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Original poster

How difficult/easy is it to get an injunction/restraining order after sexual assault?

140 replies

assdoc · 18/05/2008 15:23

DD1 (13) was sexually assaulted by an older boy from school whilst travelling home from school. The boy was arrested, admitted to the offence, he was convicted and reprimanded by the police. I was confident that school would expell him and DD would be able to return to school and try to put it behind her and move on with her life.

I was stunned when last week the head master phoned to say he'd decided the boy could return to school and did so last Friday.

I'm doing everything I can think of to make the school/governors etc see sense and in the mean time DD is staying at home.

Would it be realistic to try to get an injunction with powers of arrest that would make it impossible for the boy to be in school with DD and if so how do I go about it?

DD is genuinely terrified of the boy and I feel like the school have totally turned their back on us in favour of DDs attacker who just happens to be the son of a GP and in the Gifted and Talented set.

Any suggestions?

OP posts:
Original poster
assdoc · 21/05/2008 20:04

Well...........I had computer probs yeaterday, so I wasn't able to tell you that I had a phone call from the Director of Education! I'd been in touch with her secretary to get contact details and she passed a brief outline of our situation to the Director who then rang me.

I got a very sympathethic hearing indeed. She was shocked to hear that this isn't the first incident that the school had deals with in the same shabby manner. She said she was going to contact the head this week and get him to explain himself and then get back to me.
So that's a huge relief. At last, someone on our side.

DD wrote her letter to the head. It put a huge lump in my throat. She wrote in such a mature way about how she felt let down by the people she thought were there to help her. Bless her. I hope the head reads it and feels even the slightest stirring of guilt. (He's Catholic after all so guilt comes naturally to most of us!)

I'm expecting a call back tomorrow from the Sergeant who dealt with the boy. I rang for clarity (again) on the type of conviction/or not the boy received. The officer I'd dealt with was on holiday (I think they must all have gone away together, everyone I need to speak to is away some-bloody-where)and the officer I did speak to was also shocked when I explained that DD was sat at home while the boy was happily ensconced in school.

OP posts:
Original poster
assdoc · 21/05/2008 20:10

vonsudenfed, I hope I don't have to resort to using the press or a lawyer to make them do the right thing but I'm very much prepared to do so.

I intend to just ride the storm for now, wait until I had the chance to put my proposal to the family (baisically, leave or else) and then act accordingly. People keep saying what about DDs privacy but sadly that was lost on the day all this kicked off. Obviously DDs name would be kept out of the papers etc but it wouldn't take a genius to work it out.

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Original poster
assdoc · 21/05/2008 20:43

Thanks again to you all for your advice and support. If only people in RL were as helpful!

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vonsudenfed · 21/05/2008 20:51

That's really good news - I couldn't believe that no one was on your side at all. The whole situation is beyond belief.

Do you also think there's an element of sexism in here as well as sweeping under the carpet. Boys will be boys, they all do that kind of thing. I can't think of any other reason why your dd is effectively being punished while he isn't.

Good luck, and let us know what happens.

CombustibleLemon · 21/05/2008 20:52

So sorry that your poor DD is going through this. Hope that you get some positive result from the Director of Education soon.

Original poster
assdoc · 21/05/2008 20:59

I think a big factor in this is the fact that the boy is gifted and talented and the son of a GP whilst DD had a medical condition that puts her at the oposite end of the educational spectrum and comes from a very ordinary family.As such the boy is very valuable to the schools league table status and DD is a detriment to them.

Perhaps the head and the boys father share funny handshakes?

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CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 21/05/2008 21:24

tut

if thats the case,the head should be ashamed of himself

Heated · 21/05/2008 21:49

I think the head is just weak unfortunately.

Glad the Director of Education is on the case and your dd's letter is just the right approach imo.

You're right about the Catholic guilt. Isn't the phrase: don't, but if you do, confess as soon as possible?

SmugColditz · 21/05/2008 21:51

threaten them with the children's act 1989

Original poster
assdoc · 21/05/2008 22:24

Oooh. Just googles the children act. It's 70 odd pages long!

Can you give me a summary of it and how it'll help please?

OP posts:
SmugColditz · 21/05/2008 22:38

arggggh

I can't actually, I don't know it, but I do know that every child under 18 has the right to an education, and i assume that means an education free of harrasment!

vonsudenfed · 21/05/2008 22:39

Oh I know what I forgot to say too. It might be worth checking whether your household insurance includes any legal cover. If it does, you may well be able to get some advice for free - and I think a legal opinion would be a good card to hold right now.

oops · 21/05/2008 22:42

Message withdrawn

BetsyBoop · 21/05/2008 23:03

just looking at the Every Child Matters stuff here (part of the Children Act 2004.

it states every child has a right (enforceable by law) to

"Stay safe
Safe from maltreatment, neglect, violence and sexual exploitation
Safe from accidental injury and death
Safe from bullying and discrimination
Safe from crime and anti-social behaviour in and out of school
Have security, stability and are cared for
Parents, carers and families provide safe homes and stability"

BetsyBoop · 21/05/2008 23:19

have you also tried the "Local Safeguarding Children Board"?
info here

details of local chair here

BetsyBoop · 21/05/2008 23:27

also checkout this

it seems clear from this that "Child sex offences committed by children or young persons" under Section 13 of the Sexual Offences Act 2003 means that he is deemed a ?Risk to Children?

& it says "Cautions and discharges for the offences listed above will apply"

thought it might be a useful reference when you get to speak to the police officer

You can probably tell by the fact I keep on coming back to this that it's really bugging me! I hope at least some of what I'm posting you find useful...

BetsyBoop · 21/05/2008 23:53

Also this the catholic churches own guidelines on dealing with sexual abuse

I'm not saying I agree with the tone of this, but here is a quote which demonstrate that the school has NOT followed this

"5.3 Those children and vulnerable adults who have been abused in any way need to be, and know that they are, a special concern for the Catholic Church. It is to the Church that they should be able to turn for a safe haven. If they cannot, if any Christian community is found to be, as an institution, incapable of ensuring the safety of children and vulnerable adults in its midst it must be a scandal."

Original poster
assdoc · 22/05/2008 19:21

Wow Betsy you have been busy! Thank you so much for taking the time to do this. They are all very useful links. I'll take my time to digest them all later.

Had a letter from the chair of the board of governors today. She said that the head will not be replying to our letter in writing as we requested! WTF????

I took copies of all our corespondence so far into the Director of Education so she can have the full picture of what's going on on both sides.

We'll be requesting all documentation pertaining to the incident from school under the data protection act tomorrow. I'd like to see the head try to ignore that one.

Oops, I'm thinking long and hard about involving a local MP. He could (if he's sympathetic) be VERY influential. I don't want to say too much as it would identify who and where we are...................

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vonsudenfed · 22/05/2008 19:37

I suspect - and very much hope for your sake - that the fact that they won't reply means that either they have realised they may have made a mistake - and don't want the evidence out - or are being leant on hard from above, or both. Can you ask them why not?

I really would go for your MP; you have nothing to lose in involving them, and everything to gain.

BetsyBoop · 22/05/2008 20:10

just wondering if you could also ask for information on any similar cases/incidents in the history of the school under the Freedom of Information Act?

I would definitely involve your MP unless there is a valid reason not to. I used to work for a government dept & MPs letters have the knack of getting things moving (and quickly) where all other means have failed

BetsyBoop · 22/05/2008 20:14

just thinking FOI could also make it easier to access info on your DD's case, for example if there was a meeting to decide on what would happen to the boy (eg governors meeting) then under FOI you could ask for a copy of the minutes, whereas I don't think they are obliged to give that to you under the DPA.

CarGirl · 22/05/2008 20:28

I wonder if the head won't be replying because he has not followed procedure and they are frightened he is going to muck up further and write something that you can jump on & sue them for!

I hope you get somewhere with this very quickly.

Original poster
assdoc · 22/05/2008 21:34

ohh. I didn't look at it from that angle. I was just assuming it was yet another example of his supreme arrogance.

OP posts:
BetsyBoop · 22/05/2008 22:01

must agree with the others, myu first thought was "he doesn't want to put anything incriminating in writing"

zoggs · 30/05/2008 19:45

Any news assdoc? How is DD?