked about it if there wasn't anything wrong? Confused

BelleEnd · 27/09/2011 20:32

Sexual relations between teachers and 6th form girls was practically compulsary when I was doing my A-levels 10 years ago. We used to go out drinking together all the time, without ever hiding it. And we had a biology teacher who was a total perve- All the girls hoiked up their skirt and unbuttoned their blouses before the lesson, and he's forget to do any work and just flirt...

TheThingUpstairs · 27/09/2011 20:33

Mrs J at primary school would threaten to "shake you until your teeth rattle" if you had been naughty and then do so.
Another teacher didn't actually notice that I didn't return to class after lunch break (also in primary school).
They also did not stop my sister from running out of school, she managed to get to where my mum worked and school were not sure where she(my sister) was...

AndiMac · 27/09/2011 20:34

Socialbutterfly, I love the free rides on the mobility scooter! That one is my favourite of the nice ones so far.

Some of the nasty ones really are scary nasty.

cece · 27/09/2011 20:43

I used to be the teacher's dinner monitor. I highly coveted job. It involved:

-going into the canteen kitchen and collecting the teacher's hot dinners.
-carrying the steaming hot food on a tray across the playground and up a very narrow and steep staircase to the staffroom.
-negotiating the smoke filled staffroom to deliver the staff their lunch and then after a period of time go back and take dirty plates etc back to the kitchen to be washed up..

If you were really luckly one of the teachers would give you some money to go up the road to buy a pack of fags!

wonkylegs · 27/09/2011 20:50

Small village primary 2 classes headteacher taught everything in reference to bible stories.... Even maths and PE Hmm
Learning to swim he would chuck kids in the pool 'trust in god, it'll be fine' as we coughed and spluttered and occasionally had to be fished out.
In most subjects he routinely shouted at and humiliated small kids, occasionally taking more physical tactics.

toddlerama · 27/09/2011 20:53

My reception teacher would put us in the cupboard if we were 'naughty'.

If anyone was unfortunate enough to wet their pants, they were provided with red, woolly tights of shame so that everyone would know.

We had a tiny, tiny teacher in yr 3 who was mad as a hatter. She regularly wore a school uniform because she could.

My teacher in yr 7 (still middle school in my county) used to throw chalk, fire a staple gun and slam a metre stick on the table to get attention. All of our names were written down the side of the blackboard and he would make a public tally of your 'rudeness' (talking when he was talking etc.). If it reached 5 by friday, no lunch break for you!

In secondary, we weren't allowed to shower because we would take too long so had to go for the rest of the day covered in mud and sweat from cross country or hockey.

Another one here who lived with rumours of an affair with a teacher! I have no idea where it came from, but people were convinced it was true. It wasn't. I did end up babysitting for him though, why not? Everyone already thought I was dating him...

We had another teacher who's housemate was dating a yr 11 girl. Awkward weekends...

SnoozleDoozle · 27/09/2011 20:55

My P3 teacher reached over and yanked out my wobbly tooth when I was about 7, because it was interfering with my speech when I was trying to read to her.

Same teacher used to handle the pupil's savings scheme, and every Friday (bank day) used to take my friend and I with her into town so that we could sit in the car so that she could park it outside the bank without it getting blown up. (this was N.Ireland in the 1980s, and you couldn't leave cars unattended in the street).

I loved her! Have very fond memories of her......

MorbidlyMoribund · 27/09/2011 20:56

Catholic primary next to the Church - every time there was a funeral that the teacher didn't think was well attended enough we got rolled out to sit at the back. I bet i attended two a week for four years....Hmm

Who on earth would want a bunch of random 9 year olds at their spouses funeral??? Confused

IfAtFirstUDontSucceed · 27/09/2011 20:57

My lovely but rather eccentric primary school teacher used to hurl piece of chalk across the room, and sometimes even the blackboard eraser (you know, that great big block of wood type thing). It was never actually aimed at anyone, but it scared the shit out of you and promptly shut the class up.

Once, he got so angry he tipped a desk over Shock - we were about 10 at the time.

We loved him to bits though and eventually became headmaster!

LimburgseVlaai · 27/09/2011 20:57

At secondary school, our English teacher was this spinster with weird purply-orange dyed hair. At the start of the lesson she would get one of the boys (and only ever one of the boys) to nip to the shops to buy her a packet of fags.

Most teachers smoked in class; some smoked cigars or pipes. One of them used to stink of beer as well, even first thing in the morning.

We had a geography teacher who was in the TA. He used to demonstrate how to bayonet the natives.

IfAtFirstUDontSucceed · 27/09/2011 20:57

and he eventually became headmaster!

IfAtFirstUDontSucceed · 27/09/2011 20:59

toddlerama I have memories of a meter stick getting slammed off desks too!

ReshapeWhileDave · 27/09/2011 21:02

Secondary school in the 80's, one evil creepy teacher (maths) used to creep up behind you (well, me) if you were sat quietly with a book at break, and breathe his foul cigar breath over your shoulder until you slowly turned round and saw his horrible paedo-specs about 3 inches away from your face. Creep.

Another teacher there, one I really liked, completely lost it with a very obnoxious boy in the class who was always provoking him, and hit his head back and forth with his hands. Boy was shocked to tears, and he was a well 'ard case. I'd imagine the teacher got into shit for that, but he didn't leave. Just as well, he was my favourite (and at the time, I thought the boy deserved it - it's only now that I'm a bit Shock).

CarnivalBizarre · 27/09/2011 21:08

I had a fab history teacher who swore like a trooper and used to dress accordingly to whatever stage in history we were learning, he turned up wearing a WW1 uniform complete with tin hat and taught that lesson crouched behind his desk (trench) and would now and again throw projectiles from his postion.

The Romans were great lessons, he turned up wearing a toga and propped himself on his desk and made us peel and feed him grapes as he gave the lesson - brilliant!! Learning was so much fun with him Smile

I doubt his teaching style would be allowed today though Sad

NeverAttributeToMalice · 27/09/2011 21:10

In my professional capacity, I use an inflatable hammer to help kids think fast, regularly threaten to use a ball gag on older students and frequently lob markers and small objects into kids' laps to get their attention. I have 2 colleagues who are married to former students. I love my job and the kids I work with and reckon I get on pretty well with most of them but I am considered a bit... strange.

As a child, I frequently watched one teacher throw something on the floor and make the bold child bend over to pick it up, whereupon he would wallop the wrongdoer on the behind. Another teacher picked up a boy and put him in the bin. Nobody minded as we were all fed up of the child's incessant chatter. We also endured cigarette smoking and the girls cleaned the staffroom on a rota. We never minded. We could make washing 5 cups last for 25 minutes Grin In secondary, we had a teacher who traded on the celebrity of her slightly famous sibling, another who forgot to come to class several times a week, one who banged his head off furniture and cried and a nun who touched girls inappropriately. I have enormously happy memories of school!

mamaduckbone · 27/09/2011 21:10

Our music block at middle school was in an old Victorian 4 storey building which I think used to be the schoolhouse. At the end of term the music teacher would allow anyone who wanted to to have a go at climbing the chimney. He also made anyone who misbehaved stand in the bin in the playground through the whole of breaktime (if it rained you had to put the bin lid on your head) and read us Magic Roundabout stories which we would act out with stuffed toys at aged 14.

chocolateyclur · 27/09/2011 21:11

Our RE teacher had a slipper called "Percy". Apparently he used to use it on students in days of yore whilst teaching PE, and he kept it in the hope he could use it on one of us one day.

ShowOfHands · 27/09/2011 21:13

Mr D picked up a student by his jacket lapels and slammed him forcibly against a wall before spitting in his face. It made a change from him rubbing his semi-erect penis against us as he forced us to squeeze past him on the way out of the door at lesson's end.

My friend had an affair with the (35yr old) CDT teacher from the age of 13. They moved in together eventually but they split up when he started showing an interest in another 13yo student.

One of the art teachers had a reputation for shutting himself in the supplies cupboard with young girls.

HecateGoddessOfTheNight · 27/09/2011 21:13

I had a teacher in primary school who used to throw the blackboard rubber at you - actually AT you - if you talked in class.

He would aim for your head. And get you!

Yes, Mr Alexander. You bastard.

WishIwereAtTheWiesnProst · 27/09/2011 21:14

Follow you home to your house if you claimed you forgot your homework but actually had done it. Hmm

Oh and I was messy so one used to take my desk to the door and dump it outside to be blwn about the play ground and I had to chase everything in the wind!.

One said I was too noisy and used to take my desk and put a tape square around me so no other kids were allowed in or out and no one could talk to me :(

Sometimes stick my desk in the corridor alone

I was clearly a pain in the arse tbf

notmydog · 27/09/2011 21:15

In the verx early eighties my year 5/6 science teacher always used to allow us to play with mercury. And he let the girls sit on his lap when marking our work books! Didn't think anything about it at the time, we were far too naive!

Alwaysworthchecking · 27/09/2011 21:15

youarekidding, I work in a primary school where having your name written on the board and missing playtime is allowed. I wish it wasn't - it's me who ends up having to supervise and I'm bloody gasping for a cup of tea by then!

Disclaimer: Always obviously feels very sorry for the children involved, it's just that she does get very thirsty and resents the whole 'missing her break too' thing. Especially when she didn't decide to keep them in.

When I was in 'top juniors' I went to sewing club after school and the teacher running the club lived in a house that backed onto the school field. One time she was telling us all about her home-grown strawberries. She then took us all up the field, lifted us over her fence and allowed us to pick strawberries. That was in the early eighties.

Same year in school, a boy in our class nicknamed himself 'Gaylord'. We had a very strict and - so we thought - humourless dinner lady. One day after lunch when we were meant to be settling down before register, he was mucking about and the dinner lady yelled, 'Sit DOWN, Gaylord!' He sat. She smiled. We thenceforth adored her and she never had to raise her voice to us again.