When do they start sleeping?

[chocolatedrops31]

My twins are 3 weeks old and so in no routine yet and feeding non stop pretty much at night-1 then the next then the 1st again, and I'm not getting sleep..I know that's to be expected at the moment but just looking for the light at the end of the tunnel really..when does the sleeping get better and any tips?! Thank you!

I didn't want to leave this post unanswered, although I don't have multiples.

My ds was born at 42wks and weighes 9lb 1oz, he had a huge appetite and still does three yeras later. Until around 12 weeks old he fed every 90mins-2hours, he then went to 3hourly feeds until around six months old. Then he dropped to one night feed at 7 months and slept through 7am-7pm from 8/9months and has done ever since.

What I would say, is all babies are different and will fall into their own patterns in time. It does get easier. I imagine the early days with twins must be absolutely relentless. Do you have any support from dh or your family?

I had twins and didn't exclusively BF. I gave them a bottle about 6pm as had very little milk left and by giving them a bottle they then slept until about 10pm.Prior to this I spent all evening feeding!I would then feed every 3 hours through the night. If I fed one I would then always wake the other and feed, so I could get a little bit of sleep. At about 3 months we started to manage every 4 hours in the night. I tried to feed them every 3 hours during the day so we could get 4 hours at night.
I am a bit of a control freak and wrote down when they fed to try and establish a pattern, and then tried to stick to the same times every day. This meant I knew I could nip to Tesco and not have a screaming baby!
It does get easier, but I can't remember when we slept through the night!
In the early days I did spend quite a lot of time lying on the sofa during the day watching day time TV, too knackered to read anything apart from magazines!

Thanks for your replies.. I'll try waking the other twin when one wakes although it's so hard to do that because it means not Bfing while lying down so it takes extra effort! Will try tonight though..have also started offering bottles in early evening because my milk supply pretty low I think..hoping for a better night tonight!

I think it is worth waking them to feed together in the day at least. And sticking to some sort of schedule in the day (very vague, like every three hours minimum, not on the dot) which might mean they wake up less in the night. Have you googled "biological nurturing", for the nightfeeds, where you lie down supported by pillows and the babies manage to latch themselves on, and you don't have to sit up? I remember it was torture, especially after caesarian trying to sit up in bed, and arrange pillows without help, and then latch on two babies whilst sitting boltupright.

I think there are some advantages to doing a few feeds separately though day and night, just that it is very time consuming, and if you are sleep deprived it might be the thing that stops you breastfeeding in the end. Tandem feeding feels much more like being a milk machine to start but you get used to it and it is just as satisfying, and so sweet to see the two little heads, and when they start holding hands.

Is there someone who can give you moral support for at least one night feed, dh or other relative, perhaps change and settle babies, bring them to you when they cry. Just even for one night. It makes a difference, that and someone taking them away first thing in the morning out of earshot after a long night so you can get a tiny bit extra sleep. And a cup of tea for when you wake up for first morning feed at 7am say.

Ours started sleeping through at 12 weeks, which I credit almost completely to a routine that worked for us... so I'd say to maybe start there? I made sure to wake both twins at the same time and tandem fed whenever possible as that literally halved the amout of time I had to be awake to feed them. It got them on the same schedule, which gave me a bigger chunk of sleep in between feeds.

DH and I also moved the twins into their own room and took 6-hour shifts (8-2, 2-8) sleeping on the guest bed in there so that each of us got a got a minimum 6 hour chunk of uninterrupted sleep, even if the babies were a nightmare. We got more if the babies settled well and slept well between feeds--sometimes managed 8 hours each. I would just pump right before going to sleep on my shift and then he could take over one of the feeds and give bottles on his shift. The shift system saved our lives in those early days!

Forgot to add, I let DH do the 11pm bottle feed as that was the one where my supply was lowest... I also didn't tandem feed in the daytime as I quite enjoyed doing one at a time when I wasn't sleep deprived--made me feel more like a mother and less like a milk machine!

Thanks v much for your advice. Linguaphile, did you follow a particular routine or was it just a 3 hourly cycle? Sleeping through at 12 weeks sounds amazing! Last night I tried to wake them at the same time which worked for the first 2 feeds but then 1 twin woke up after another hour apparently starving, the other wasn't interested in eating and the night became very difficult after that! I guess it should get a bit easier as they get older. I'm sleeping in the spare room with them and I haven't wanted to involve my DH because he works long hours and hasn't had practice in resettling them etc (I'm a bit of a control freak!) but might have to -the exhaustion is too much! I have a 2 year old so am not really able to sleep in much in the morning..

Swanhild, thanks I will look up biological nurturing. I do have family support and we are looking to employ some paid help during the day so that should help

Mine are 6 months and are still waking for at least one night feed. I'm insanely jealous of Lingua! I know how you feel about being a control freak, until about 2 weeks ago I did all the night feeds (and that's without a 2 yo - no idea how you manage it!) but now DH does the first one (depends on how much they've had at bed time, has been 12.30) and then I do the rest. I've also started going to bed early which is good, and really makes a difference. This week they've started not waking for a second feed, regardless of how much they've had, so DH does the feed if they wake up before 2, or me after, but then they sleep until morning (which was 5.30 this morning, nice!).

I know this is a way off for you, but accept help. I know it's hard, but you need sleep. There was a thing in the TAMBA magazine that said that if you're looking after the babies in the day that's still working and you need to share the night feeds. Nothing bad has happened to DH as a result of reduced sleep, and the babies seem to go back to sleep better for him!

We were on 3 hours in the day for a long time (still are mainly) but from about 9 weeks they started going a bit longer from 'bedtime' and we got our evenings back. At night I would feed them separately but waking the second to feed after the first had finished rather than feeding on demand. If they woke at the same time I'd feed them together. In the day it would just depend on whether they were hungry at the same time!

Hi there, like a lot of the people on this thread I also used bottles/formular for evening and nighttime. I started doing it about 3 weeks in as i felt so tired and even though my husband was helping with the nightfeeds there was no telling what time they would wake, and we wanted them to sleep for at least 4 hour chunks rather than every 1-3 hours, so we could get sleep. I also felt it was very difficult to breastfeed in the middle of the night unless i had one at a time. Anyway, after we started using bottles at nighttime and at their 7pm bedtime (as well as boob - i would just top them up with bottle at 7pm) they started sleeping longer and longer. At the same time we had a strict daytime routine (used the gina ford book) with naps in place, keeping them in synch with each other so we knew they'd had the same amount of daytime sleep and daytime milk as each other. then they slept through at 11 weeks (from 7am -5.30am). So I think its a combination of having the daytime routine, ground hog day!! and maybe the formula helped too.
Early on we found that giving ours a dreamfeed or a 10pm feed actually disturbed their sleep cycle. One day we decided not to give it and they actually slept from 7pm - 2am, which was a big shock to us all. Shortly after that (that was at about 7 weeks in) we decided not to give them their 2am feed if they didn't wake and they then started doing longer and longer stretches. What a relief it was!
As they were sleeping til 5.30am I would still feed them at 5.30am but put them back to bed and then gradually they stopped waking at 5.30am and slept in til 6.30/7.30am some days.
I found when the clocks changes march time it made a big difference, because they didn't know the difference and were sleeping til 7.30am instead of 6.30am.
Hope this helps.
x
ps. yes waking them at the same time at night helps. We used two bouncer chairs and I would give one some milk to calm her down, then put her in the chair while I fed the other one. Taking turns until they'd finished their bottle. Then back to bed, no talking, no lights, just back in cot then back to sleep. They sometimes wailed a bit but within a minute or two they'd be back to sleep and eventually they didn't mind

Hiya, some great advice here. Just to add, my Dh didn't get involved at all as he works long hours and had to deal with our older dcs, so I did it all by myself, it is do-able just about!
I moved into spare room and had a baby either side of bed in Moses baskets. I always dual feeded as otherwise would have been feeding all the time, and always woke the other baby if one woke up in the night. I never expressed as just another job in very limited spare time. I sat up in bed (invested in an electric blanket) and surfed the internet on my phone (mainly mumsnet) whilst feeding to keep me awake. I also made sure the babies had a good feed at 6pm then put them down (if they woke up in evening so be it, I would feed them) and another good feed and a nappy change at 10pm. They are now 7 months, and are at last sleeping through (in the last month). Good luck x

I struggled with timings for feeds for my two, as they were very different weights, so DD always had one more feed a day than DS. At about three weeks I started expressing and then topping up with formula, so DH could help with night feeds. We usually did the formula feed around 10pm.

DS, the bigger twin, started sleeping longer six hour stretches from 5 weeks and DD about 8 weeks. Obviously it wasn't every night, but enough to help. We'd split feeds so that I took the first waker, DH the second, then me the third time. Gradually they dropped off, so DH always had less but it gave me a chance for a stretch of sleep too.It worked for us not waking the other twin, but a lot of the was down to their size difference (over 3lb at birth).

Hi Chocolate, we just loosely followed the Gina Ford twins routine. I know it's not for everyone, but at 4 weeks in with babies that wouldn't settle at night, we were both just so exhausted that we actually wanted someone to tell us exactly what to do at every point in the day! I think my big takeaways from her were the principles of a consistent bedtime routine at the same time every night--for us it was 7pm (bath, bottle/breast, blackout curtains, sleep sacks, sound machine) and the idea of needing a certain number of hours of sleep in the day at certain general times (i.e., they need X hours of sleep in the day, only X of which should be in the morning as morning sleep functions differently from afternoon sleep for restoration vs. catching up, etc).

I know a lot of women find her routines hard as she's quite rigid, but we just used her stuff as a guideline and adapted as necessary for outings, play groups, etc. Worst case scenario with deviating: the whole day's schedule goes to pot, you have a fussy baby at bedtime, and you just start fresh the next day. :)

Thanks for enormously helpful replies-will start trying the various tips..Linguaphile did following Gina ford help with their sleeping?

I loosely followed Gf too, golden rules as I seem to remember was put them down for nap around 9ish BUT don't let them sleep after 10am as ruins next sleep, fat sleep around lunch, don't let them sleep after 4pm as won't be tired for bedtime. But don't get too hung up on specifix timings etc, else it will make you anxious x

Yes, it helped enormously--we actually thought that we had colicky babies before starting the routine because they just wouldn't settle in the evenings... they would cry for hours, sometimes until 2am. Turned out they were just overtired and overstimulated. The very first night we used a
proper bedtime routine and put them down with a bath and big feed at 7 with their sleep machine, they slept straight through until 10pm (their next feed) and fairly solidly through each subsequent 3-hour stretch. It was like having new babies. Best part about it was that we actually got our 'us time' back in the evenings, which was a godsend, and they were also a lot happier in the day because they were better rested. Now at 6 months, they sleep a solid 7-7 night without having ever had to sleep train or cry it out.

I was wary of Gina at first, but a lot of mums on here said that their babies ended up falling into a similar rhythm to her routines eventually, which is why we gave it a try. The book is called 'A Contented House With Twins'. I think the whole point of the routine is that it anticipates what your babies need at what times (more or less) so that the babies don't often have cause to cry, which obviously makes life easier for everyone! We got compliments all the time on how happy and good-natured our babies were, but I honestly think it was because of simple things that the routine helped with like like being well rested and fed before they got too hungry.

I would personally say never wake a sleeping baby at night for a feed... That could have been the night it slept through !
I have a boy and a girl, 12 weeks ok Friday. My girl will sleep a good 8 hours roughly 10 - 6 but my boy is still wanting the dreaded 3o clock feed even though he eats so much during the day! It is getting better though, every week so thre is hope! You will also start learning what their little noises mean in the night and you will know if you can ignore it or if they're about the kick off!