Can only marred couples answer please.

[Richesme]

After my last posts about my husband wanting to go halves in paying bills rent etc when I start working full time, I’ve sat down with him and even though we had a disagreement about going halves, he eventually said, you can keep all your money to yourself and do your own spendings or savings from there.

He doesn’t believe that couples either put all their money in one pot or go halves in proportionate to their wages. His works in the bank therefore tells me that he has many customers come in to open joint accounts and they go halves.

I want to find out as married couples, how do you guys manage your money, bills, rent, mortgage, spendings, savings and investments?

Separate accounts that our wages go into, joint account that dh puts money in for me to use on food shopping and stuff for the children. I was a SAHM for six years when dc were little. I now earn a tiny wage whilst dh is on six figures.

I have no savings and a pittance of a pension (I'm mid forties). DH is a saver, but still managed to pay the mortgage off a couple of years ago (house in joint names). He deals with all bills and finances. We do talk about big spends like holidays together, but I have no idea how much money he/we have at any given time. It doesn't sit right with me but not a lot I can do as it's been like this for over 15 years and he won't change.

Been together nearly 40 years, through working times and then retirement, we have always had a joint account in which we put an equal amount which covers, mortgage, bills, food, house maintenance etc. whatever is over is up to the individual to spend as they see for. But extras for holidays, projects etc. is shared usually equally. But I ended up earning more than my husband, I worked in banking and he in teaching, so if I wanted us to do an expensive holiday that he couldn’t afford I’d pay for us both or pay a bit more. Always worked for us.

We had separate accounts for our wages, we then put the same set amount in a joint account for bills, mortgage, household expenses. I was very much in the paying equal regardless of who earnt more camp.

From The day we married, 1 Joint account with both wages paid in. We have been married 30yrs and for first 15 he was the higher earner (I did the kids - working still but not able to progress as much). Now it has completely flipped to me being highest earner. We never even considered keeping separate accounts. We are a team.

1st marriage - separate accounts but bill account we put into
2nd time fully joint accounts
theres No right or wrong here it’s whatever you both agree on and trust to be right

I earn a third of what DH earns. I work part time. We have own accounts and savings but also a joint for bills. I contribute a 3rd proportionally for our outgoings. Wouldnt expect me to put anymore in. We don't qualify for any benefits (CB included). Ultimately though it's all our money.

We keep separate accounts for spending independence. He also knows I cover most expenses for DC. I will buy their clothes/uniform/shoes from my account and not the joint account. Its mainly cos I wna dress them and myself however I want. I don't want or need the scrutiny or to second guess myself. It also means if he wants his 2000th DVD I don't care.

DH earns four times what I do so puts four times into the joint pot. The rest of our monies are for us to spend or save as we wish. He is a spender. I am a saver. So if he wants to spend £100 on a shirt, no discussions or checking needed as it doesn’t affect me. I kept my inheritance. He kept his.
Worked well for over thirty years.

No of course I don’t - it’s our money. Buying a new car gets discussed, but in terms of clothes, girls holidays, treatments etc., no I would never check and he doesn’t either. But this probably wouldn’t work if you and partner had wildly different views on money .

That’s great that it works for you - and probably makes more sense in second marriage with no kids - think I’d be the same as I wouldn’t want someone else taking from our children. But don’t make the mistake of thinking that if do something differently- like you share bank accounts, someone is checking what you spend! Husband and I love and trust each other - never check what the other person is spending or question it - why would we?! I wouldn’t have married someone with wildly different spending habits and I wouldn’t want to live with someone where we need to split the bill at dinner! Each to their own!

Joint account, all bills paid from it by my husband but only my husbands salary is paid into it. I dont spend from the joint account. My salary goes into my personal account which he has no access to. His suggestion not mine!

We have separate accounts but the majority of spending is done on DH's credit card (full amount is paid off from the account his salary goes into). I just spend as I normally would and don't think too much about it. He never queries my purchases and rarely even looks so I don't have to ask or justify my spending. Obviously I don't go crazy enough to hit the card limit (5 figures) and everything I spend is comfortably within the household budget.

Day we got engaged we opened a joint account to save for our first home. I was at uni at time & he was working. We've had a joint account ever since (just celebrated 20 years marriage) and all wages go in then divvied up between bills and spends. What his is mine and what's mine is his. Everything that comes in the house is split 50/50.

I get that we may be unique/ very old fashioned in this

Both of our salaries went into a joint account and then money was transferred to separate individual accounts for ‘spending money’. He got more than me because he worked in London and his everyday expenses were higher. DH, by his own admission, was useless with money so I managed the joint account and he didn’t make any large purchases without running it past me first. It sounds controlling but it kept us out of debt!

We each put in a percentage of our salary into our joint account which is used for household bills and expenses. The remainder we keep in our own personal accounts. Things like holidays we tend to go halves on.

Day we got engaged we opened a joint account to save for our first home. I was at uni at time & he was working. We've had a joint account ever since (just celebrated 20 years marriage) and all wages go in then divvied up between bills and spends. What his is mine and what's mine is his. Everything that comes in the house is split 50/50.

I get that we may be unique/ very old fashioned in this

Our wages are paid into our individual accounts, we then pay 90% of that into a joint account to cover everything for our family. That means it’s proportional and we still have our own money to do what we want with. We kept thinking we could reduce to 80% or 75% so we’ve each got more ‘fun’ money, but cost of living, kids, etc all means that we struggle a bit with 90% covering the essentials! We’ve done it like this for about 15 years and it is an easy way of preventing arguments

Wages into separate accounts.
Joint account for bills only, pay in same amount per month.
Separate savings.

Married 12 yrs
Together 18 yrs
Mortgage
1 child

Its so interesting reading all these replies. I had very bad experiences in my past and felt totally trapped (and I was) with a joint account. Don't want to go into it. My now husband had a very controlling ex wife who managed their joint account and gave him £5 a week for himself. Wont go into the ins and outs of that either!! Basically we have been together over 30 years, in the beginning my husband earned more so paid out for more bills (including maintenance and child maintenance) and I had a child so it seemed fairer we sorted ourselves out at first, so I paid for all extras including food, he paid for bills. Now I am the main breadwinner, I pay everything except for my DHs car. He is now retired. and yes we still have seperate accounts. But I have never felt that we didnt share and it has made me feel much safer and settled. There are many reasons why couples choose different routes.

We don't have a joint account, we split this bills in half and he transfers his share to my account, then the direct debits come out of my account as I'm the higher earner. As long as the bills are covered, we each can spend or save the remainder as we see fit.

As long as the bills are covered, we each can spend or save the remainder as we see fit.

I think the key here is having a couple who have very similar (identical?) saving and spending habits. This is where dh and I fall down. He is very much a worrier and saver (errs on the side of caution and can often come across as tight) whereas I am very much "you only live once, enjoy the money whilst you're young" (but can sometimes be overgenerous). Combination of life experiences and personality I guess.

Sometimes I think it's good to be different and balance each other out, as long as both are happy.

Exact same set up here . Once the kids came along and you essentially trust each other with your life it made sense that we would pool our earnings and have one account to cover everything. We then transfer £200 into our personal accounts each month.

Salaries into individual accounts, then transfer money into joint account for household bills and family expenses. Transfer is proportionate to income.

We share everything. All the money goes into one account and comes out from there. Savings are in a shared account too. We each have a credit card for online spending and for any birthday and Christmas presents we buy each other. We both have the same outlook re spending and neither of us splurges. We discuss larger hobby-type purchases.

We're the same, he's the saver and I'm the spender, although I do have rainy day/emergency savings. It works well for us and we never argue over money, leaving the lights on is another matter...

When our children were younger and I worked part time, we had 1 pot, it was easier. Over the last couple of years we now earn a similar amount and now pay 50/50 for bills. Salaries go into our own accounts and we each sent half the bill money to our joint account. We have a separate joint food shopping account, and for any events we each pay a similar amount into an account. It works well for us now.