Before I start I am not hinting for foodparcels, loans or any charity as I am a proud woman but I think my family is about to go under. I can't take much more and have been crying with stress for an hour now.

[twinsetandpearls]

As you know we have just moved and coud not sel our house.

We made plans to move before the credit crunch and we were desperate to move.

We agreed to rent the house to my sister and her friend for just under the mortgage, as they agreed to move out if we got a sale and we knew the house would stay nice for any viewings.

a fortnight after siging agreements the other tenant buggered off owing us lots of money ( and my family) My sister could not afford the full rent ( which was subsidised by us so we agreed that she could pay her third ( her house mate had a son so they used two rooms and she used one) This meant we were subisidising her by almost £500 a month. She knew we coud not sustain this and oromised to look for a flatmate, she has not and four months later we are £500 a month down. Our savings have gone on a deposit for our rental house down here and moving costs. We are now sinking.

We should take this girl to court for the money she owes us but we don;t have the momney to pay for a solicitor.

Then to top it all I have had some money taken from my bank and the bank are investigating but seem to be dragging their feet. I have given them a crime number which will speed it up, hopefully.

To top it all our car died and we needed to replace it as once a month my dp has to go back up to Lancashire. So spent his money just before my bank was drained.

Dp gets paid on Friday and until then we have no money. We just about have food. A friend drives me into work and I owe her petrol money, she is now skint so we may not even be able to get into work from Wednesday. We are now one month behind with the council tax as well. My anti depressants ran out last week and I can't afford my new prescription which is probably making things feel much worse than they are.

We are going to have to completely cancel Christmas this year, we were going to visit family and now dd is heartbroken as she can't see her dad, extended family or the friends she left behind over Christmas.

I have phoned the estate agents who are selling the house and they will rent it out but they have said because the rental market is saturated the rent will not cover the mortgage. But we will be subsidising at £100 rather than £500 a month. I know this is going to cause a huge family row when I have to ask my sister to leave the house and I am dreading it.

I know everyone is going to pile in and say you shouldn;t have moved but when we made plans the credit crunch was not big news so we thought, and so did the estate agent ( although they would say that that we would sell). When it became clear that we could not sell I even tried staying in my old job but as my school wa bankrupt they would not give me my job back once my notice had gone in.

I don't even know why I am posting this, I guess I just need to offload.

preppaym,ent persc ription

Its all very well being proud but don't be daft .... You need your AD's and if someone has some sitting around they can send you (or someone is happy to give you some money for your prescription), then you really should take it. Please... It won't make your money situation any easier, but it will help you to cope with it and you need to be able to do that for your family...

Your sister has taken the piss for long enough by the sound of it.. She may not be happy about it but she can not expect you to carry on with the current arrangement.

Things will look so much more positive once you have you Ad's and you are only subsidising £100 per month instead of £500

Hope you get it sorted

We won't go hungry, we may have to eat the crap in the freezer that we ignore which will do us no harm. I get free dinners at school as I do a duty.

oh twinset - it feels like a mess but you won't go under.

first - get yourself to CAB and look at the website for the small claims court. You don't need a solicitor to pursue the money this woman owes you.

second - talk to your sister. if she's remotely reasonable she will understand you have no choice but to rent it out at the market rate. you've been doing her a favour for a while and it's no longer sustainable. give her a deadline and have a clear conscience.

third - make your prescriptions a priority. think of the gas-mask principle - that you can;t help others (ie your family) if you don;t help/look after yourself first. look at the money saving tips on here and the net and make space for that prescription.

fourth - could you possibly get a small short-term loan from family? once the house situation is sorted and you're not loosing that £500 you can hopefully be sustainable if tight. so perhaps only need a small loan to manage this month and get the care mended

fifth - possibly obvious - but can you drop the house price? (for selling I mean?) do some proper sums - ie the cost of holding out vs the benefits of a quicker sale at a lower price.

and finally - look out of your windows at that amazing view (that I have admired before) and tell yourself you did the right thing, and this current mess will pass.

I hope none of that sounds trite, silly, or anything else it's not meant to be. if so ignore xxx

i have pre payment cert. £10 per month i think for as many scripts as i need

got it after being stung by charges after diagnosis of asthma. neeed steroids, ABs, 2 inhlers and spacer. and had to pay for them all!

I will organise a pre payment as soon as I get paid misdee, money has never been tight like this before so I never bothered.

Twinset, not much to add but I really feel for you. DP and I bought our house together 2 years ago and because of his irregular and my low income, I have various debts and it has put a huge strain on our lives & relationship.

Main thing is to get the mortgage and council tax covered. Inform the council of your difficulties and ask for an arrangement to pay of any council tax arrears in small instalments - most councils will agree to this rather than go to court. Ditto mortgage - could you get a mortgage holiday?

If your sister can't find a flatmate or mates, can you advertise instead? She can choose to stay or leave with your choice of housemates, rather than you depending on her to find 'mates' - her previous choice does not seem to have been a good one .

You can still have a Christmas, but do it on a budget - it CAN be done. One year I had no money for fancy gifts - I made a christmas cake and parcelled it up into small portions nicely giftwrapped. It saved me a lot. Or just be honest and tell people you can't afford gifts, but you'd like to see them anyway, and put the money towards the travel. Do you have far to travel to see your family? Could your DD's father help towards her visiting expenses at least?

Have you looked into getting legal aid to pursue the girl? There may be a free legal advice service in your area, like the CAB.

replace my number 3 with ACCEPT five's offer. it's not a food parcel ffs. it's a prescription. please do it.

TSAP - if you talk to teh bank you should be able to arrange a temp overdraft to cover the money that has been taken from your account, while they complete their investigations. It happens all the time, and it would be a normal request to make in these circumstances.

You are doing the right thing in renting your house in the open market and I am sure your family will understand that you have no other option.

Do you have anything that you have recently bought, clothing, house stuff etc. That is unused as yet, so that you can take it back to the shop and get your money back? This might at least get you your petrol money and prescription money?

We have dropped the house price and we are about to drop below what we paid for it but there is just no movement in the housing market.

The mortgage and rent are always paid, we have never missed a payment. I know we won't go under, or at least I hope not it all just feels so hard at the moment and this was supposed to be our fresh start.

twinset I'm really sorry you're going through this.

We will do a very simple Christmas, we will get dd a little present and have a cheap Christmas meal. But dd was so looking forward to going back to Lancashire to see everyone and have a family Christmas. Last year was so awful I wanted it to be nice.

Haven't read the thread, sorry but would like to post that you are not alone twinset, we are suffering too. I lost half a job but hopefully will find something soon to ride the storm.

((hugs)) Not much to add but it will work out, PLEASE make sure you get your scrip sorted, it is not only making you feel shit but is dangerous to just stop anti-d's , borrow a tenner and pay it back on payday, I know its rubbish and you don't want to but it really is important, and you wouldn't think twice about doing this for someone else would you??

How long ago did you buy the house? We need to move and are going to put ours on for what we paid 5 years ago, and we've done work to it, things are moving but only if they are cheap, check out what new builds are going for, round here they are being marketed at lower prices than resale homes.

I hope it works out soon, and don't feel bad for your sis, you can't afford to subsidise her, end of.

TSAP - much sympathy.

You'll get through this and its good to come on here and have a moan.

Eating your way through the freezer is dull but we're also about to do it - i'm looking at as a good way of clearing it out before christmas so its actually a positive not a negative.

Also thinking positively it means you get to stay in your lovely home for christmas rather than going away.

Your sister will understand once you clarify the figures to her - you are not a charity.

Chin up.

please get your prescription

hugs from me i know how things get overwhelming i am somewhat in the same boat at the moment and a final thing feels like its tipping you over the edge

just hang on in there and things will come ok again

i am just on my 4th week with no boiler so not hot water or heating and my car is dead too

it gets you down but try and find some positives

I am so sorry to hear you are going through this twinset.

I would agree that your priority needs to be your ADs. Please accept some help in getting these at the very least. You can always pass it on when you get back on your feet.

Grr have written a post three times and lost it!

I know we are not alone and I am sure that in reality we will not go under , without wanting to sound like the £65K thread we have a good income and this is just a blip. It just feels very dark right now.

We are just trying to overstretch ourselves paying rent and a mortgage and having to get a replacement car. Moving is also expensive and we are just recovering from that. I have also taken a pay cut to work down here and that is taking some adjustment.

twinset - just wanted to say two things:

• follow all of hatwoman's advice. In particular don't feel bad about your sister.

• accept the help that's been offered here.

Don't really "know" you but your situation has really moved me and I truly hope you can find a way through it.

Twinset, so sorry to hear this. Please will you email me on teapotofchocolate at googlemail dot com if you have a minute.

The bank have covered what has gone missing, there was a huge payment that went out and they have clawed that back.

There were some other payments for mobile phone top ups that came to £100 and they have authorised an overdraft to cover that, but they only did that this afternoon, I have only just realised that as they left a message on my mobile saying it had been approved. So that is one thing at least.

But because they have charged me for something from the previous month I have gone over that temporary overdraft and they wont extend that any further.

My sister was supposed to pay her rent on the 1st, on the 3rd it had not arrived so I asked her where it was she said she had transferred it in using her online banking. I checked with my bank the follwing day and there was no record of the transfer. So I phoned my sister again and she said that because it was the first transfer to my account from hers it would take 5 days so she would transfer again and it would be immediate. That would mean we would get 2 months rent in one go which would dig us out of a whole and she could use all her December money for Christmas. The second transfer went in on the 4th, although according to my bank it was not a transfer it was paid over the counter. But the original transfer is not showing, and my bank are saying it does not exist. Well all week I have been thinking another £250 was about to clear in my account which would see us over until Dp payday but it is starting to look as if the original transfer never happened or she has sent it to the wrong account.

Thankyou squeaver, that is very kind. My situation is moving me at the moment but not in a good way