Need new bedroom but can't move

[lostitall]

Hi there. Have a real dilemma in that we have a three bed with three small rooms. The two same sex kids can't share a room as big age gap but the room is also too small to divide. We can't get a remortgage or loan at present but my son desperately needs a bedroom of his own. What can we do? We have equity in the house- would the council offer us something?

How many of you are in the house?

Reading between the lines I think you have 3 children. , oldest and youngest are the same sex ? Is that right?
Do you have a partner?

I've seen ingenious solutions on MN, just give a bit more info and someone will surely come up with a plan.

Where is everyone sleeping now, how many are you and what ages/ sexes, when you say small rooms how small? How many rooms downstairs or is it all open plan.

Can you share the ages and sexes of the DC and MNers can suggest accordingly.

The real answer here is "only have kids you have the space/funds for" but we haven't invented time travel yet.

A friend of mine has always been in a tiny two bed starter home with 3 kids. they had a fold out bed in the lounge for many years so that the eldest dd could have a bedroom. Could this be an option for you? not ideal I know.

We’ve got friends with this dilemma - eldest early teens & youngest a toddler are girls, one boy in the middle. They’ve chosen to put the girls together, despite the age gap. I’d have given the smallest bedroom to the eldest girl as the middle boy is still mid-primary age so doesn’t need privacy and can share with youngest. There’s no one-size-fits-all solution depending on the actual ages and temperaments as well. But you just need to make the best of it with clever room dividing or thinking outside the box, or giving up your own bedroom.

We considered swapping our ‘master’ bedroom with the smaller bedroom so have you tried that - would that give an easier way to divide? We only needed enough space for a double bed we decided.

There is always the option of turning the conservatory into a storage room for clothes etc and then having the bedrooms with just beds.

This should leave enough room to divide one if one of the smallest fits a double.

Also I've seen people use landings for wardrobes and chest of drawers where they are big enough as extra storage.

The most genius one I saw was someone who used their downstairs hallway lined with units and each person took their clothes for the next day upstairs when they went to bed. She also said it was much easier to do the laundry and keep the rooms tidy!

And if you can use landings for storage then use the conservatory as a play room and keep all the toys outs of rooms to also create space.

I think a loft conversion might be worth considering or even a small extension if you have room? I got quoted 18k for a 12sqm extension including ensuite bathroom recently. You might have the option of adding the cost on to your mortgage and paying it off very slowly over time. Could be worth getting a few quotes anyway.

Otherwise I think the suggestion of good thermal blinds and heaters in the conservatory isn't a bad one. Might do as a stop gap for a couple years?

What age are your kids?

Oh for gods sake, surely you are joking? You’ve clearly never been anywhere but the U.K. where it’s the norm for everyone to have a bedroom each.

Yes it is the normal in the UK and much of the western world. This is Money Matters not AIBU and OP posted looking for genuine advice not snarky judgement. Grow up a small bit.

If you want the children to have a bedroom each then try this in the lounge

dunsterhouse.co.uk/helena-garden-office-right-w4-3m-x-d2-7m

Insulated log cabin for garden, gives space for your eldest

Keep bunk beds inside just incase?

I'd look into getting a proper roof on the conservatory op. Does it have any heating?
And decent blinds too.

When we were in our last house we briefly used the conservatory as a bedroom as we had all 4 children in a 3 bedroom house. When our eldest moved out to live with his fiancée we moved back in and converted the dining room to a bedroom for DD. Again, that was just for a few months as we sold up then and moved to a bigger place.

Would using the conservatory or dining room be an option?

Could you put an s shape bunk bed divider into the largest room? Put the bunk bed in the middle of the room and get a carpenter to add sides and top, that way the older one can go through the youngest's room and have some privacy. I would probably add a smoke detector. What is the age gap? How many years until the oldest is likely to go to uni/ get own place? At that time more flexible space ideas might be good. I presume you don't have a separate downstairs reception room you could repurpose?

You can get beds that fold up into cupboards into the wall. Would cost about £1000 to £1500. You could have one in the sitting room for you and your husband and the kids could have the bedrooms. It just looks like a normal cupboard unit and takes up hardly any room. I've seen them and they are amazing.

@shivawn

I think a loft conversion might be worth considering or even a small extension if you have room? I got quoted 18k for a 12sqm extension including ensuite bathroom recently. You might have the option of adding the cost on to your mortgage and paying it off very slowly over time. Could be worth getting a few quotes anyway.

Otherwise I think the suggestion of good thermal blinds and heaters in the conservatory isn't a bad one. Might do as a stop gap for a couple years?

What age are your kids?

Oh for gods sake, surely you are joking? You’ve clearly never been anywhere but the U.K. where it’s the norm for everyone to have a bedroom each.

Yes it is the normal in the UK and much of the western world. This is Money Matters not AIBU and OP posted looking for genuine advice not snarky judgement. Grow up a small bit.

Oooh that's not a bad price...def an option

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz

Can you share the ages and sexes of the DC and MNers can suggest accordingly.

The real answer here is "only have kids you have the space/funds for" but we haven't invented time travel yet.

Clever answer but my third was unplanned. Was hoping finances would permit us to have moved by now but life happened

@Bluntness100

I’m a bit stunned you thought the council would house you.

You have a home and you chose to have this many kids, so ensure they have the biggest room and you sleep in the living room or conservatory.

It's a consideration. We've paid a mortgage for 14 years and tax for years and years. Why shouldn't people who contribute to society get some help? We've done a lot more than some people who've had kids young and been in a council house since day dot and kept adding to their brood

I've got a 7 year gap between my sons and they share. The youngest uses my bedroom to hang out in while his brother uses their bedroom. Works well for us

Because op there is not enough social housing that if you have more kids you can house you can just sell up and move into one. That’s not how it works.

We've paid a mortgage for 14 years and tax for years and years. Why shouldn't people who contribute to society get some help? We've done a lot more than some people who've had kids young and been in a council house since day dot and kept adding to their brood

Because you don't need help - you own a 3 bed. Sell it and put down a deposit on somewhere bigger and pay a larger mortgage? Why on earth would the council house you if you own a home? There's no reason you can't rent a 4 bed if you want to. Making those kinds of judgmental comments isn't helping you at all. In fact you are in a much better position than a lot of people, so the woe is me act isn't going to be well received.

Yeh because tax is voluntary right OP?! If you paid for your births and schooling privately would u be better off? Unless a very high tax payer I would think you are still a net taker of tax like most of us

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

Yeh because tax is voluntary right OP?! If you paid for your births and schooling privately would u be better off? Unless a very high tax payer I would think you are still a net taker of tax like most of us

Exactly - tax paid is barely going to cover health care and education for three kids so not a valid argument.

My credit issues mean it's not simple to just sell and move elsewhere obviously hence having not done that
Yeah I'm a right arsehole for struggling right now having helped myself through the years including ill health

@lostitall

My credit issues mean it's not simple to just sell and move elsewhere obviously hence having not done that Yeah I'm a right arsehole for struggling right now having helped myself through the years including ill health

OP there are families out there with no home that are stuck in hostels and bedside, why on earth would the council help a family who have enough rooms? They will just have to share, I had to share with my sister growing up, there was a big gap(I was in infant school while she was in secondary school) but we coped.