omg the comment about tears of rage re. Partner’s choice to see to non urgent housework in times of peak stress could be me talking…
I know this is an old thread but I am currently feeling like many of you said you were. Alone, extremely stressed, extremely exhausted and now extremely worried about the state of my relationship.
2yo twins and 4 year old singleton. Have self diagnosed with PND after twins (not the kind where bonding is difficult because it hasn’t been) but the kind where due to utter exhaustion (no family help and full SAHM) I’ve been crushed with depression and lack of self confidence.
partner works abroad often and when home is commuting to London. His salary means we don’t meet threshold for childcare financial help yet out combined income (if I was back working ) would be too little to afford all three in childcare. So I’m stuck at home, unemployed, looking after three toddlers alone and have zero friends and family around (moved to a new town after the twins for house/affordability)
Now feel like a single parent without any independence. Stressed and depressed and this reflects in my parenting at times (sadly) - try my best to hide it but can’t help but snap or become fearful at times (always try to explain or hide it from the kids / apologise)
exceptionally hard to deal with poor mental health when having to also put a good parent face on and entertain three energetic toddlers all day
my relationship has died a death. No sex for a couple of years (basically since conception of the twins) , no talking, no dates, no connection. Not many big arguments, but no feeling. My feelings / attraction are solely dependent on connection and without it it’s lost. Yet no time or opportunity for connecting, totally feel lost.
have the children and house of my dreams. My partner has the job of his dreams. But together we are no longer in a relationship of our dreams.
any advice would be welcomed!!!