All these people who cry "burglary!'.

[seeker]

It always happens at night and there are never any witnesses. I bet they either left the door open, just inviting people into their houses then shout "burglary!" when someone misreads their signals. Or they've just lost their stuff and say it was a burglary to get other people into trouble. Or some people just do it for the attention. People should take responsibilty for their stuff.

I love you all, and would like to take you all out to dinner on your lifted credit card.

aha! dinner! so as you fed us once, we can of course assume that you don't mind giving us stuff, so we can just help ourselves next time to anything you have.

Most people want their houses burgled anyway, they like the attention.

Ah yes UsingMainlySpoons - people should have much less sympathy for shops.

Well it's obviously the home owners fault. They are only burglars after all. If people go and buy nice things how are the buglars meant to know they don't it to be stolen? If you don't want to be burgled, don't buy nice things, it's simple really. How can we expect the poor burglars to control themselves in the face of nice things, it's what they do, afterall, they have urges and things don't they?

Yes I was going to mention a friend of mine whose actual job is giving out grants. She gets paid for giving stuff away, so how are people supposed to know that it's not ok to just go over to her house and nick the telly? It's her job! She's clearly willing to give stuff away, it's no wonder people are confused about the finer details or where and when. That's just nitpicking.

Also, some bollocks I made up based on my own assumptions evidence has shown that our caveman ancestors constantly walked into each other's caves and lifted half a sheep and some really good flint. How are people supposed to ignore millennia of crime tradition that is ingrained in their genes? The human race would have died out if not for those thieving bastards therefore it is natural and - by definition - good.

My friend could never be a burglar. He's a doctor and pillar of the community.

If you dress like a person who gives out grants, you cannot blame the poor burglar for not understanding that you don't wish to have money taken from you.

The problem is that men as a species today just don't know what is expected of them any more - the feminisation of schools, the demonisation of benevolent sexism, not knowing whether a woman will kick you in the nuts of you open a door..... I'm not condoning burglary in any way at all but men today just don't know whether to be a breadwinner or a New Dad or an arsehole any more.

I am both laughing at and feeling sorry for Rhubarb.

I was burgled. It was my own fault, because I went away for Christmas and left a downstairs window open. I don't usually talk about it because I feel ashamed and I know people will blame me for bringing it on myself.

MillyR

This is just like being rushed to A&E for emergency surgery, then moaning when the nurse stabs you in the eye years later Ridiculous

Often housewives who resent their husbands being at work all day punish them by giving away their things to anyone who knocks on the door.

Then when their husband comes home and asks where the telly is they panic and say the gasman nicked it.

Everyone knows that women love giving away their personal belongings, but then get embarrassed and afraid that their husbands/partners will find out and so they file false reports of burglary.

What's really important is that if people claim their things have gone missing and someone has smeared shit on their walls and smashed their windows, and it's only their word that they didn't do it themselves, they should go to prison for the same length of time as a burglar would have got had a burglary in fact taken place.

It's not proper burglary unless the burglar is armed with a gun or a knife, anyway. Everyone knows that.

And even if he is, if the householder doesn't at least pick up a few defensive injuries in the course of the burglary it's a bit suspect, IMO.

We should different categories of burglary. So if you steal something from a house you've been in a few times before as a guest a suspended sentence or community service would be enough.

But if you were a really bad burglar who wears a balaclava and burst into the house from behind the privet hedge then they should really throw the book at you.

oh you are so right. surely if there were no-one else present, we cannot know beyond any reasonable doubt if you were burgled or if you just gave the stuff away and now regret it.

Also everyone knows that having your stuff nicked and furniture broken etc is how some people enjoy themselves, so when the accused explains that the householder accosted them at random and asked them to come and vandalise their home, we should believe them.

We're in Classics, so it's here forever now. Can't wait to refer people to it. :o