Need new bedroom but can't move

[lostitall]

Hi there. Have a real dilemma in that we have a three bed with three small rooms. The two same sex kids can't share a room as big age gap but the room is also too small to divide. We can't get a remortgage or loan at present but my son desperately needs a bedroom of his own. What can we do? We have equity in the house- would the council offer us something?

No they won't. You are adequately housed and an age gap is no reason for them not to share. In the real world siblings sharing is often a nightmare. If I have to move to a 2 bed house (I rent) my plan is to sleep in the lounge.

I don’t think the council would give you a house as you

• own a house
• have equity in a house
• would class same sex siblings as ok to share until they are 16 or 18

Options are

• sell and buy a 4 bed
• move to a cheaper area and get a 4 bed
• if you room is bigger can that be divided and you have the smaller room
• look on internet for inspiration for ways of dividing room - bunk beds with opposite side screened off etc
• someone has dining room as a bed room if you have a seperate room
• loft conversion
• You sleep in lounge
• some sort of caravan/purpose built wooden cabin in garden for older child who I assume just be mid teens I’d age gap is too big to share?

We have a conservatory but unsure if that could be used as a bedroom?

Could you have a loft conversion? We had one last year which saved us a fortune in not having to move. When we were little and my mum and dad had this issue they converted the garage into a bedroom for my brother - that would probably be cheaper.

Do the same sex children have the biggest bedroom?

A conservatory can be a bedroom depending on temperature stability.

What makes a bedroom?

Start with safety in terms of fire exits, being able to get to young kids in an emergency etc.

Add in enough room for a bed. Bonus for room for belongings but you can get creative with that.

To make it an actual room, it should have a door that can close, but you can gain privacy in other ways.

Oh for gods sake, surely you are joking? You’ve clearly never been anywhere but the U.K. where it’s the norm for everyone to have a bedroom each. There is absolutely no reason why 3 bedrooms for your family of five isn’t ok. Why would the council house you when there are others desperately in need, family of five living in a one bed.

You May see this as a mean post but You’re clearly deluded.

A conservatory will be too cold. Get an architect to draw some plans up, you can maybe get an extension for that extra bedroom. As pp said, the council won't help.

We don't have money for all these home improvements though that's the thing

Get a sofa bed and sleep in the living room. I know it’s not a very common thing to do in the UK but it’s a practical solution.

You'll have to make do then. A relative was one of 11 siblings in a 4 bed, they had loads of bunk beds.

I know it can not be a great idea, but if you have equity can you not remortgage or release some equity for an extension/loft conversion?
Can the conservatory be replaced with a proper extension?

If you can fit a double bed in one of the small rooms then give the master to the 2 sharing siblings, and erect some sort of temporary divider

There are 5 of us living in a 2 bed! We have divided biggest bedroom so boys / girls get own space.

If you google 'regulating conservatory temperature uk' there are a number of websites suggesting solutions, some might be in budget, eg thermal blinds.

eg www.eygwindows.co.uk/lifestyle-blog/6-cold-conservatory-solutions-to-suit-every-budget

Or it could be that your DS is happy to trade some level of thermal comfort for having his own room, eg just wearing a hoodie and slippers when cold, cosy bedding etc.

Might be worth a try and without being able to move/improve an imperfect solution is probably better than no solution at all. You could try the conservatory over the next few months and see how it goes? Does it stay a sensible temperature in the summer, or does it get very hot?

The same sex kids can share a room, though. What’s the age gap? What are the ages of your DC? A friend of mine grew up in a family of ten in a three-bed. Four DC in two bunk beds in one room. Two DC in bunks in another. Two DC in bunks in the parents’ room.

What are the ages and sexes of your children?

I'm sure you realise that won't be eligible for council housing.

But maybe you could rent a 4 bed in a slightly cheaper area and rent out your own home to cover the cost?

If you don’t have the room the it’s tough your kids have to suck it up and share. There’s nothing you can do. I shared a room until I was 18 when my
Mother changed the dining room into a bedroom for me

1. Swap things around so sharing sibs get bigger room and then put a screen up if necessary for privacy.

1. Move yourselves downstairs with a sofa bed.

1. Put youngest child back in your room.

1. Use the conservatory either as a bedroom (not ideal but decent heaters and blinds might make it an acceptable option for the one so desperate for privacy) or else sort it so sitting room is toddler zone and conservatory is teen zone, and the bedroom is just for sleeping.

1. If brother and sister get along better, have them share instead of the two same sex siblings. Cue collective mumsnet horror but it’s not exactly that unusual, especially in preteens. Again, screens or bunk beds with access from different sides can give a bit more privacy where needed.

1. Tell child who is so desperate for their own space that you’re very sorry but unfortunately that’s not an option as you don’t have the budget for it, so that’s just the way it is. And that at least you have your own home and you aren’t living in a refugee camp or bomb shelter.

1. Offer teen a tent in the garden if sleeping alone is so desperately needed - but obviously continue to provide them a bed in the bedroom too!

The council won’t do anything as you own

The only thing you maybe able to do to increase size is sell your home and buy with shared ownership, but you would have to look into that

Otherwise

1. The same sex children share, they have the biggest room, bunk beds etc, you have next biggest

2 if you don’t want to do that you could sleep on a sofa bed downstairs 3 if you have a lounge/dining room could you partition that to make a bedroom and use the conservatory more as a lounge or dining room to replace

The council even if you didn't have a house wouldn't give a 4 bedroom to 3 kids
My friend has 4 kids in a 3 bed council house , 2 each share a room

When you had a 3rd dc did you consider bedrooms etc then
I used to have a 2 bed council house and we stopped at 2 dc as knew a third one sharing would be tight
If unplanned pregnancy had happened then we would of had to just make do and likely dh and I would of had a sofa bed in living room

I’m a bit stunned you thought the council would house you.

You have a home and you chose to have this many kids, so ensure they have the biggest room and you sleep in the living room or conservatory.

@lostitall

We don't have money for all these home improvements though that's the thing

So you think the council should pay instead? You are adequately housed, there’s no way you’ll get a council house. Either save up the money yourself or make do with your three bed.