Anyone expecting twins April/May?

[Amelia891]

Hi!

I’ve recently found out that I’m expecting twins early May. Over the moon and super excited but obviously also a little nervous! I have a DD who will be 3 just before the twins arrive. Anyone else here expecting twins around the same time? Would be great to have someone to chat to who is going through the same thing!! x

I haven’t told work yet as I’m just 12 weeks and waiting to see what the NIPT results come back as. Boss expects everyone in the office, but might take a different view once he knows about my condition.

Does anyone recall whether there’s a difference in NT screening dates for twins than singletons? Having the NHS scan and combined test at what will be around 13+4 but Midwife seemed to think it might have to be moved. The NTs were taken on my private scan and measured 1.4 & 1.5 at 11+3 which sonographer was happy with. It may be a moot point anyway as I’ve opted for NIPT privately but would like the reassurance of both tests if possible.

@TheMagicDeckchair

I was supposed to have NT at my 12 week scan at 11+6 but they wouldn't sit still and the NHS only allow 2 chances to get the measurements. I had it done privately at 13+2 - I was told the 13+6 limit still applied to a twin pregnancy as a single one

I did the NIPT too for additional reassurance. I first had it done around 11 weeks and that came Back insufficient DNA so had to be redrawn around 13 weeks and that time we got our results - low risk. Just bear in mind if you are having fraternal twins you'll only get a result for downs/Edwards/pateus - you don't get given results for all the other disorders a singleton pregnancy would test for

@ivfbeenbusy thanks for the reassurance- I think it should be fine left at the original date.

The trisomies were my main testing concern, so long as the screening covers Downs, Edwards and Patau I am happy with that. Hopefully the results will be through in a week.

Big day for me yesterday! Went for my 12 week scan and saw both of my long legged twins! Turns out I’m 14+1 not 13+3 so I couldn’t have any of the NHS screening tests, so we’ve paid for an NIPT privately this Sunday. They go off the bigger twin so my small twin was technically within the date limit but big twin wasn’t so they couldn’t do the tests.

They told me I’m having scans every 2 weeks from now on so my next scan is only in 10 days! All the ‘high-risk’ chat was a bit scary but I’m so happy I get to see them every 2 weeks. They confirmed I’m having MCDA twins (separate sacs but shared placenta) hence all the extra scans.

They also moved my due date to 4th May but said they won’t let MCDA twins go past 36 weeks which takes me to 6th April. So now I guess that’s my ‘real’ due date!?

I actually got made redundant last Christmas pre-Covid (I was pleased about it, got a good pay out and was fed up of the commute and missing my daughter) I was planning to find something else but no luck due to Covid so this year I’ve been a stay at home mum and running an Etsy shop, although I’m thinking about winding that up at Christmas so I can spend my evenings resting a bit more!

@Amelia891 great news about seeing the twins on your scan! I was put forward by a few days on mine too. I uhmmed and ahhed about doing the NIPT but I’m so glad I did it now knowing that DH could be there too. When the sonographer established there were twins, she actually recommended the Panorama test as it gives better accuracy for twins- although that might be as ours were separate sacs and placentas. Something to do with ascertaining whether they are id or fraternal and better gender accuracy. It was more expensive so we had to whip out the credit card- joked to DH he’d better get used to that! Our cars only have 2 x isofixes so we’re going to have to bring forward a car upgrade. We had everything in place and were “ready” for another one- it’s now getting our heads around a bonus one, and all the extra costs that entails.

My official 12 week scan is on 16/11 so I guess I will find out more about what happens then. I think your plan going forward sounds great.

When is everyone planning to start maternity leave? I work in a sedentary office role but it is a bit of commute and I had backache sitting for 8+ hours a day in my last pregnancy. I finished at 36 weeks last time but I’m thinking to finish between 30-32 weeks this time.

Exactly the same as us @TheMagicDeckchair, I thought we’d hardly need to buy anything as we already had the pram, car seat etc from our first baby but now there is so much extra to get and think about! Although hoping to sell the old pram to put the money towards a double. The car issue is one we are also facing!!

To be honest I didn’t realise the panorama/harmony/NIPT were different!? I thought they basically all did the same thing, maybe I need to do some more research. My next scan is also 16th (I’ll be 16 weeks)

I'm lucky to be able to work from home so will work as close to possible to my due date (I only get 18 weeks maternity leave as I'm the main earner so don't want to start maternity leave early if I can help it)

For you ladies not as far along as me (I'm nearly 25 weeks) all I would say is if I was doing my usual job - I usually work up and down the country, long car journeys, train/plane trips, lots of running around various cities I'd be struggling even now (and started to find it hard around 18 weeks). Too long on my feet or walking too far means they rest of the day spent in pain as bump/pelvis/hips hurt. I'm 5ft3 and was pretty petite but relatively fit and healthy but physically I'm starting to feel how brutal a twin pregnancy is! So if you are on your feet a lot I'd be considering finishing work early

I have this month at home which will take me to 22 weeks and then only two more weeks at work before I’m off for another 2. I’m hoping I make it that far without too much discomfort and will see where I am then. Like all of us I don’t want to start maternity leave too early just because I want to spend time with then after and I’m the only earner so every little helps!

@Amelia891 I’ve read a bit more about this. The Panorama test was recommended to us because the twins have separate placentas and sacs, and the test can determine if they’re a identical or fraternal twins, and also the sex of both twins. As yours share a placenta they are presumably identical? So you can fairly safely assume the sex is the same, and the basic test might be fine for you. I am sure the clinic will advise you

@ivfbeenbusy I guess at 25 weeks you are probably close in size to what a full term singleton pregnancy would be?

@Gidget19 can you make a decision nearer the time when you go on leave? I have a stand-alone job in a small company that no-one else can cover so work will either have to hire someone to cover me or outsource parts of my job.

I did some calculations today and worked out that even on SMP I will be better off on mat leave than sending 2 to nursery 3 days a week! Luckily DD gets 30 free hours from Jan, so that only leaves me with 2 days a week with them all at home. Still worried about how we’ll cope! Before I found out about the twins I was thinking about what baby classes I’d do this time around when DD is at nursery but I think this one will be a very different mat leave...

@TheMagicDeckchair Yes I am lucky that I can decide right up to the last minute so am just going to have to see how I am and how they are doing.

The childcare thing is a definite worry. I need the maternity pay and was planning I go to take a year but between them being 1 and getting their free hours; childcare is my exact wages! Not quite sure what to do about work after my year.

@Gidget19

I have my twins names down for a childminder already - we have a tight budget as before/after school for older DD is already £400 a month.

Childminders in my area are half the cost of nurseries and I've found one for £35 per child per day but I'm doing a term time only contract and believe me it saves loads of money - with the tax free childcare account it will be around £870 a month in total (when DD was in full time childcare over 50 weeks it was £850 per month alone just for her!!)

You'll need to take annual leave for all "school" holidays but between DH has I we should just about manage it and we'd need to take time off for DD anyway so no point paying for the twins to go when we'd all be home anyway

@Gidget19 there are advantages and disadvantages to working vs being at home. I enjoyed going back to the office when mat leave finished with DD, but I work 3 days and have a fairly laid-back job. It was easier than being at home with DD all day (high needs child) and I felt more myself again. Looking back I probably had PND and going back to work actually helped me. Financially it made sense as I took home most of my salary even after childcare. If you work you will get annual leave entitlements so if you fancy a day off from everything (to sleep perhaps) you can drop the babies at nursery and have a break alone.

OTOH if you’re at home you don’t need to worry about getting everyone up, dressed and out of the door; if one or both of the babies are sick you’re at home anyway and not trying to juggle your workload/ringing in to your employer and feeling guilty about taking time off, and you get to spend the time with your babies.

If you take a career break will you be able to return at the same level when they get their free hours?

@TheMagicDeckchair I’m a teacher so time off in term time is pretty frowned upon but it’s good that there will also always be jobs for teachers.

I think lots of women don’t realise they have PND until after the fact but am pleased that you eventually started feeling better.

Morning, off for my NIPT today. Driving over an hour for it as it was £200 cheaper than the clinics near me! Called them to find out a bit more about the specific test and she explained that Harmony and the one I’m having ‘Vision’ are both equally good types of NIPT test but that Vision is a newer type so it’s less well known but it essentially is exactly the same.

Excited to see my babies again today. Do they do measurements etc on the scan or are they just having a quick check that everything looks ok before they do the blood test?

Sorry posted too soon there. I was going to say that I would like to go back to work part time eventually but there is no way the twins will be able to go to the nursery my DD is currently
at due to cost so I think we’d be also looking into childminders. My plan was to find another job before I got pregnant this time but it was just impossible due to Covid so going to have to plan carefully as we won’t have mat pay to help this time.

@Amelia891I hope the scan goes well, let us know how they are doing. I’m not sure what they will do at your test but they spend ages doing measurements at mine. The twins were in great positions so it was drama free.

Good luck!

@Amelia891 good luck today with the scan. At mine they measured the babies, measured the NT, looked for nasal bones, skull, stomach etc. It was very in depth and I received a report afterwards with all the findings. I found it more detailed than an NHS scan.

There seemed to be loads of different NIPT tests so I’m sure the clinic knows which ones are most suitable for your circumstances.

Thanks @TheMagicDeckchair @Gidget19 NIPT went well. Twins have totally swapped sides since my NHS scan on Weds and the littler twin has caught up a bit so feeling reassured about that. They were face to face today and we got a photo of them together which was nice as the NHS scan just gave us two individual pics. Now just got to try and stay busy for 5-7 working days whilst I wait for the result!!

How is everyone else doing?

@Amelia891yay! Glad it was ok and that you managed to get them in the same pic. My only pic of the two of them was at 7 weeks when they just looked like blobs. The other scans they were laying very separately and I think they will probably be too big to get in one shot now.

@Amelia891 glad everything went ok with your scan. It feels like a long wait for the results.

I’ve felt nauseous and off food again (though I was past that bit) and I just can’t tell if I’m hungry or not. I feel constantly bloated, don’t eat then feel worse. I had some very distinct stretching on one side yesterday but less so on the other. I am worried about losing one of them, I’m not sure why.

Only another week now until my NHS scan. If I hadn’t had the NIPT I would still be none the wiser!

@TheMagicDeckchair you aren’t alone there. I’m convinced that because I’m quite small one of them won’t make it. Maybe it’s just usual twin paranoia. Hope so anyway!

@Gidget19 my grandma had identical twins and she was a petite lady. We are twinny families! Of course back in those days there was no ultrasound so you found out there were twins in the delivery suite!

We’ve started looking down the financial drain that is childcare for two. Poor DH is a bit shellshocked, I don’t think he’d thought it could possibly be all that much! Has anyone found that nurseries or childminders tend to do discounted rates for multiples? BOGOF would be asking a bit too much I guess but anything would help!

And yes to the big paranoia about something happening to one. I’m so attached now to the idea of two, it’s terrifying to think of that going wrong. The (normal I think) second trimester (15 weeks) lack of major symptoms is quite unsettling. It just feels less like there’s something going on in there at the moment than it did before. Counting down the days to my next scan. Also on constant bump watch - definitely seeing changes but it might be 70% lockdown snacking...

BOGOF would be amazing but you'll be lucky to get a 5% sibling discount and that's it

Have a look at the tax free childcare account - whatever you pay in the government tops up by another 20% so is worth about £200 a month PER child - BUT not every nursery or childminder is signed up to it so make sure you check before signing up to them

Also see if you can sign up to a term time only contract - also saves loads of money but means you'll need to take annual leave for all the "school" holidays between you and your DH but we make it worth by both buying the maximum amount of additional annual leave that we can from our employers

My childminder who is lined up for the twins is one of the cheapest in my area already so I didn't feel like I could ask for a discount plus not every childminder Wants to take 2 of the same age at the same time

We are also taking out a £25k loan over 10 years which will pay for childcare for the 2 years until 30 hours kicks in - repayments on the loan are £350 a month

When I had DD I had a total panic about childcare costs - I was VERY naive - her monthly full time care was £850 a month for 50 weeks for a childminder (didn't know about term time contracts then) - would have been about £1200 at a nursery.

@ivfbeenbusy thank you, that is SO helpful! It’s slightly overwhelming trying to make sure we’re making the right decisions and it always seems slightly mysterious how other people manage it so I really appreciate you setting it all out We’ll make it work!