If my 3yo had access to AIBU...

[allhailtheaubergine]

AIBU to throw my bowl of pear across the kitchen?

Earlier today I demanded that my mother stop what she was doing and immediately get me a pear. She is by nature a difficult woman and she insisted on finishing her wee and washing her hands first . I explained loudly that this was unacceptable but, typically for her, my protestations only made her more stubborn. Then she moved the goalposts and decided that I could only have my pear if I said "please" (actually I worry about her in this respect - she is utterly obsessed with that word, it's not normal) so I stormed around the house for 25 minutes or so and then eventually gave in and said please (so now she'll think if she holds out long enough I'll end up saying "please" every time - made a rod for my own back there ).

Anyway, she asked me if I wanted the pear to be cut up or whole. I replied "cutted up" and the utter arse of a woman cut up my pear! I was speechless with rage! Obviously, words were not enough to express my fury so I threw the cutted up pear across the kitchen and kicked her in the shins.

WIBU?

I think she genuinely thinks I am BU and it's causing me to doubt myself. What do you think?

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Several posts later [dripfeed]:

Oh, and then I weed in my shorts because I was still cross. That'll learn her.

Having nearly strangled SmallSmelly today this thread has been more cathartic even than - thank you all.

PS. Hide stuff.

It will keep her questioning her own sanity .

This thread is priceless and whilst being bed bound with hyperemesis is a VERY welcome distraction

Mumsnet hall of fame

AIBU to keep repeating what I want for Christmas 100 times a day? My mummy says pregnancy has turned her brain fuzzy and she can't even remember what day of the week it is, so how am I supposed to rely on her 'membering what I want. So I think I'll tell her every day and show her pictures in the lovely book with toys in and then she can't blame me for not helping her remember. . . Parents; can't live with them, can't live without them

Remember OP, No is a complete sentance!

Morning all. Just checking in, and I have been at some of the stories here. YANBU!

AIBU to throw Mummy's words back in her face? Two can play at that "it's not time for that" game, after all. I only ask because she was all hurt and offended the first time I did it... although it did work and shut her up. I'm thinking of doing the same with her "broken record" technique, but am afraid it might ruin our relationship. What do you think?

AIBU to have woken mummy up at 5.30 this morning? I only kept her awake MOST of the night as I kept thinking she'd disappeared and screamed out for her. Obviously once she was in the room I knew she'd want to play and so was my most charming giggly self. She didn't seem impressed! I thought that was VU. I'm at my best at 2 in the morning.
She kept trying to leave the nursery after giving me cuddles but I knew that really she wanted to play so kept screaming up her until she came and lay next to the cot on the floor holding my hand. I thought this was VU as I wanted her to get in the cot with me so made my protests known until she cuddled me again. Must have drifted off as next thing I know the birds were outside my window and MUMMY HAD LEFT ME ALONE IN THE COT!
Of course I had to make sure she was around so yelled for her in my loudest voice just in case she couldnt hear me. She came in muttering about it being half past 5 but I know she was happy to see me.
Atm I'm spitting my breakfast over Daddy as he should know that Mummy's MUCH better at feeding me, but as a consolation prize I've got his phone in my sticky paws and am waiting for the right moment to drop it into my weetabix.....

Mini SayCool, 11 months.

YANBU. These mummies need to learn.

I have my mummy nicely trained. If she leaves me alone in the night I scream for hour or two. It's best to upset her too when she is tired and fragile by yelling "you unkind" "I am all alone" "this not fair". If she doesn't come I pee on carpet. Best to take jammies off first though so you can keep warm and just carpet is wet.

Also you need to mess with her mind. All this fruit stuff is fine but to get best effect you need sssycological warfare. Tell mummy she looks beautiful ... Then a minute later say "but you legs prickly. Cos you is old". Throws her for a bit see?

Little Gee 3.5 (ticker announcing not eaten fruit for two years, 1 month and 3 days)
(second ticker announcing 10 nights in a row peeing on carpet)

Oh and yy to using their phrases.

This week I mummy wouldn't get dolly so I said "you have legs". If her is naughty say "you naughty. I counting 1,2,3". I also tell her to share. She bad at sharing cake. She seems to eat fruit cake a lot though and as I am opposed to fruit on principle I can't eat that. Is it true that a lot of fruit cake looks like chocolate cake?

When you are playing with Transformers which are frankly aimed at quite a bit older than your 3.4 years, I find it best to throw a hissy fit because Bumblebee isn't transforming "prop-pear-LEEE". This was the case this morning. Was IBU to advise Mummy through my anguish that "and you can't help cos you're just a GIRL?".

Maybe I should ask this on the femmynis board instead.

I am so glad to find some company on this thread. I have a serious problem with my parents, who continually defile my poo places. I have a number of preferred poo venues including behind the curtains, behind the chair in my bedroom and under the cot, and I like to think that I manage to work up a good fug in each one, being a bit territorial like that. However my parents continually deny me this small pleasure and clean up after me, insisting I do my poos in the toilet. Where is the fun in that, I ask you? They need help.

mummy on 'puter all day making tappy tappy on keyboard thingy which she never let me touch !!! I want 'puter, I want tappy tappy.

mummy keep spitting tea on tappy tappy but she never let me put apple juice on tappy tappy. I think this double standards.

where my nom noms ?

mummy bad.

I've got a bad mummy too. She keeps trying to put me down in cot, or on play gym. Don't want to be put down. Want mummy cuddles. All the time. I'm very reasonable, if she absolutely has to use her hands I will accept cuddles in the sling. But she has to realise that she must NOT put me down and walk away, this is truly unacceptable behaviour. AIBU to scream as loud as I can every time she tries to do this? And then to give her the most adoring smile as soon as she comes back again? (Carrot and stick approach seems to work well).

pozzledbaby (14 weeks)

Like my sister said, bad mummy. She doesn't seem at all pleased that I've just taken all my tops out of the drawer and strewn them over the floor. I think the floor looks much prettier. Mummy then had the cheek to tell me that I can only wear one pair of knickers today- I want three, why shouldn't I wear three? Her ridiculous rules. Then, to add insult to injury, she's just told me that we're going to the really big, fun playground in the big park. Don't want to. Won't go. And she even tells me that I'm not allowed to play roughly with my sister, she likes being jumped on. All these excuses of 'she's too little, must be gentle, blah blah blah'.

WIBU to ignore everything she tells me?

pozzledtoddler (3.1)

Is she always this controlling?

Baby Aubergine, have you ever thought of writting a book on how to raise parents??

I think it would be a hit

Thank you Aubergine for making me laugh this morning - very funny x

Well I certainly don't think my brother is bu with regards to my silly mother, and I don't think he thinks I am bu either but thought I would garner opinion!

Just wanted to keep mummy on her toes with regards to security (well there is no big daddy around as he has been having a long day at work, thinking about it it has been a very long day as I have been to big school more than once!) so wibu to stand and stare at her to see how long it took her to wake up at 3.30am this morning? I don't think so, but apparently I was as my partner in crime, who usually checks out security, was asleep on the job for once (an unusual occurence for which I shall have to have words with him about!!!!)- mind you he has put in the overtime this week as obviously Daddy is having this long work day and Mummy (the cheeky moo) has decided that she has to go back to work too this very same week! (Shocking but apparently something to do with keeping me in Sylvanian Families? Well I haven't seen much evidence of that which is another thing - but I digress!)

So was I being u? I don't think so, it takes many many hours of concentration and careful deliberation to look scary in the middle of the night don't you think? I mean I am only just learning but I think I am pretty good at it now.

I can also tell you that she was bvu at 7am to tell me that I couldn't watch Nick Jnr, when I finally got her to give in she wasn't remotely sorry! And she was particularly ungrateful when I told her she could watch her television whilst I threw hard toys at the Prince's head. What more can I say? I know my Daddy isn't this unreasonable!

LittlePrincessFR 3.9

Last night I felt a bit poorly, I have snotty nose but managed to wipe it on my robot jammies so that was okay. But then I woke up at half past four and I knew it was still night time because I had stars on my clock and no sunny face so I yelled and yelled and yelled for mummy.

She didn't come. She is so mean.

She had said something earlier about how I am a bigger boy now and how I need to learn to sleep in my own bed, not in mummy and daddy's bed. I have tried to tell her that I like her bed much more than mine, there is lots of room and I can snuggle between them both and I feel safe.

She is having none of it though. She is cruel and cold hearted. I think that they might be doing noisy things in there, special kisses and stuff, which is why they want me to stay in my bed.

Well, that's not going to happen let me tell you! I'm not risking any baby dancing going on! No siree!

So my plan tonight is to shout and shout until I'm sick. Then mummy will have to come get me and I can sleep with her and daddy.

And if my jammies get too snotty, I can always use daddy's pillow.

Oh, you poor little souls. So many sad stories of meany baneany mothers, how can they treat you all like this?

This is the funniest thread since the Penguin date one

YANBU.

Your mother should have clearly known that when you asked for pear, you clearly did not want it. I have the same problem - when I ask for pear, I actually mean I want banana or yoghurt, but my mummy doesn't get it until I have bitten each bit of pear and declared "NO" and demanded banana and yoghurt.

That, and she looks at me funnily when I cry because there are no carrots left for eating at dinner time.

AND she dares to give me a biscuit every so often after lunch for a treat - does she not know I DON'T LIKE BISCUITS! I would prefer to nibble bits of celery and then through them at the cats.

We children need support to live with these awful parents.

Littletea (age 23 months)

IN my experience they just get even more U as you get older. I mean, I'm now 6 so I'm pretty much fully grown up and I do know alot about most things everything in the world universe. But my mother insists on me writing out all these words until I do HER way of spelling. I don't see the problem - I mean if no one else can read it, that's their problem, right? Crazy

And she's just sooooo U because she doesn't even have anything to do all day. I mean, we have to go to school and she just does nothing aaallll that time

And she doesn't like when I take the phone without asking and call my best friend ( who I've just said goodbye too) for ages. WTF. I mean I'm only trying to ease her gently into my rights as a teenager. I know that's another 7 years away but she has to learn.