Life with twins 3

[GibberingGinger]

Like some sort of film sequel, or a royal dynasty, welcome to Life with twins III, a thread for general discussions and sharing experiences of having (or expecting) twins.

Can I join too? I have 19+5 week old ID twin girls (born at 36 weeks)

Can't write much but wanted to say BB3 - hope DS gets better very soon. I only ever had a bad experience when expressing while away from the girls (went away for the weekend when they were 5 months) but I did try to replicate the feeds they would have had to keep it going. I found it very hard to drain the breast adequately by using a pump only but think that was partly because I used a different travel pump while away and previously at home I'd rented a hospital-grade one which was much better. Hope you can be reunited with your girls asap - how horrible to be taken away so suddenly :(

We are now encamped at my mother's, having stayed in the shit-hole that is the Gatwick Hilton last night and a stopover hotel just outside Paris the night before. First night we got two adjoining rooms; last night we were all in the same room. Moral of the story is that TWO ROOMS IS VASTLY SUPERIOR. First night girls went to sleep and we lay in bed sipping wine and watching Coen Bros 'True Grit' on the telly. Bliss! Second night was agony trying to whisper while trapped in a dark room, unable to leave because monitor didn't work, but girls not dropping off to sleep because they knew we were there. Drive was okay all in all, just can't believe we are BACK! I have so much to do re. house purchase/etc, can't get my head around it.

tarti - I am going HARD CORE. No idea how really but I have to drop a stone at least, and fast. Also having to do emergency ASOS shop to keep me going because I have nothing to wear. Tried to join a Style and Beauty thread about making more effort to be vain because I have been seriously slobbing around recently, but am too much of a slob to even keep up with that. Although I did manage to blow dry my hair properly both mornings of waking up in hotel, even applying make up yesterday morning and know it makes me feel heaps better when I do make an effort.

Waves to all, and welcome to KforKitty :)

Hello everyone (new and old) Happy 2012 namechanger GG here.

Hope everyone had a good Christmas despite the illnesses ( poor kiddies with bronchiloitis ) Mine was very quiet, but very enjoyable.

Re dropping night feeds, despite my best efforts my boys still woke for milk at 4am right up until 11 months. This was despite dinner at 5.30, milk at 7pm, dream feed at 10.30pm. But once they dropped the middle of the night feed, we managed to drop the dream feed relatively quickly, about 13months.

Tarti, bad news, I know of kids who gave up naps at around 20 months . However I also know of kids who still have a nap at 4 y.o. I hope yours are just having a change of routine and settle back to naps soon. D still likes 2 naps a day but J is fighting any nap at all at the moment. 20 minutes he had today and he was a grumpy bugger because of it!

LL, good luck with all the house stuff. An exciting start to 2012

My resolution this year, apart from the recurring, must loose weight, it to spend less time on Mumsnet and the internet in general. I can fritter away an entire evening just browsing stuff. Especially wasteful when there is so much needing doing round the house So don't be offended mumsnetters if I am not around quite so much, but will definitely check in at least weekly - my willpower to stay off the internet isn't that strong!

Hi all, goodness the illnesses just carry on!
Hope everyone is better v.soon!

Welcome kforkitty! How are you finding it?

ALL is your LO on the mend?

My boys are 10months and I still co sleep with them in my bed
They breastfeed throughout the night, sometimes they wake 3/4 times sometimes once, they have a morning nap and a mid afternoon nap and if they don't sleep enough they usually want another nap which makes things interesting

I usually only feed them milk at nap/bed time and once I find a truly leak proof beaker I'm hoping Ill be able to start dropping breastfeeds for bottled ones instead !

LO back at school on 10th and she's forgotten her spellings and doesn't want to learn them again (cue many arguments)
But I did take down the Xmas tree! What a job! And my knitting box was promptly put back in its place but I haven't had time to knit anything yet!

Anyway better go to sleep, hope everyone is well!

Oh Foxtail my upstairs neighbour said the same thing to me! She knocked to tell me she was inviting family over for NY drinks so will get a bit noisy and despite the fact she only has one 2yo and I have a 5yo and twins, she thought I wouldn't be aware I can sleep when they sleep, 'just leave the housework' ....(and my FB?)

Mumof1plustwins I've been lucky to have very easy babies (so far... ) Though they did have nasty chest infections over Xmas, and we had the fun task of giving them antibiotics!
I also have yet to lose my baby weight (though not terribly fussed just yet, I'll get back into running slowly, with the aim to compete in a 10km or two this summer...maybe...

kforkitty Ive lost a bit too much wieght thanks to breastfeeding, once I stop I'll have to watch my weight gain because I know it will rocket :o
I wouldn't worry about wieght just yet anyhow, enjoy the calm before the storm! I'm kidding, having twins is great

Hello and happy new year everyone. Hope you all had excellent festive seasons. Ours was lovely - S&R navigated a tricky path really well and stayed in very good moods with NO CRYING all day despite lots of fuss and overwhelming present mountains. Generally good presents for me though MIL did buy me a simply horrible shortie dressing gown (back in the ownership of M&S now) and a pair of pyjamas, the bottom half of which is fine but the top half was possibly the least flattering ever. Areola showing through gossamer thin material which made boobs look like spaniel ears and showed all spare tyres off. So that's in the bin. Not sure what the obsession with night attire is but every year I get something of that ilk.

So sorry to hear of C's hospital stay ALL. How alarming all round, and it must have been hard to manage. I did laugh at your DH's wardrobe errors though, poor sod.

Glad to hear the big drive back worked out OK LL. How are things going staying at your mum's or would it be impolitic to comment? Same question for LVB as well except insert MIL for mum...

Polka re your DD hating sleep - is it possible that she hates the cot more than the sleep? Just wondering if getting her to spend a bit of time in it while awake and playing with toys might help her to see it as a nice place rather than somewhere she might feel 'abandoned' or something.

And dropping night time feeds - can't remember exactly (maybe 5 months?) but they did it of their own accord so I was lucky. I woke up one morning and practically whooped when I saw the clock! We were still feeding at 10pm-ish as Tarti said until it got to the point where we had to crowbar them out of their cots and also R was being awkward about every single bottle during the day - it turned out she didn't want the night time milk and it was throwing everything else off. Is it possible that your DS is in the same boat? How much milk are you giving him at different times? Perhaps dropping 11pm and upping daytime quantities might help (assuming he takes the daytime bottles once 11pm isn't happening).

Foxtail interesting that you have dropped the morning nap without incident. Is it still going well? I am hoping mine hang onto it for a while as I love my 40 mins in the morning to get things in order. Perhaps if I had babies who didn't need eye contact from me 24/7 it would be different but the opportunities to go to the loo or even make up bottles are so limited!

Hi BB3 and KforKitty. Welcome! BB3 I hope your DS is better very soon. Any idea how long he might be in for? I bet you are concerned for your milk supply - would definitely keep expressing as often as you can bear to.

Here it's not illness or sleep issues but feeding and routine. It is as if R has decided she wants to be a grown up girl all of a sudden. Yesterday she was being really awkward about spoon feeding and being fed from a bottle, having been fine the day before. She had about half the daily milk quantity as a result and almost no breakfast. So having consulted Gina, today I am trying to offer her the spoon straight off and trying not to wince as food gets flicked everywhere and am going to give her 2.30 milk from a cup in her high chair. We shall see. S loves milk anyway but will see if he'll hold his bottle and hope he accepts a spoon a while longer.

I've dreaded the self-feeding stage to be honest - it will surely just take so loooong and be so much more cleaning up! Question: when I read Gina for this stage she's all on about offering a 'selection' of mini-sandwiches and baked potatoes for tea - how the hell am I supposed to do short-order catering when it's all I can do to mash a banana or microwave a frozen portion of something in the time I'm allowed?! It seems that the entire approach for feeding goes haywire at this stage, with method of delivery, texture, presentation, timing and type of food all changing wholesale. Any tips from those who've been through it?

Evening all

I do put mine in their cots for a little play when I'm getting bath things ready/having a tidy upstairs cerubina- DD has screamed when I've tried to have her in our bed so I don't think it's just the cot she dislikes, but I'm not sure! I've just been looking into controlled crying- I have tried to leave her before but only for a couple of minutes at a time before giving dummy/stroking face/comforting in cot (which makes no difference at all) it seems that proper controlled crying entails leaving for much longer and is controversial as some believe it to cause psychological issues? Any thoughts on this?! She screamed so badly tonight- began straight after her bath and massage, tried leaving her for a couple of minutes after her feed but broke my heart when she started again- even when holding her she just wouldn't stop, her voice sounded hoarse and she just would not calm down- took ALOT of rocking and singing to stop. Seriously, she sounded like something from the Exorcist. I know from what I have read that they both have negative sleep associations (our fault with that one!) but I am just at a loss as she gets herself so worked up. We are so bloody tired. Had DS in bed with us from midnight as he just wouldn't sleep.

Seriously, is this screaming normal though?! It is horrendous although she has had 2 good nights until now. Maybe I should just win the lottery and employ a fulltime night nanny!

Sorry for the moaning post by the way

Hope everyone is well!

Hi Everyone welcome to all newbies,

Re: dropping night feeds, my two always woke at 4/5am and I decided to just drop the dream feed at 11pm as it didn't seem to make a difference if I did it or not. Now at 14 months though F sleeps 7 till 7 no problems but V still mostly wakes up at around 4.30am but will go back to sleep in with us until about 6.30am. I'm just hoping she grows out of it as nothing seems to work.

Re:spaced soothing/controlled crying, I did it to a certain degree, I think there comes a point when everyone has had enough. For me it was when they could stand in their cots and wail like banshees. It works and they seem a lot happier for it.

Hope all the poorly babies/children are on the mend. The girls had a very nasty virus early Dec, which lasted 5-6 days very high temperatures, followed by a chest infection, they were on Calpol, baby Nurofen & Amoxicillin . The baby Nurofen comes with a very good syringe so we use that to administer all meds.

I'm wondering when the girls will start walking, they have been cruising happily for months, can climb onto the sofa unaided and generally destroy the home . Had a bit of a meltdown yesterday when V managed to tip a beaker all over herself that she had reached up onto the kitchen table, which I didn't realise she could do. It could have so easy have been a cup of tea whilst F pulled a huge cast iron griddle pan onto the floor, norrowly missing her feet. I spend have the day with my head in my hands, they are currently pulling all DVD'S onto the floor even though I have moved the dining room table against the wall to cover them. The name climb through the chair legs under the table like some kind of commando exercise! I've read that twins are prone to accidents and even though I'm not normally a worrier, i'm getting a bit preoccupied with potential dangers, arrrggghhh

Will write more later as I've been awol too long, lots to say about a healthy New Year and S&B, I'm lucky these days if I shower & brush my hair, let alone put a smudge of make up on

Glad you got here safe LL

Oh Lavita, the DVD scenario sound v familiar! We've reorganised our cds so they're a bit less accessible but honestly, anything on any surface is fair game to be pulled onto the floor in ds2's eyes. In fact, I think he reckons he was put on the earth to fulfill that aim. I seem to have spent the morning clearing multi-bit stuff (duplo, jigsaws) up after they've played with it, only for it to be strewn across the floor again within minutes.

Glad you're back safely Lottie. I was wondering how long the drive would take - yikes! Did the DVD players do a good job of keeping the girls entertained?

I hope ds is feeling better BB3. Apparently it's epidemic here. It's hard being away from the other littlies though I did manage to get to see the boys for a short time each day. At least I didn't need to worry about feeding them.

We're still a little worried about dd. Her breathing & stuff is ok now (though she is stuck with a nasty cough/cold & will be for some time) but she has thrown up a couple of times a day & has had v few dirty nappies. She's also v, v unsettled which isn't like her at all. The only way we've been able to settle her over the last few evenings is for me to take her up to bed & lie with her / feed her. We were warned the antibiotics & antivirals she had last week might upset her tummy so we're guessing it's that but she'll be back at the drs if it doesn't resolve soon.

Boys are waking...

LaVita - how old are F&V now? The phase of destroying everything in their wake didn't last that long for my girls, although I must confess to using CBeebies far more than I should have done for some of that time, as a distraction. Sometimes though we have other children over and as soon as they walk in the door they are whirlwinds, pulling things over, opening any door they can, and it makes me realise that my girls (for good or bad in the long run) are just not like that. Some children really do seem to be balls of indefatigable energy....

Your quote, btw, "I think there comes a point when everyone has had enough" really is so true. Polka - so sorry to hear of your woes with the screaming, it is utterly utterly soul destroying, and to deal with it through a constant fog of tiredness so difficult. DH and I had some of our darkest days in the early months, particularly when one or both of them would be ill and we'd be screaming at each other to be heard, about What To Do, above a screaming child in the middle of the night. FWIW, I do think some children's screams are harder to listen to than others - with us, Juliet has ALWAYS had a very difficult cry, it just seems to pierce the air with its intensity. We found it so hard to listen to compared to Eve, although she cried more it was a classic baby WAAHHH, whereas it always sounded (and still does, age 2) as though she is in GIANT amounts of pain. I am sorry to hear your efforts thus far to crack the c.c./s.s. haven't worked but can only advise to continue, and to have your plan of action firmly in place before it starts each evening, so you know what you decided to do before your ears started to bleed with the noise.

As for us, we're all here and pootling on with it. Had final surveys back re. house and thank GOD nothing much needs doing to it, as I feared my super-aggressive (in these matters) DH would be insisting on money off from the vendors. Now looking at an exchange date of end of Jan, completion mid-Feb. OMG, is this really going to happen? Am I going to have to buy some serious wellies and learn how to cook on an Aga???

Comment: some people on here are so vigilant about your semantics aren't they? I tiptoed into Weaning to ask for thoughts on R's sudden rejection of spoons and got pulled up by 2 posters on using the word "awkward". Jeez. Obviously I should caveat every clause in every sentence when talking about my child's behaviour!

Hey Cerub - just had a look at your thread. I know what you meant... I had real probs with the girls at about 1yr with them getting much more fussy than they'd been before. I did BLW (in the main) so always offered plenty of finger food, actually found it less stressful than trying to get them to eat things they refused. The mess can be is irritating to say the least, but it DOES get better. One thing I read is that it is very common for children to really slow down with the amount of food they take in at about 1 yr, because the rate of their growth really slows too and they just don't need as much. Very common apparently for fussiness to start at about that point. Not sure if that's relevant but thought I'd add it to the mix...

I got it too Cerubina . We mainly did blw too & some days they'd eat v little but had faith in the `food is fun til 1' mantra. It took a fair while for it to feel like they were having substantial meals even after that. Not that it helps answer your Q any...

Ds2 is our distructive whirlwind while ds1 is generally pretty calm with `stuff'. Ds1 was mobile for 4 months without incident by the time ds2 started moving. That very day we had 2 things broken. But he isn't a patch on my friend's singleton dd. I've finally started getting them to help me tidy before dinner so I have less to do once they're in bed in the hope they will learn that it's easier to just not pull everything out to begin with....

& v true about some baby's cries being easier to listen to than others. Ds1 didn't cry a lot but was loud and impossible to ignore when he did. Ds2 cried a lot but not so difficult to hear unless it had been going on for ages. In fact we laughed at his cries in the early days as he'd end crying sentences??' with eh eh ehhhhhh' a la Ann the psychiatric patient from Little Britain. Spose you have to get your kicks somehow... Dd rarely cries - only really if I'm busy with the boys so can't feed her immediately but she's generally attached to me or very close by so we don't hear her much.

Anyone else had this...?

Boys are 10months, recently everytime I go shopping G wakes up and just cries and cries until I pick him up. We leave the house fine, he sleeps, but soon as he wakes he cries?! And he only does this in the pram, his brother is quite the opposite (thankfully!)
I have no idea what's wrong with him.

Mumof1plustwins my DS will cry when he wakes up in a shop as well- I just put it down to him waking in a strange place, being unsure what was happening etc. Also that he wakes up and often won't see me straight away (he does seem to be more sensitive than DD in that respect)

Quick question- have many of you changed pushchair as yours have got a little older? (more lightweight double stroller or tandem buggy)

Hello everyone! All well here, rowing with DH because I'm grumpy and controlling ( I am, but this should come as no surprise to anyone who knows me!) and he's useless... He's fed up at work, we're both tired, sometimes it all gets a bit much apparently. Bit annoying because I've just resigned from my job, which is quite a big deal and I could use some support. Feels a bit like he's thinking he's not very happy, so what am I going to do about it for him. Anyway, pizza for tea later, that'll cheer him up.

Polka we've got a ginormous Baby Jogger double for walks etc as we live in the country and needed a big rugged thing. Used that since they were born. It lives parked in the kitchen, and they have their naps in it (it's like a flippin' cruise liner it's so huge and luxurious). Too big and heavy to fold up and get in the boot easily though, so at about 7 months we also got a lightweight (HA!) double stroller to keep in the car for trips to town etc. It's a Cosatto, fairly cheap and cheerful. Not great for naps but brill for buzzing around and easy to fold up etc.

Mumof1 my DS can't stand shops or anywhere loud/bright/unfamiliar like that, he screams blue murder going in, and it's worse if he's dozy and wakes up in there. DD loves the stimulation, but he gets quite panicky. If we recline him right back in the buggy that seems to make him feel a bit more secure and it's not so bad.

DS's new favourite thing now is handing me things so I'll say "Ta", and give them back to him. He can do it 4000 times in a row and still find it entertaining. Bless. DD's obsessed with putting things inside other things, repeat x4000. They're both doing that thing of trying to crawl in their sleep - how adorable is that!

Oh, and Cerub, was it you asking about naps... DS decided he wanted to be a big boy and drop his morning nap for about, ooh, two days. Then he changed his mind and we're back to exactly the same routine as we were on (30 mins at 9.30, 90 mins at 1.00).

Well, no, he's not useless, that's not fair. He's very good mostly.

foxtail well done on making a decision about work- I hope it works out well for you. I did feel rather scared before handing in my notice but relieved after as I didn't have to agonise over what to do anymore and keep changing my mind. Although I must admit I was daydreaming about being back at work earlier today- adult conversation, lunch break, time away from baby duties in general....

I am with you on the rowing front.... I remember reading when pregnant that how much pressure multiples can put on a relationship and that the divorce rates in parents with twins was higher and thinking it can't be that stressful I think I've mentioned divorce a number of times since having them. I obviously don't mostly mean it but there have been times where we are just so exhausted that we just argue over the most ridiculous things and it really gets us both down.

Knee deep in lurgy here. The twins both had nasty colds over the weekend which they're still working their way through, and meanwhile I have got one of the nastiest sore throats I've had for many a year. Had to do bedtime last night with a temperature of 39.5 and then crawled off to my own bed to shiver and gibber for the rest of the night. I always thought it was hardest to manage when they're ill - now I know it's hardest when you're ill. My DH is just going into a v busy time at work as well and now's when you realise you don't have a support network of friends around in the daytime who have a spare pair of hands - anyone not working has at least one baby of their own, plus you hardly want to pass on germs.

I wonder whether this was part of R's spoon hatred last week. If her throat was sore like this then no wonder.

Hope everyone else is doing OK; babies getting over illnesses, house devastation coming to an end and sleep issues resolving...

Thanks Polka and Foxtail sounds like that's what it could be.
foxtail that is so cute, I do exactly the the same thing with my boys, hoping they'll learn to share?! Haha! A just smacked his brother for taking his toy... sometimes they will give me what they're holding but not always :o
They seem to love eating whatever Im eating which means my sandwich is reduced to nothing after they've 'nibbled' some! :o

Cerubina hope you're all better soon!!

Can anyone recommend a beaker for my boys, I have a couple but they just chuck them on the floor thinking its a toy because of the non spill they don't know they have to suck to get any drink out... my fault entirely as they've only been b/f and I've never persisted giving them a beaker at mealtimes...maybe I should start there then...

haha foxtail - I get the guilts when criticising dp too. Despite all his faults he is great & I feel v ungrateful when I moan. But sometimes he is useless! I feel for you on the job situation - I can imagine it's difficult even if the right thing to do all round. I hope the pizza did the trick.

Sharing - ha! Ours are getting fairly good at it now but it does take a while. Generally V much more practiced than singletons though they share better with one another than with other children. Perhaps sharing the rocking chair wasn't the best today though. Popped into the kitchen & came back to hear dd screaming as ds2 was sitting on her. Ooops

Aha, sore throat could well have be it then Cerubina. Hopefully that mystery solved & I hope you're all better soon. Def agree with coping while ill being v difficult. We all had a vomiting bug just after Christmas last year & remember a 3am where dp was sitting on the floor holding baby while I changed bedding, then a couple of hours later me lobbing ds2 over to dp while I threw up. It was horrendous (but funny looking back). Poor ds1 had it first and was relatively OK by the time it got to the rest of us and the only one up to eating but it was a struggle to make something for him to eat. I think he probably lived on breadsticks or similar for 24 hours......

We just used Tommy Tippee cups Mumof1 but even then it can take some time to get them drinking from them rather than tipping the water everywhere. A friend got her ds used to them by giving in the bath so there was no mess while he learned. We have those cups with the integral straw too (think they were a year or so when I got them). They thought they worked the same way as bottles so took a while to get them to not tip the cup up. We have a new coffee maker so gave the boys milk with a frothy top with cinnamon sprinkles this morning (just like Mummy's coffee). Their faces were a picture! I don't think we'll get away without doing that every morning now. They don't drink milk at all now so not a bad plan.

Polka we have an Obaby double buggy & I wouldn't really recommend. We've only had it a year (were given a double buggy to start with) and it's v hard work to get going initially as the front wheels never seem to quite align properly. Never used to be a problem & will only get worse as boys get bigger. I keep meaning to lock them to see if it helps but I like cornering with movable wheels. I'm debating getting a City Mini but not sure how much more use we'll get from a double buggy...

Mumof1plustwins we use the Dr Brown cups but they are non spill like the ones you use. We originally used Tommee Tippee cups but DS struggled and I struggled getting the flipping lids off Both DD and DS are fab with the DR Brown ones though so will probably keep these for a while

Cerubina Hope you feel better soon, take it as easy (!) as you can

Thanks for buggy info folks, I have been looking at some tandems but have been told they can be difficult to push. I do like having mine side by side, athough it would be nice to be able to push a buggy into people's gates when visiting, and all doors