Father-in-law wants to gift my husband a house – in my husband's name only

[esgill]

My husband's parents have been undergoing a painful divorce for the past five years, arguing via their lawyers about the financial terms.

Now, my father-in-law contacted my husband to say he wants to give him money to buy a house – on the condition it's only in his name. My husband argued over this – but his dad basically said his way or the highway. He says it's not about trust but what else is it – I guess he's disillusioned after five years of legal battles.

Our question: how enforceable is this, actually? His father is abroad, in another continent. We're married, without a pre-nuptial agreement (though we got married abroad, I wonder if we'd need to do anything to legalise it here?

Otherwise, my husband said we could change the contrast so it's in both of our names. (is that easy to do?)

We have a young daughter and I have no intention of leaving my husband unless he does something insane like cheat on me. We've been together now for 10 years and know each other for a further four when we were friends. But I want security, for me and my daughter.

100%. Theirs is just a bad take unfortunately -- morally and in the eyes of the law.

I think he is essentially seeing it as money to be extracted from his inheritance. This at least is being agreed with MIL's solicitors, if nothing else.

And yes, we agreed we will change the ownership after buying!

Get your husband to accept the offer and buy a house as soon as you’re able (before fil changes his mind or researches it more). It’ll be a marital asset so there’s no urgency in name changing etc, just get yourselves the house!

FFS. We pooled everything. I wish I'd seen that stupid autocorrect earlier

What’s to stop your husband adding your name to it once he’s bought it? It’s his to do with as he sees fit.

Yes he’s going to do this! I didn’t realise how easy and affordable doing this is.

Maybe point out to your FIL that it's irrelevant who's name the house is in, in the event that you and husband divorce (which is presumably what he's concerned about). If that were to happen you would still get 50%. He's acting in a horrible fashion towards you!!

Hi op,

His dad can give what he wants and you can’t say nothing about it I am afraid.
Is it fair? No
Is it nice? No
Does it create imbalance? Yes
Can you do something? No

Do not interfere or you will be blamed and for good reason. Just stay out of it all.

I hope your relationship will be stronger through this.

Good luck 👌🏻

👏🏼

It doesn't matter if it's in his name only as being husband and wife you are one financial entity in law and if you divorce you'd be entitled to half. Your fil likely doesn't realise this. It's different however, if the money or house is in a blood line trust, in this case the money and property will be your husband's only and can be passed to his children. In this case you'd be excluded from benefiting the money.

Hello. Lawyer here. Once the money has been gifted to your husband, it is his to do as he wishes.

The only way I could think that your husband would be bound to buy a house is if he signed a contract with his father saying that the money was to be given for the sole purpose of buying a house in your husband‘s name only.

Therefore, as above, once the money is gifted, it is for you to do as you wish.

My advice is in practical terms, accept the money, and then pretend you’re taking 2 to 3 years to find the perfect house to buy. Then he probably would’ve forgotten about it. Or you can just tell him it was gifted money & you’ve decided not to buy a house with it.

If the OP's husband died the estate would go to the OP anyway as they are married ( especially if thecDH had a will ( not seemingly suggested by the fil) and if they divorced its a marital asset, so the fil can say what he likes ( rude git that he is, as the OP is the reason his son has a visa) and DH can honour his wishes and it will make no difference surely?

That wouldn’t be an issue though presuming you are actually married. If you are very confident you will stay together why worry if the house is in your husband name. That way your husband doesn’t need to refuse the gift or lie or mislead his Dad. On Mumsnet you often see threads where controlling parents give adult children large gifts that have hidden conditions or that result in guilt trips and manipulation. This isn’t what is happening here. The FIL wants to ringfence his money and ensure it goes to his own child. He has been clear about this. He isn’t being sneaky about it.

Probably best that she doesn't, or he might change his mind about the gift.

It is to be hoped your inlaws live another 7 years at least, otherwise your DH might be paying gift tax on the money.

How would the uk gov know? It’s coming from another continent…

Buy the house in his name and then he can change the names via a deed of gift with a solicitor. The father would never need to know.

Why are you asking MumsNet this kind of thing??? 🤷🏻‍♀️ Fgs ask a solicitor! Get proper legal advice.

I think that’s fine. If my mum or stepdad could afford to buy me a house they would definitely have something in writing to say it’s only mine.
You could always arrange something between yourselves so you have something financial just for you if something happened.

It's up to the person executing the estate to declare. There is little enforcement but it is an offence to lie so depends on your honesty!

If the fil lives and dies in another country, then his estate will be subject to the laws of that country. For all we know, there might not be such a thing as inheritance tax in that country.

if your have been legally married (overseas probably was legal, but you might want to confirm) for longer than 2 years then the divorce will start at the assumption of 50/50 irrespective of who is the legal owner of each martial asset.

FIL can think what he wants, but it only matters if you divorce and by then his preference is irrelevant, the court will decide who gets what.

If you never divorce then make sure husband has a will that deals with him going first and what happens to the house

There is NO GIFT TAX in the UK.
A UK resident will never have to pay tax to HMRC on a gift

Good point, the whole issue of UK IHT is irrelevant if he isn't British/ doesn't have UK assets.

Doesn’t matter if it’s only in his name. If you’re married it’s 50% yours unless you sign a contract - like a post-nup in your case - that says otherwise. And even then, after five years or so it’s considered out of date and unenforceable unless updated.