Before I start I am not hinting for foodparcels, loans or any charity as I am a proud woman but I think my family is about to go under. I can't take much more and have been crying with stress for an hour now.

[twinsetandpearls]

As you know we have just moved and coud not sel our house.

We made plans to move before the credit crunch and we were desperate to move.

We agreed to rent the house to my sister and her friend for just under the mortgage, as they agreed to move out if we got a sale and we knew the house would stay nice for any viewings.

a fortnight after siging agreements the other tenant buggered off owing us lots of money ( and my family) My sister could not afford the full rent ( which was subsidised by us so we agreed that she could pay her third ( her house mate had a son so they used two rooms and she used one) This meant we were subisidising her by almost £500 a month. She knew we coud not sustain this and oromised to look for a flatmate, she has not and four months later we are £500 a month down. Our savings have gone on a deposit for our rental house down here and moving costs. We are now sinking.

We should take this girl to court for the money she owes us but we don;t have the momney to pay for a solicitor.

Then to top it all I have had some money taken from my bank and the bank are investigating but seem to be dragging their feet. I have given them a crime number which will speed it up, hopefully.

To top it all our car died and we needed to replace it as once a month my dp has to go back up to Lancashire. So spent his money just before my bank was drained.

Dp gets paid on Friday and until then we have no money. We just about have food. A friend drives me into work and I owe her petrol money, she is now skint so we may not even be able to get into work from Wednesday. We are now one month behind with the council tax as well. My anti depressants ran out last week and I can't afford my new prescription which is probably making things feel much worse than they are.

We are going to have to completely cancel Christmas this year, we were going to visit family and now dd is heartbroken as she can't see her dad, extended family or the friends she left behind over Christmas.

I have phoned the estate agents who are selling the house and they will rent it out but they have said because the rental market is saturated the rent will not cover the mortgage. But we will be subsidising at £100 rather than £500 a month. I know this is going to cause a huge family row when I have to ask my sister to leave the house and I am dreading it.

I know everyone is going to pile in and say you shouldn;t have moved but when we made plans the credit crunch was not big news so we thought, and so did the estate agent ( although they would say that that we would sell). When it became clear that we could not sell I even tried staying in my old job but as my school wa bankrupt they would not give me my job back once my notice had gone in.

I don't even know why I am posting this, I guess I just need to offload.

sorry it has come to this . The ad's, or lack of, may not be helping your perception of the situation.

As far as the house is concerned you do need to be a little careful. iirc your sister and her friend didn't have a tenancy agreement so it may be hard to pursue the arrears or for yout sister to get HB. Also for 3 or more individually let rooms it may become a house of multiple occupancy which has its own regulations. Your mortgage company and insurance would need to agree. CAB can advise the best way to proceed.

Can your dd's dad make arrangements himself to see her over Christmas ?

Hi I havn't rad the other threads, will do later but for now have some links for you (always practicle me you have my sympathy aswell this is not a nice place to be)

www.spareroom.co.uk/

uk.easyroommate.com/index.aspx?gclid=CP_10OWQ8ZMCFQ9KQgodllivzA

Get the house on these two websites, looking for a flat mate for your sister - this may stop family rows. Nothing to stop you trying to rent through the estate agent and the websites.

If you are really struggling with any debts - I dont know all your situations - try phoning these people for specialist help on debt, they are a charity based company and will not make money from your situation

www.cccs.co.uk/

I have spoken to them before on behalf of a family relative and they were extremly good.

LIZS they did have tenancy agreements.

The girl who did a flit is a very young single mum which is why I wanted to find an amicable way to sort it. As much as she has landed me in shit I do not want to hound a single mum.

The housinf benefit situation came about after my sisters friend had done a flit. Sister wanted to only pay her share of the rent but for us to make her a fake agreement saying she was paying the whole lot so she could get housing benefit. I said no there was an argument

Thats right as straight away I said no and was made to feel as if we were being unreasonable. The mumsnet jury straight away backed me up, you are so wise

Sorry you're having such a hard time.

How old is your dd? Is there no way her dad will travel down for xmas?

I am so sorry to hear this I know how it feels and how heavy the stress is. I don't know what to say to help, but I'm thinking of you xx

Prioritise getting the ADs if you can twinset, the LAST thing you need is to go downhill in that regard.

I'm sorry you are in this situation.

Your house that our sister is renting are the furnishings yours ?

If so I just wondered if there was anything you'd be able to sell.

Sorry if you have already said this, btu have you called your mortgage lender and ask for a payment holiday, I know when I worked in life assurance you caould take up to a 13 month holiday but then had to make up all those payments overall, not entirely useful but as you have been good payers and are doing everythign you can they may be able to help, just keep talking to whoever you pay money to and keep letting them know what is going on, phone bills, utilities, tell them and let them know if you will not be able to pay and always try to pay a little if only as a gesture, the one that you must pay is the council tax, never skip on the council tax, so sorry to hear you are going through this I always look out for your posts, we had a minor ruck I think when I was under a previous name an you impressed me ( in the end)

Twinset, if you've never missed a mortgage payment can you ask them for a 1month payment holiday? Most mortgages offer this if you aren't in arrears.

The DH of a friend of mine is a builder and things are really tough for them at the moment. They've agreed a 2mth payment holiday with their mortgage provider and it's made a huge difference to them.

x posts, clueless.

Sorry to hear you are such a bad situation - since you don't want offers of "charity", have you anything you could eBay? Clothes/shoes/DVDs - even if they only bring in a few quid each, it's worth a clearout to get your prescription.

Hope things start looking up and you can get someone paying rent on your house.

OH TSAP I don't know what to say except I feel for your situation.
I really hope a solution comes your way soon. Take care xx

TSAP BUGGEr for you

Can you ask your bank if you can withhold payments for a few months (and explaion the sitaution) or just pay the interest for a few months? It is in their interest to let you do this rather than repossess.

May I suggest that you don't try and rectify absolutely everything all at once?

Just deal with one thing at a time, otherwise you will get completely overwhelmed...

Would your sister mind a housemate? I only ask because my BIL has moved in with us, he pays us £60 per week for our spare room - you are welcome to him if you want him (it is in Blackpool isn't it?)

My dd is 7, it is unlikely that he will travel to see her but I will talk to him.

I will ask about a mortgage holiday, I am sure we have never missed a payment so will definetly check.

Some of the furniture in our old house is ours, the bedroom furniture, dining room and some bookcases. She is using it at the moment so couldn;t just sell it.

But I have got some things together at home to sell on ebay, it won't help this month but we may be able to build a little reserve for next month or to allow a few treats at Christmas.

Why are you so worried wingsofanangel, am now worried there is something else I should be worried about.

ilovemydog I do feel overwhelmed but dp is being great. I am just going to focus on getting my bank account back in the black and he has phoned a letting agent about renting the house out to proper tenants.

Bubblerock it is blackpool. the house is in Bispham. It is on rightmove as it is for sale, will find a link
here we think we are going to drop another then grand off the asking price and have to take less than we bought it for.

The letting agent doubts the rent will cover the mortgage as the rental market is flooded, but we will get more than the £230 a month we are getting now.

I am going to say to my sister that I have spoken to a letting agent and if she can find a housemate before we get tenants she can stay.

Sorry your having a rough time of it twinset but please do let someone help you at least re the ads. Hope things pick up for you soon.

other alternative to a complete mortgage holiday if you are on a repayment mortgage is to switch to interest only.