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Original poster

How will I get a mortgage?

74 replies

lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 19:28

Hi everyone

First up I'd like to ask that you're all kind to me. My father passed away a few weeks ago and I am building up the courage to leave an abusive marriage.

The thought that goes round and round my head before I leave my marriage is how on earth will I be able to get a mortgage?

I have a daughter under the age of two, and am a SAHM at the moment. I will have child maintenance and a deposit of 230k, but i can't get a mortgage without a job so how on earth will I be able to house my daughter and I without renting?

I will obviously get a job in due course, I currently have a very small business from home.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? I have a high deposit, high child maintenance which I am so grateful for - however I just don't know where to start. Shared ownership? Help to buy? What can I do?

Thankyou

OP posts:
LawnFever · 03/10/2021 19:32

Where are you looking to buy? Could £230k get you a home bought outright so you don’t have to worry about a mortgage for now?

Even if it’s somewhere you could be for a few years, and think about moving in a while?

Original poster
lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 19:34

I'm looking to buy where my mum lives so I have some support. But the average house price there is well above 230k and i can't even afford a flat there 😞

I've even looked at relocating all together, just to be able to afford a hoise

OP posts:
Tealightsandd · 03/10/2021 19:42

With a very high deposit, you might be able to get a mortgage. It won't be as easy but it's not impossible. Use a whole of market broker.

You could also look at Help to Buy or Shared Ownership. If you do, make sure you do your research first. They have their cons ( hence the need for research) but they can be, depending on your circumstances, options worth considering.

JSL52 · 03/10/2021 19:42

Would it be possible to stay with your mum until you get a job?
Or I'd relocate -how far would you need to move to afford a two bed terrace ?

Tigerwhocameforsupper · 03/10/2021 19:45

I would relocate. £230k could get you a 4 bed detached in the Midlands!

Original poster
lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 19:46

I'll do more research into shared ownership, and will look into help to buy as I haven't done that yet. I didn't think they'd even consider me without a job.

I could potentially stay with my mum while I search for a job, however I'll only be able to work little hours as I need to care for my daughter and nurseries are so expensive

OP posts:
Tealightsandd · 03/10/2021 19:48

Would your mum (or your ex) be able to be guarantor for your mortgage?

Jasmine11 · 03/10/2021 19:49

Whereabouts in the country do you want to move to? Maybe posters could suggest cheaper areas with the same kind of vibe you are looking for, or maybe cheaper areas near your mum that you might not have considered.

Original poster
lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 19:50

My ex could be a guarantor for the mortgage.

Another thing I should add is I haven't worked in years 😞 as with my husband we are fortune that I've never needed to. How will anyone want to employ me? 😞

OP posts:
Original poster
lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 19:50

Sorry, I should say soon to be ex - not ex

OP posts:
SpamIAm · 03/10/2021 19:51

I don't think using your abusive soon-to-be ex as a guarantor is a particularly wise suggestion.

Original poster
lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 19:53

He has already said he would be, as we're currently stuck in the cladding issue we can't sell our property at the moment to release funds for a property for my daughter and I

OP posts:
3luckystars · 03/10/2021 19:53

You should get a job anyway, even a part time one.
if you are living with your mum and most of it goes on childcare, the money is coming in and you can apply for a mortgage after 6 months. The nursery costs are not forever.
Little steps in the right direction.
Good luck.

3luckystars · 03/10/2021 19:54

Of course you can get a job. You will need one if you are a single parent.
You can do it.

Mammaaof · 03/10/2021 19:57

Please don't use your abusive ex as a guarantor ffs!! What stupid advice to give

Tealightsandd · 03/10/2021 19:59

@SpamIAm

I don't think using your abusive soon-to-be ex as a guarantor is a particularly wise suggestion.
He should provide financially for and house his child.
Vancouverorbust · 03/10/2021 19:59

Where has the £230k come from?

Original poster
lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 20:00

It's the money left to me from my father.

OP posts:
LawnFever · 03/10/2021 20:02

@lollypop29

He has already said he would be, as we're currently stuck in the cladding issue we can't sell our property at the moment to release funds for a property for my daughter and I
If you can’t sell your property where is the £230k coming from?
Tealightsandd · 03/10/2021 20:02

Obviously shouldn't use the ex if OP needs to keep her new address secret from him but she hasn't said that.

Anyway as I said, she has a high deposit and might be able to get a mortgage in her own right. Especially once she has a part-time job.

LawnFever · 03/10/2021 20:02

Sorry cross posts

Vancouverorbust · 03/10/2021 20:02

@lollypop29

It's the money left to me from my father.
Tricky. So if you are still married he has a claim on the money. What is his pension provision and how much equity if the flat you can’t sell?
Original poster
lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 20:04

I've spoken to a solicitor and they've said to me he can't claim any of my inheritance, I also won't be due to receive it until early next year and by this point I'll have left my husband

OP posts:
Original poster
lollypop29 · 03/10/2021 20:04

There's around 350-400k equity in the current property, but the property is his not joint

OP posts:
gogohm · 03/10/2021 20:05

You could get a shared ownership or move somewhere cheaper- you can buy outright in much of the country eg I live close to a major section city and it's possible to buy a 2 bed house for around £200k (you'll need money for costs and furniture possibly)