Thickos on TripAdvisor

[bupcakesandcunting]

I usually check reviews about places on Trip Advisor before booking a holiday. I've been having a snoop round this morning for a holiday and went onto Trip Advisor to read the reviews and honestly, some of them look like they've been written by a bear mashing his paws into the keyboard and hitting "send"...

AIBU to disregard reviews by people who moan that "nobode understand ENGLISH" "no chips/salad just greek food" "wayter rude" or should I be giving them the same attention as the others?

From what I observed of Lolita she could handle it no problem. Staff was very friendly and many spoke at least some English. Some staff were well-versed. Didn't detect the Varadero attitude in the buffet whatsoever.

What on earth is Varadero attitude, and why did the buffet not have it?

Particularly like the run down of nationalities at the resort. Always good to know that there was someone there from Halifax, Nova Scotia. They know about good hotels in Halifax.

Thingumy that is brilliant!

I particularly like this part:

"Met some great people as always. Raymond, an elderly gentleman from England, talked with us in the mornings at the lobby bar while enjoying our cappuccino. Especially liked hearing of his trips to Thailand and Greece. Greg was an interesting man, originally from South Africa, but won't tell you his postal code (inside joke). Must respect everyone's sense of privacy and comfort level in being known. His adolescent daughter Emily was also very nice. Karen from the east coast shared a few meals with us. Always with her book and exploring the resort and surrounding area getting her daily physical activity and collecting rocks. We have rocks in Canada Karen!!! Lots of laughs. And the maid Aida and all the other Cubans who worked at the resort. If you're not careful they will melt your heart."

Bless.

'Ok,so my mate is terrified of spiders and done the clever thing of looking on google to see what they r like in Dominican! Whats the likelihood of us seeing any big ones in and around our hotel? Just to put a very worried mind to rest! Lol! Cheers.'

Please stop now weith this - am at my desk in a very quiet open plan office - I think my workmates think I'm having a seizure...

This thread is killing me

Here's a review of a hotel in southern Spain my grandparents visit quite often:

"After reading many many reviews of this hotel i thought twice AFTER I BOOKED THIS HOTEL. First thing i noticed about this complex was the lack of english people. I read alot of reviews refering to a very spanish holiday, i couldn't help but think "well you go to Spain u expect to see alot of spanish people". well i understood what they meant right away."

[...]

"After the first 2 days we came to ignore all the negatives and made a good holiday of it. What i will say is expect to experience alot of spanish culture as this hotel/complex is 98% spanish."

[...]

"To finish i will say we had a great holiday once we got used to the spanish feel, just be prepared to have a very spanish holiday (as our rep said "you are in Spain")."

Well done that rep, hahahaha!

'The Cubans recruit you from around the pool area and try their hardest to get you to be involved and to have some fun. It was excellent. If you wanted to have fun this was it. Life tends to smile on those who smile back. Kayaking in the pool. Crazy games near the snack bar etc. Of course you were encouraged to get sexy. Prize is always a bottle of rum or a free week at Club Cojimar or a million dollars. What do you think it is?'

Gabbylogon has been to Cuba then.

Quick! Someone find something else funny and get Omnishambles into trouble!

Pizza hut doesn't deliver .. . no this isn 't their fault but daggumit, it 's still
annoying. Domino 's did , but I wanted PH.

Where exactly does Pizza Hut not deliver to? Rome?

"Believe me, we did not need entertainment after watching this woman with her hands on his privates and his hands on her ---!
Would I stay in a Hotel that deems this kind of behavior? Definetly not!"

Haha at Gabbylogon Thingumy!

'my wife thought she was getting onion rings, it turned out to be squid'

Just found this one for a place in Barbados

" The bars were limited and stocked with only well liquor. The special night time activities on the beach and in the courtyard were well received."

my wife thought she was getting onion rings, it turned out to be squid

hahaha at the covert calamari

LOL @ Thingumy - "GabbyLogon has been to Cuba then"

" Drunken Bulgarian men having to be pulled out of the pool by holiday makers."

haha, my mum owns an appartment there!

This sounds quite traumatic, from someone staying at the Waldorf Astoria
"The worst part of my hotel experience was still to come. On my second to last night as I was lying on the bed I got up to put my slippers on and saw a cockroach on the floor next to the bed. I jumped up scared it would jump on me or something but observing it realized it was dead. I got a bunch of tissues, got my courage up and went to pick it up but the cockroach was so long dead the thing disintegrated into cockroach powder before my eyes. So now I was left with cockroach powder between my bed and the way to the bathroom. [weeps] I called reception to complain and they apologized and offered me free use of internet in the room or a free breakfast to make up for this. They also said they could come and clean it right away but as it was late I told him not to bother. I put a towel over cockroach powder and hoped they would clean it well the next day. I didn't take them up on their offer for free stuff, I didn't complain for that, I complained because in a legendary 5 star hotel I don't think I should be faced with such an experience in the first place."

Poor man . Imagine cockroach powder

OMG Cockroach powder!

I don't think cockroaches fully comprehend the star rating system.

'This hotel is totally bogus. Everything is done in a rinky dink way. It starts when you check in and they will only give you one room key even though there are multiply people staying in the room. They tell you it is for security. They explain that if you lose a key, somebody could make copies of it. Of course they have no answer for what happens if you lose the one key they do give you. Can't somebody still make copies of that?

Later, when you want some ice to set a drink in, you are told, you can get a cup of ice at the bar. Of course, you have to wait 5 minutes until the bar tender decides you are worth waiting on. And you get a Dixie cup with 3 cubes of ice in it. I guess letting people loose with an ice bucket at an ice machine could cost a nickel. They won't have any part of that.

When you tuck in for the night, don't toss and turn even a little bit. The sheets don't fit the bed. They quickly come out of place and you will be laying right on the mattress. And when you take a dump in the morning, flush halfway through it. Otherwise you will plug up the toilet.'

I thought he/she was spot on with:

If you are single, or just like to dance then definitely go to the disco.

Thanks, that's helpful.

And:

'Our room was ready and they told us the location and the room number.'

That's service for you. Most places just blindfold you and shove you in the general direction of the lifts, shouting - 'just keep trying doors until you find it you English Bitch.'

rinky dink.

Any idea what this means?
"The so called gym, the aircondltioned room lovely, but thats were it ends. The machines are poorly maintained, most have handles missing . feet missing and some that have been bodge repaired (in the no expence spared maintenance program) there is no induction on how to use the machinery. If you do use the gym and have an accident god forbid . CLAIM as the hotel doest not display a discaimer any where that the user uses the gym at there own risk anywhere ! my advice is DON'T USE IT ITS DANGEROUS"

'The special night time activities on the beach and in the courtyard were well received'

MumsieNonna