We Believe You: we're launching our rape awareness campaign today.

[KateMumsnet]

Today, we're very proud to be launching a new campaign. It's called 'We Believe You', and it's inspired by the many MNers who've asked us to speak out about the prevalence of rape and sexual assault in women's lives.

While we're at it, we're going to try to explode, once and for all, some pernicious myths about rape - about who does it, what it is, and whom it can happen to. These myths mean that many victims are denied justice: our survey confirmed that most don't report their rape or sexual assault, for fear of being disbelieved.

So the message of our campaign is in the title - we believe you. We hope MNers will get behind it, and spread that message far and wide - on Facebook, and on Twitter, using the hashtag #webelieveyou. And don't forget to let us know what you think here on this thread.

We're also giving a shout-out to Rape Crisis, the End Violence Against Women coalition, and Barnardo's - all of whom are supporting our campaign. They all work hard on sexual violence issues - either by supporting those who've experienced it, or campaigning for better prevention strategies - so do see if you can help them out.

MNHQ x

Good work HelenMN :)

Great campaign MN, thank you. HelenCC shows just why it is needed.

Great stuff, well done MN.

Excellent news, right behind you!

The trouble with getting justice for rape victims is that it is not just a case of the jury weighing up who they believe.They have to think that he is guilty beyongd all reasonable doubt.Given there is very often no witnesses present this is a very very difficult thing to do.
in the new rape awareness ad the girl is kissing the boy goes up to the bedroom with him. she haas no bumps or bruises and althouigh we have seen she was raped, how is a jury going to know BEYOND ALL REASONABLE DOUBT.
So whilst all the 'we believe you' campaign might be very nice and reassuring for the victim.I am not sure it really helps her in the lomg run what would be the point of that girl coming forward being cross examined, having her story crawled over , pulled to bits trying to trip her up (all of which of course are very necessary to ensure justice is done).She would have to relive it again and again and in the end it will very likely be a case of his word against hers which will never be enough for a conviction.

why was I deleted?

Generally there is a lot more evidence than his word against hers. That's another myth about rape.

it will very likely be a case of his word against hers which will never be enough for a conviction.

Rape myth.

Also "her word" is witness evidence which is in fact enough to secure a conviction in a court of law. It's the reason why the defense attacks victims because they want to make them seem like unreliable witnesses.

A huge problem is understaffing of the Criminal Justice System, there are all these guidelines published on the internet, but not enough staff to even come close to them.

The government (current and previous) have all these marvellous ideas, but there are little resources to put them in place.

And while this long winded process takes place, the victim is told, not to post on forums for support, not to text, that they must be careful what they say and who they talk to for fear of damaging their case.

Family members arent even suppose to talk to each other. This creates more fear for the victim while allowing the rapist to walk free, the victim (and family) live a life of fear, while the rapist isnt even obliged to tell those he is living, or his employer, he is charged with rape.

The system as it stands, is an agonising, long winded process or lurching from one date, to the next, to the next, to the next.

Thank you very much for the campaign, MNHQ, and for HelenMumsnet's post just then.

Ditto on the thanks! This is a great campaign.

Hello

I am 'Mary' the case study in the Independent. I have been in contact with Nina, who wrote the article, and KaiteMNHQ all weekend.

To read my experience in black and white this morning made my stomach churn. But it needed to be shared. There is a lot more that they didn't print and I guess I'm pleased that it was direct and to the point.

I have seen in the last few years on here, that I am not alone, reading posts from those who have been raped, abused for years on end and told that they are worthless, dirty and shameful brings home the very real and raw hard hitting truth that not enough rapes are reported. Maybe for the simple reason that we are told, as a society, that we will not be believed when we do report.

The accounts we read in the press tell us that it's usually a waste of time to report a rape or abusive attack. The Powers That Be are keen to pull a victim apart and scrutinise every single detail but by doing so, place doubt into both the jurors and the victim.

People think that rape only happens to women down dark alleys, alone and in the dark of night or in the middle of nowhere in broad day light.

I was raped and abused by my partner. For years. I didn't tell a soul because of his threats and his promises to change. Eight years on, I am only just coming to terms with what really happened to me, which is why I agreed to be the Case Study for the Independent.

No-one should have to live with the silent fear of rape and abuse. It is time to let that little, tiny voice shout loud and clear. We (the female race) are not 'fair game' should we choose to go out at night alone, or wear a short skirt, low cut blouse, high heels, we're not 'asking for it'.

After all, isn't it the case that most rapes are by people we know? We know our attackers. We live with them. We're married to them. They are part of our family.

The more we keep quiet, the more our rapists will walk away. I know that they actual conviction rates are poor to say the least but surely, the more we report, the more we challenge, the more courts and jury's have to listen?

Good for you Mary. I'm afraid I haven't read the article but sorry you went through that. Glad you see it for what it was.

Men don't 'get 5 years for rape'.

I don't have stats for % of convictions for false allegations which receive a custodial sentence but the only ones I've heard of have been imprisoned- and worse ie had children permanently removed.

Also as bad as false allegations are it is a crime of dishonesty not a crime of violence. IMO violent crimes should have harsher sentences.

Here you go Stealth

independant

independant with Marys story

There are 2 articles.

Mary - thank you for sharing your story, Im so glad to read you are now happily married and so sorry to read the terrible things you experienced.

I have linked for anyone who is interested but if you'd prefer the links not to be here please report them and ask HQ to remove.

MN I am completely bowled over with what you have done in this campaign - thank you so so much.

Reading the rape myths being challenged, here in black and white, has brought tears to my eyes because I am so used to seeing these rape myths perpetuated everywhere else. (Oh, and welcome to those who have done just that already on this thread Shame on you for that)

Thank you MN.

Mary, thanks you for sharing your harrowing story too.

Thank you Mary for sharing your story and the other women on this thread who have done so.

I totally agree that talking about this, bringing it into the open, is the way forward. Most women never tell and so as far as people at large are concerned it's not happening.

Just - not at all, I am happy for the links to be there. I am also happy to PM anyone with the full story if they want it.

Mary, thank you for doing what you did with your case study. I am just so sad you had to go through it in the first place.

Name changer here too.

My sister was "date raped" (awful, awful term). She reported it to the police and was one of the few cases where it went to court, but of course he was found not guilty (we now know that only 5% of men accused at court are actually found guilty) despite there being medical and other evidence to support what really happened. The defendant (sorry, the RAPIST) had 18 months to come up with a defence that was just laughable and find a medical doctor prepared to offer some reasonable doubt. My sister had no idea what was happening and never met the prosecution barrister until she gave evidence (as victims are just treated as witnesses).

The jury never knew that the two women in the public gallery were from Rape Crisis, they can't be told that in case it prejudices the outcome. She only reported it to try to stop it happening to someone else, but frankly, she was raped again in court, and this time in public. The rapist was also given a clear indication that this society tolerates despicable violence against women.

He was so confident, no doubt on the advice of his solicitor, that he would walk free. He did, and did not have one family or friend with him, and no doubt he lives his live, happy to attack once more, if indeed he hasn't already.

I hate to say this, but the truth is - if you are attacked by someone you know (and most people are) then it is not worth reporting it to the police. 95% of cases that go to court will end in a not guilty verdict. In some forces, it is an even lower figure. This doesn't even cover the fact that the CPS will now only take cases to court where they think they have a realistic chance of conviction, most never get that far due to 'lack of evidence'. All the legal system does is harm women more.

So sorry for all that have shared their experiences here.

This campaign is being discussed on LBC NOW !