Bruv is selling his branding expertise. If you're, say, a coach, random purveyor of woo or a bot and you want to blend in to the massive crowd of coaches all coaching each other, bots all selling to each other or purveyors of woo all being ignored then Bruv can give you a website that ensures your privacy. With his talent you can be sure that, just like Yawn's beige on beige, you will be invisible.
He's offering to crack open a new box of pink or nude colouring pencils to create the classic woo coach look. Any visual cliche you want to include, he will work it into his design and add some more. He can help with the wording to ensure your website says nothing at all. He can even help with the name so if your name is, for example, Emmeline then he would come up with something brilliant like Empower. I'm tempted to employ him and tell him I'm a coach called Cnut and ask for his expertise about what to call my bizniz.
He can take the snappy snaps and videos for your coaching website which is a really simple formula: all you need is a parent or two parents to bank roll you so you can spend all day fiddling about to get the perfect backdrop. He can also take headshots with a giant mug or a pastel coloured laptop you don't know how to turn on, and suggest props such as children (if you can't remember where you put yours you can use other people's). The only rule is that the style needs to be what everyone else does, it's that simple. He wants the word "simple" to be at the front of your mind when you think of him.
He can do all this in 20 minutes apparently so he must be good! It would take me 20 minutes just to find my colouring pencils and pack of Comic Sans Letraset!