Life with twins 3

[GibberingGinger]

Like some sort of film sequel, or a royal dynasty, welcome to Life with twins III, a thread for general discussions and sharing experiences of having (or expecting) twins.

Oh not you as well GG. Don't worry, you're ALWAYS allowed to moan on here... it's what we do best Really hope there's an improvement by the weekend. We traipsed off to the docs yesterday (were kept waiting AN HOUR - brilliant fun having two screaming, over-tired, hungry and ill toddlers to handle, whilst having a streaming cold myself) to find J has bronchitis. Have been trying to get to grips with the 'pin screaming toddler down and hold their nose until they swallow' drug administering technique. Hateful.

ALL - hope you coped okay on your own yesterday, you superwoman you.

Those of you with 2+ yr olds, at what age would you say it's normal for your child to 'get' Christmas. The girls (23mo, two in 2 weeks yikes) don't have a clue, I think. I'm not bothered, I think there's plenty of time for those shenanigans and frankly the longer I can stave off them being rampant consumer-robots the better. My niece is the same age as the girls and my SIL emailed me this week to tell me that she is really excited about Christmas, she keeps asking about Father Christmas coming down the chimney, when he's bringing her presents, etc etc. I don't know if this was a veiled way of 'showing off' about her language skills, but frankly we've Skyped with her and it's as much as she can do to say 'hello', so no idea where these vast descriptive skills are hiding . Good grief, don't know what it is about SIL but she drives me a bit mad.

H will be 4 in January and this is the first time she can anticipate Christmas. She is aware that Santa will bring toys and has specifcally asked for Octonauts stuff. Last year she enjoyed the day but wasn't really bothered with the build up. The year before when she was the same age as your girls, she was completely scoobyless. Not bothered at all.

Haha, I think I should joing the non-drinkers corner in reality. I had half a glass of vino when dd was a week old (dangerous - it was tooooooo nice!!!) & only managed a couple of bottles of wine over the last couple of years. Not complaining at all.... but v different to the years previous to that!

GG, sounds like it has the potential to be horrendous so not surprised you're hardly jumping with excitement. Maybe it'll turn out to be one of the best times ever - as sometimes happens when you have low expectations . Your packing / prep arrangments sound very familiar...

Thanks Lottie - yesterday turned out to be lovely . I was going to try venturing out but in the end we just stayed in & cuddled & kissed lots as they were soooo affectionate & funny. Didn't even have to resort to any of the activities I'd half planned. I feel bad saying this, but I feel I've really missed the boys / our routine since dd arrived so it was lovely to be able to spend some time with them on my own (well, without dp/ grandparents) & I think they maybe needed it too. A friend came round in the afternoon so that was lovely too. I did the venturing out today (to the supermarket / Xmas tat shop) & ds2 fell asleep in the trolley. Now there's a first. We have been up since about 4.15am today tho. ds1 seems to have calmed down a bit now, but ds2 has taken over the screaming heeby jeebies at night. It's gotten to the point where I've just left him crying this week after a couple of 2 hour wailing sessions. I figure if my presence isn't going to help him then I might as well leave him to it . Had a bit of a spat with dp over it at 4.30 this am tho as he wanted to go in to cuddle him so we all got some sleep. What is the point of agreeing a strategy if he just gives in to whatever is easier? & he wonders why he can't settle the boys as easily as I (generally)can.

We got' xmas as far as enjoying sparkly, flashy xmas lights / rudolphs / trains etc today. & I bought a first word' xmas book the other day from M&S (£1, bargain) so taught ds2 Santa Claus' and snowman' today so we did lots of pointing out. That's about as near an understanding of Xmas as we have here. I think we'll do decorations this weekend. I'm excited but know it's really just going to be a month or so of `don't touch' ad infinitum. I hope the girls are better soon.

Work sent me another bouquet of flowers today. V v unexpected as they were so generous when I went off on leave! Welcome diversion from it feeling like lunch time at 7.30am though.....

Oh... and this shouldn't be news at almost 20months..... but we have finally dropped all bottles of milk. Poor boys..... now wonder they're unsettled with us dumping all these changes on them at the same time!!

Are they not having any milk now then ALL? My two still have a bottle before bed, and E sometimes has more in the night if I'm being lazy. I don't know when I'm going to stop it - they LOVE their bottle of milk after a bath... it's our favourite time of day.

Girls' birthday in two weeks and I have no idea what to do apart from the fact that I'm having a little party for them at playgroup. I am too shattered to think beyond that, and keep hearing about other better mothers doing more for their children and wishing our circumstances were a bit different. Can't really fit that many people here for a party, and I'm a bit too frazzled to have a big party for them at home. Is that bad..?? Same goes for Christmas, I have NOTHING sorted, not one present, nothing. I must do something about this... perhaps presents can be next week's job, assuming the girls are back at nursery.

Speaking of nursery, they sent me a lovely email last night asking after J's health, and when I wrote back saying we were definitely leaving in a month, I got a long reply telling me what wonderful children they were, and what a good mother I am to them. I clicked on the email during a Skype call to a friend and promptly blubbed as I read it

Must get to bed... just so so bloody tired. All the time. Hope everyone's illnesses are departing and we can all have lovely weekends.

Nope - no milk at all in a bottle. It was the post-bath bottle that has been the last to go. Wasn't really planned & I didn't think it would happen for ages - and I agree, it was a lovely part of the day. We'd all snuggle up & watch ITNG but we've discovered since dropping the bottle that they no longer want to sit & would rather try & play with toys. Not really conducive to wind-down... so now we've gone back to reading books in the bedroom (another change....). Reason we did it was because ds2 threw up a few nights in a row after milk. I think it was cos they only just have a big dinner an hour or so before bed, then have a full bottle of milk - and then dp lobs them over his shoulder to take them up to bed & I think it was that that made ds2 ill. Dp suggested dropping the bottle & given his reluctance to reduce milk feeds thus far , I agreed. Ds1 seems to have barely noticed. Ds2 got really upset the first night when he noticed the bottles weren't where they usually were when getting his pjs on, but hasn't really mentioned it since.

There's your answer from nursery about being a good Mummy! Much more important to be mostly good than to have the best parties / xmas pressies... but you know that really & I'm sure you will have something suitable in place for when it matters. Things would be different if you felt more settled & didn't have to think about moving in a month - eek!

We don't have pressies yet, but did put the tree up today while the boys were napping - yippee! Or at least - dp put the tree up. For the first time ever. Methinks he's a little excited about spending our first Xmas at home. Boys `helped' put the baubles on. & I put a little wooden train stupidly low on the tree so ds2 has claimed that. Then ds1 took me by the hand and led me round.... and round..... and round... and round the tree. For ages. No idea what that was all about. Luckily I had to take to the sofa to feed dd so dp had to take over my role, much to ds1's disgust.....

Hello ladies, hope all is well?
LL I suspected yours sounded like they had bronchitus too :( its horrid, how are they?

My boys are much better and we put up our Xmas tree today much to OHs displeasure. I think he hates Xmas which has depressed me. I get into the whole thing and there's him being all humbug, it's irritating.
Makes me want to not bother at all with Xmas or just kick him out, but DD wouldnt have it
Oh well, better get some sle

did you fall asleep halfway through that mumof1 ?!

How is everyone health wise now?

ALL congrats on dropping the bottles - I know it's been a battle
Love the image of DS1 dragging you round and round the tree.

We haven't put any decorations up yet. Am a bit scared for the tree this year but determined to get one anyway. Just putting it off till the last moment!

Lottie I know I'm 6 months behind you but I really feel it's ok to have a very low key 2nd birthday. Surely anything you arrange is still much more for the adults involved, at that age. I would keep it small.

MUST get some sleep. Love to all - let's hope this week is a healthier one!

PS MM are you there? How was your trip?

Amen to the prayer for a healthier week to come, tarti. Bloody awful colds here (thanks to the friend who believes in sharing germs) - the twins are pouring snot, coughing, rheumy eyes, blotchy skin, you name it. Plus S's bottom is so bad that we were both crying when doing his nappy yesterday. It even looked as if his little perineum had an open wound. The fact that he can't stop pooing is surely the key to the problem, there must be a tummy/gut infection as you rightly said LL, but the doctor didn't seem to respond when I said about it. I'm taking him back today for another look because it's not right that he should have this for 2 weeks and it only getting worse. I've got the cold too and feel shocking, and can't even sleep when I have an opportunity (witness time of this post). Gaaaah.

GG your household of sick people sounds ghastly. Any signs of improvement since? Hope the Christmas weekend went better than anticipated, or at least that you could all sit there and enjoy a really good moan together. Isn't that what families are for?

LL I think your SIL would drive me mad too. Definitely a case of bad competitive parenting. I wonder if she feels intimidated by you doing what you do for 2 at once and ramps up the boasting to make herself feel less inferior? It sounds as though she is projecting all kinds of her own ideas onto her daughter - highly doubtful she can comprehend anything happening in 4 weeks' time! What lovely comments from your nursery too - get them laminated and keep them in your wallet for hard days!

ALL may every day at home with the three of them be so gorgeous. A day of cuddles sounds just the ticket. Interesting to hear you and LL both say the bedtime milk is a nice time of day at your stage. I am getting heartily sick of it right now, as it just takes ages (especially when colds are involved) and is rarely accomplished without one of them crying throughout the other's feed or even from the moment I start to get them undressed. Perhaps I will miss it when it's dropped later...must try not to be too in a hurry for things to change.

Right, back to finger drumming in the absence of sleep...

Oh Cerubina, have a great big hug from me. First things first, how awful that S still has the bad nappy rash. If you can bear it I think you should go back to the docs and demand something to be done about it. As I say, I had this once with J and I cried too... it's hideous, and you feel so bad for them even though you're doing a GRAND job. It must be his pooly tummy, the poor love.

I hope you guys turn a corner really soon with the illness. We're just about better now. There is something really soul-destroying about being ill yourself but not being able to do anything about it to help yourself get better; trudging around after everybody else with looking after yourself at the bottom of the pile of priorities. I think it's the only time with this parenting lark that I lose my sense of humour entirely. (If anyone else can remember other things that send me equally round the bend, pls not to mention them ) It is a tough one though about staying home even if you've just got a cough/runny nose. I am probably a bit like ALL on that front, in that once the fever has gone and they seem to be running around almost as normal, I do take us out and about, although admittedly not around small babies - am careful in that instance. Anyway, winter is a complete bastard and that's that. Am hoping you managed to get some sleep after posting.

Bought a few presents online yesterday, mainly for my (hugely talented and knowledgeable about Christmas) niece and a couple of bits for the girls. Anyone know whether those micro scooter thingies would work for two year olds? Am thinking of getting a couple of those although is that a death wish?! When we get back to the UK am also going to get them a couple of balance bikes. Other than that am selfishly making sure they have a nice new outfit to wear on their birthday (including having bought one of them this frilly skirt - couldn't resist and think perhaps I'm just living my own lack-of-nice-clothes childhood out through them . Will pick up a few books as we're always woefully lacking on that front and think that will do it.

Mumof1 - hope things are better for you too. And well done on getting the tree up! I am also resisting. My mother arrives on Sunday for the week and I'm putting off such onerous tasks until she's here to help.

A day of paperwork re. the house looms. We have decided to drive over in the New Year. If we can afford to do it this way we will also pay the removal company to clean and hand over our apartment so it could be the case that in four weeks time we'll be leaving never to come back!

Hello ladies, hope everyone is well?

Boys are much better, back to their usual selves fighting over toys playing happily!

The shops are chockablock with Xmas shoppers! Tesco were sold out of advent calendars so DD and I made one instead :)

Question; how many presents should I get for DD? Being 5 I wouldn't think many, am trying to aim for 10, is that too many? I just feel guilty that any less isn't enough! I'm mad, boys are only getting 5 between them.

LL how are your little ones?

All a lot better here thanks Mof1. Currently am rejoicing in the fact that J seems to be able to count up to 10... she's a child genius!

GG and Cerubina how are you getting on? Hope you're all feeling better? How's that nappy rash C? A has had a bit of it for a week or two now but not too bad and he doesn't seem bothered by it, plus his poos are near solid again now they're eating food again.

Well off to wrap the (hopefully) last of the Xmas presents! My bank accounts exhausted! Speaking of, went into Barclays today, it's all new and fancy, I felt as though I'd walked into an exclusive rich mans club!

Haha Lottie - you'll have to save that one for a SIL Skype session. Although I guess her dd was prob up to 100 by J's age

Pleased to report our tree is largely intact so far Tarti! A little bare on some of the lower branches at times but there's been no madness of crashing into it or anything. I did invest in some plastic shatterproof baubles for toddler-accessible height branches so they're our not allowed to touch, but not the end of the world if they do' decorations. The boys are really enjoying putting them back on the tree when asked too - quite impressed that they do as asked and can hook the string thing around the branch. <strong>Mumof1</strong> - my dp usually has a bah humbug' attitude to Xmas so this makes a v pleasant change. I did buy some amusing `bah humbug / ho bloody ho' baubles. Kind of ruins my vague colour scheme, but it did make him happy!

Bought xmas pressies for all 3 yesterday so that's them sorted. We've only got all 3 one thing each Mumof1 and plan this to continue as long as we can get away with it for (although the boys will enjoy dd's before she will) though I did buy a felt stocking each & am putting a few little things in there too. & I put in an Amazon order for dp & got my parents sorted.

Glad the littlies seem to be on the mend. The boys are better again here but I threw up last night... no idea what that was all about but I risked a bit of lunch & feel a bit iffy, but mostly ok. Dd is v snuffly with her 1st (or is it 2nd?) cold which is making feeding interesting for her. She was making such a racket in bed last night that I was convinced ds1 was in with us - how that would have worked, I've no idea!

We tried dd on a bottle of ebm last night - she was less than impressed. Thing is I'm supposed to be going to works xmas dinner next week. I was a bit surprised to get a mail asking me to choose my food but it's just a £10-a-head pub thing so I figured I'd choose & pay & then just not go depending on how things were at home on the day. Then I find out boss is paying so now I feel compelled to go. Think I'll have to ring the child-free pub to see if I can take dd.

Sure they won't mind a tiny, ALL? You sound very organised with pressies. I still have a few awkward buggers to buy for, Uncles and the like.
Good news on the tree front. Actually, the nursery have a tree up in the hallway and although they are fascinated by it, they do manage to walk past without mauling it so perhaps I will cave in the next few days.

LL excellent news on the mathematical prowess.

Cerubina are you surviving??

I keep thinking of the fact that this time last year we were under several feet of snow and barely went out of the house for about three weeks, so things could be worse. I've stinking cold now and have done my back in carting the pushchair in and out of the boot, but thankfully the girls only have coughs so far so we've been very lucky. Last year January-March were hellish for us health-wise though. So much to look forward to!

How was your family weekend GG?? Presume you've actually survived?! Hope the boys are on the mend, and DH of course (and that you've escaped without catching anything...)

Our work Christmas do is on Friday, in a bar in town. Think there is a buffet involved but it will be pretty much a drink-based extravaganza, with lots of inappropriate shenanigans . Must go steady as I've got to drive down to my Mum's first thing on Saturday for the weekend. Have a nice dress to wear though, just really should lay off the cake between now and then if I'm to have any hope of looking alright in it...

Right am off to read my Nigella Christmas book and plan for all the dinners I have stupidly invited people over for...

Still alive...just. D is still ill, though at last his temp has gone, just the oceans of snot to deal with now. J started following the same symptoms at the end of last week, and I've also caught it. Feel really sorry for the boys (and myself) as I've now found out that on top of the temp and lethargy they have had a really sore throat. One of the swallowing razorblade type ones. No wonder they were crying.

Will post more cheerfully when well........

Hopefully they / my colleagues won't mind dd going, or else I'll just not go. I feel a bit weird about bfding in front of certain colleagues but I just have to choose my end of the table carefully but then those who will be v keen to meet / cuddle dd are those I'd feel most comfortable with anyway. I don't plan on staying long & hopefully dd will sleep throughout. But what to wear.... think I might need a little shopping trip before then given I am still slobbing around in my threadbare maternity combats....

I'm not really v organised with pressies, but lucky that we have such a fragmented extended family we don't buy for aunts/uncles etc. & since we're not travelling home this year, stuff requiring minimal wrapping/postage costs is my aim!

Wow, dinner parties - go you! I have a few Nigella books but not the Christmas one. I was having a good browse of her website earlier after reading the thread on homemade food gifts. Yum!

Oh no GG! So sad when they can't tell us what is wrong as I reckon the crying is so much harder to deal with than if you know why they're crying :-( I hope you're all feeling better soon

GG hope you're all on the mend soon! My boys are out the woods it seems but G's temp occasionally spikes but I think that's the teething, tooth number 6 is already showing! Whilst his brother only has 3!
At 9 months are they supposed to be trying to crawl? Mine are only sitting and laying...I think they're lazy ;)
OH is quite adamant that the presents I've got aren't enough but as we're not multi millionaires they'll have to do
Illness wise I haven't caught anything substantial since I was pregnant...actually it was at Xmas and I think it's down to the flu jab I got :) tempted to pay for another....

Oh you've reminded me Mumof1 - have any of you been offered flu jabs for the children? A GP friend of mine mentioned a while back that all pre schoolers are supposed to get one but I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be asking for it myself or whether it's even necessary?
I think mine were rolling at 9 months. One might have been crawling a bit. Can't believe I have forgotten this already

GG lots of tea and sympathy to you

ALL nothing so fancy as a dinner party it's more a case of people keep asking us to go out and do nice festive things and we never can because we have no babysitters, so I'm heading them off at the pass by inviting them over. The Nigella Xmas is nice though, someone gave me the Delia one last year and I've just read through it but there was hardly anything I would want to make, whereas lots of guilty pleasures in Nige.

Still sounds impressive to me Tarti must make some effort to have a social life

No idea about flu jab guidelines tho I saw the health visitor for dd last week & talked immunisation schedule & there's nothing different to what the boys had (tho I was asking whether chickenpox was included as I know they keep discussing it). Also, I had the flu jab recently when pg & the boys weren't offered it even tho I had them with me at the time. I didn't have an appt either but our surgery had a big flu jab clinic when I went for an antenatal appt so I was bundled through the door. At the time I had mine, my parents were having to wait due to a lack of vaccine locally so maybe decisions are been made locally

Ds1 crawled at exactly 9months mumof1 (only remember cos it was New Years Day). Ds2 never crawled & even now looks really awkward when he does do it. He was a bum-shuffler when he finally got moving at ~15months. He didn't ever roll either. Which also meant he struggled to get from lying to sitting until his tummy muscles were sufficiently strong to do a sit-up. He was one lazy-bum, but he makes up for it now as he's never still & has to run everywhere.

Spoke too soon about good health here. Poor ds2 was really unsettled last night & we've been snuggled up on the sofa all day today. He does still have a cold, but I think it might be his ears too. He's got a temperature, is very quiet & tearful & just needs loads of cuddles, poor thing. Already been awake as much as asleep tonight.... am thinking he's gonna be in bed tonight.

I have to keep reminding myself all babies develop at their own stage! It's so hard not to feel pressured by what you read though!

No social life here, only hellos and goodbyes to other mums at school there's just no time... and yet there was one this morning telling of the Xmas party she went to last night where she got considerably drunk and slept in her amazing hair do and still has a headache now....

I do have a hairdressers appointment to look forward to before Xmas as OH said hell take boys and DD for me, he's feeling very brave!

Ooh, it's so quiet! The GG household seems to be eventually getting over all the sickness. Fingerscrossed that we don't go straight back into it.

I'm long overdue a contribution to the thread. Radio silence due to ongoing illness, obv. I think we are finally turning a corner like GG, so let's hope it's not just a corner into another bout of colds. My mum helpfully suggested I should keep away from all babies and children until Christmas, but that's the while problem isn't it - after confinement you're absolutely desperate to rejoin the land of the living again! I'm hardly likely to continue sitting indoors alone when I don't have to.

S's bum was finally sorted out by a stronger anti-fungal cream, which seems to have done the trick although it threatens to go red again if we don't keep putting the cream on.

Our achievements here at 9.5 months mumofone are: still no teeth, frantic attempts at crawling from both, S still rolling at all opportunities, also saying "dadadada" a lot grr and R is brilliant now at sitting unsupported and can do it for an hour or something. As you say, keep repeating the mantra that they all do things a bit differently and will all get there in the end. Not always easy though and I certainly have to suppress my inner worrier/competitive mum.

J is clearly a prodigy LL. How did she demonstrate her knowledge - can she count out loud already? Hope the house shenanigans are going smoothly.

When's your work do, ALL? Any word yet on whether you can take dd? I went to my team Xmas lunch last week and not only was it good to see m'colleagues again, it was lovely to be out of the house doing grown up things for 5 hours and I had the best welcome committee when I got home. Little squeals of delight and sucks kisses on the chin. Gorgeous. My return to work is all set for end Feb and nursery is sorted out, so on this evidence I needn't worry tooooo much about it.

Our two have had flu jabs, tarti, but AFAIK it's not routine on the NHS for children to get them unless they have some underlying condition. I asked our consultant last time we were in for a check and she said it would be worth getting one for S because he was on a ventilator at birth, and if he was getting one then R might as well. She wrote to the GP suggesting this but I don't think we'd have been given them otherwise, even though in my opinion with multiples there's a really good argument anyway - if they get flu then you will too, and if you do then no way can you look after them! I keep meaning to get one for myself as well just to close the loop.

Quick skim to catch up has left the impression you are all ill - babies, toddlers and parents. I hope this isn't quite true. My boys are a bit below par - a big day seems to wipe them out at the moment, they are a little bit too easily upset by the other nicking their toys. But a great improvement on previous years. And they have returned to an afternoon nap which is lovely.

We have the biggest Christmas tree in the world (or possibly a slightly small living room), which the boys helped me decorate. I suspect this may be a good age for Christmas - they get the general idea, love the lights and sparkle, but aren't yet on a crazy build up to one day. I do finally see the market for all the tinselly tat - they just adore it!!

Had a good moment today. We were at a soft play centre for a playgroup Christmas party. Alasdair got stuck right in the middle. I could see him, but didn't fancy climbing the stairs (inside a plastic tree) then crawling through a tunnel 20ft in the air (I was wearing a skirt as it was a "party") to go get him. Managed to get Magnus to go over and give him a push to get him up the step. Very proud.

Boys and I now have snow boots (50% off at GAP for them - only popped in for socks!) so I can guarantee no more snow this winter, in Edinburgh at least. PIL are getting the boys a sledge which just confirms it.

Hope everyone gets well very soon - and stays well, that seems to be the difficult bit.