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Was on a train yesterday and a woman got on with a penguin!

133 replies

VivaLeBeaver · 23/04/2011 12:34

Sat on the train and a woman comes racing up with a bundle under her arm. Sits down with this thing wrapped in a jumper which is sort of growling and hissing. The guard comes over for her money and she tells him she's got a penguin and she's taking it to the zoo which is at the next stop.

Guard looks a bit closer at the bird and points out that its a guillimot not a penguin. I'm now wetting myself with laughter. The woman asks the guard if the guillimot would have escaped from the zoo. The guard tells her its a wild bird and to go and put it back on the beach. She'd tied it's beak up and everything with a shoelace!!!!

I hope the poor bird is OK after been scooped up by a barmy OAP but it was so funny.

OP posts:

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VivaLeBeaver · 23/04/2011 16:46

She got off the train. It was one of those little land trains that they have at seaside resorts to get you from one end of the prom to the other. So the guard was also the driver.

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teahouse · 23/04/2011 16:46

I would love to have known what the Zoo would have done - hysterical

beautyspot · 23/04/2011 16:48

Poor traumatised Guillimot. What a story to tell its friends though. Not many Guillimots get on trains.

KurriKurri · 23/04/2011 17:35

pmsl at guillemot telling his friends about his 'adventure'.

LadyCornyOfSilk · 23/04/2011 17:37

did she put it back? It's probably still in her handbag.

VivaLeBeaver · 23/04/2011 20:22

I'm guessing she put it back. She said she was going to and I last saw her heading in the direction of the beach with the hissing guillemot under her arm.

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HerRoyalHighnessPrincessCervix · 23/04/2011 20:28

shit. has anyone seen my mother recently?

whomovedmychocolate · 23/04/2011 20:29

I can understand her mistake, if you have crap eyesite they do look like penguins. But the putting it on a train is just plain weird.

It's like the old joke, policeman pulls over a car and finds a man sitting next to a penguin and says: 'what are you doing with the penguin' and he replies: 'I'm taking it to the zoo.'. Next week, he pulls over the same car and still the man has the penguin. The policeman upbraids him 'I told you to take that penguin to the zoo'. 'I did the man says, he loved it, we're going to the cinema today'.

edwardsbella · 23/04/2011 20:42

i howled with laughter

ilovemyhens · 23/04/2011 20:45

What I'd like to know is how the heck she caught the poor thing

Perhaps you were just sitting there sunning itself, when some old biddy suddenly scoops you up and ties your beak with a shoelace then hauls you onto a bus. That's a crap day if you're a guillemot.

lukewarmmama · 23/04/2011 20:54

Oh oh oh, that's just fantastic. Best thing I've read on mn for aaaages.

LoopyLoopsNincompoop · 23/04/2011 20:55

Really? Honestly? Wow, that is hilarious! Brilliant! Why on earth didn't you take a photo?

VivaLeBeaver · 23/04/2011 21:01

I swear to God its true. Its too bizarre to make up. I'm kicking myself for not taking a photo but to be honest I never saw the alleged penguin as it was all wrapped up. So it would just have looked like a photo of some crazy lady with a rolled up jumper under her arm. I don't think she'd have been impressed if I'd asked her to uncover the penguin so I could take their photo to put on hte internet.

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DaydreamDollyisshrinking · 23/04/2011 21:03

whomoved that joke is genius, made me howl [bugrin]

whomovedmychocolate · 23/04/2011 21:03

I bet the guard insisted someone kept the CCTV footage though from the platform

Thingumy · 23/04/2011 21:03

Love a bit of surreality on MN.

UlrikaGarlic · 23/04/2011 21:08

talking of penguins...have you seen Sooo cute

nickschick · 23/04/2011 21:11

Ive been in a vile mood all day and this proper cheered me up........dh then asked me why I was laughing and proceeded to tell me this ...
'a policeman stopped thiss young man walking up the street with a penguin,he asked him what he was doing? the bloke replied hed found the penguin and was taking him for a walk.....a walk? you need to take him to the zoo the pc advised......next same policeman sees same bloke and the same penguin so he says to him I thought I told you to take that penguin to the zoo? oh i did said the bloke we had a good time today were off to the cinema'.............ohhhhh tying his beak with a shoelace??? lmao .

BanalChelping · 23/04/2011 21:21

So do you think she happened to have a jumper and an old shoelace when she saw the penguin, or did she pop it in her shopping basket and take it home to be trussed?

Honeydragon · 23/04/2011 21:27

Brilliant .....I wonder what the ornithological conducter would have charged if it had been a penguin? Are they allowed on?

VivaLeBeaver · 23/04/2011 21:28

The shoelace was off her own shoe - I checked as soon as she said she'd tied its beak up with a shoelace I looked down at her feet. She had those Granny canvas deck type shoes and one had no lace. I'm guessing the jumper was because old ladies worry that it may get a bit breezy on the beach and take a jumper with them everyhwere even when its 23degrees.

OP posts:

nickschick · 23/04/2011 21:29

Doesnt everone carry a jumper and a shoelace in case you find a penguin

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Honeydragon · 23/04/2011 21:33

I've just tried to tell dh whats so funny....it took 3 attempts as I kept giggling hysterically trying to tell him

DebiTheScot · 23/04/2011 22:12

Oh my goodness, that's hilarious! Crazy lady! (I think the birds are related so I can see how you could make the mistake)

FlightofFancy · 23/04/2011 22:16

Snorting with laughter!

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