Reasonable budget?

[Yorkshiremummyof1]

For the first time in years I have my money before my bills, it’s because I’m paid 4weekly and I’ve caught up with it. I’ve been in debt for years, paying it off etc but this is my last chance to break a cycle in terms of panicking about money! This is just my June budget, there’s less money for the end 4 weeks than there will be in July because I’ve already paid my rent so I’m counting it from when I’m paid on Friday to the next 4 weeks. I’d just like some sanity checking especially when the spends, bills not so much. Income includes “rent” from my partner, salary, CB, maintenance. Next month would have an additional £900 but I’ll get to that in July! I have a significant amount of debt so getting this right is vital. For clarity, there’s two adults, a child, two dogs and two cats. WFH so no childcare at the moment, DS is at school 5 days a week so has packed lunches

Income June 2281

Bills June 508.33

Razor sub 8
Virgin media 24
Rent 0 (paid)
Cat insurance 7.53&7.53
Now tv 1.60
Spotify 9.99
Netflix 11.99 (half is paid for by ex, don’t include it in income figure)
NHS 10.40
Kindle 7.99
Mobile 90 (yep! Going down by 25 in august. iPad and two mobiles because I’m a twit)
Council tax 84
iTunes 3.50 (cloud subscription, i need to move all my documents that are in the storage before cancelling)
Dog insurance 25 (two dogs)
Bulb 100 (overpaying as have a balance)
Water 43.40 (rates, think we would pay more on a meter)
Car insurance 35.40
Car tax 11
Dog food 27 (subscription so count as a bill)

Savings 350

Car maintenance 50
Marcus account 250 (building emergency fund)
Help to save 50

Spending 589.96 (this is where it feels too much)

Groceries 200 (usually more but have a freezer full of meat)
Veg box 90
Meat box 0
Fuel 100 (drop of DS8 at his dads in another town, school drop off)
Kitty litter 15
Cat food 45 (one cat has allergies so has to have good food, spent 43 at a time but might last longer than a month, buy from zooplus)
Milkman 25
My spends 45
Clothing 50 (this month £30 Clark’s shoes for DS8, also anticipating a growth spurt and school uniform)
DS pocket money £20 (enough for him to save to buy a game whilst giving him enough that he doesn’t ask me to buy him something, he has a nimbl card to teach him how to budget so he doesn’t end up like his mother. I buy him nothing, anything he wants he has to save for.)

Debt 607.94 including 176.24 to pay off credit card in full which is emergency card. So this payment won’t be there next month as my partner keeps hold of the card and once emergency fund is built I won’t need it.

Leaves me with £225.47 this month

However I have to give DP £40 for blinds, buy a cat litter box disposal thing and some crate mats for the dogs. DP has a lot more disposable income than me, we aren’t married and have only lived together for a few months so we aren’t merging finances, also won’t have a joint account till I have no debt because he owns his house and I don’t want to affect his mortgage renewal. We rent his house out and I get that income as his contribution to my finances.

I have £45 as spends which covers anything I want for myself, tried going cold turkey and due to various compulsive spending issues it made it worse. Actually in therapy at the moment and my compulsive spending has roots apparently. Once I transfer spending to my starling account, DP changes my logins for my main account so I can’t go in and transfer money out. Mum has my savings account logins.

My issue has always been chipping away at my main bank account to the point where I’m stressed about paying rent. This is the first time I have the opportunity to start from scratch. Next month I could have £600 left over with which to pay off debt so I want to prove I can do it this month, hence why I have some spending money for myself. Groceries is a huge issue in our house, DP likes a £10 bottle of wine, I like snacks and we’re a fan of lots of olives and deli meat.....he’s the type of man who will only eat sourdough and posh marmalade. Last month I spent....£600 on groceries. Yep. Disgusting. So I’m going to do a weekly shop and try to do it online

I’ve had years and years of bad money habits so I want to try to make good ones

@RyanBergarasTeeth

Well done op sounds like you have a good focus. Hows it been making changes? Ive been writing lists of everything i want and need and trying to cut costs as well as i need to save save save.

Oh I’m hating it. I have no limited self restraint so to not be able to buy stuff is frustrating. And I mean that in the sense that I’m itching to do it. I’m itching to have a standard of life I can’t afford right now.

I’m coping by not visiting the Co op (£10 snacks without even trying) and I’ve made sure all the bills are funded and then every penny leftover I put into the Halifax card. So I have nothing left to spend. If I manage to have all my bills money and not touch it, that will be a huge achievement

Had a Morrison’s delivery today, my trolley went up to £150 and I chipped away til it was £42. I think online groceries is the way forward. D

I’ve baked some potatoes so no excuse to be “hungry” and “need” to go to the shop. I’m taking it day by day, trying to form some new habjts

Ah, I didn't realise that you were effectively banned from using the new card. Keep going as you are then, it sounds like you have a plan to build up your emergency fund sensibly anyway.

For kindle books, keep an eye on the daily and monthly deals, where lots of books go down to 99p, even 'good' mainstream ones, not obscure self published stuff that makes up the majority of kindle unlimited. Unless you read more than 8 books a month, it's likely to work out cheaper. I've only allowed myself to buy the books I want if they are 99p for years, because I have so many unread books and I really try not to buy them at all these days.

OP I’m so impressed. It’s much more impressive to do something when you find it tough than to breeze through.
With the kindle could you look at your local libraries for options on borrowing ebooks?
Did you brave a safety razer? Think you’ll be a convert if you have periods you could go for an eco and money saving option there too and try a moon cup. Probably scarier than a safety razer but they work perfectly and it could save a fortune. Good luck!

I guess an update to how I’m doing, I’m paid this Friday I have no idea how much I’ll have to plough into debt until I’ve balanced my books etc.
Haven’t worked out my bills and whatnot but...

Razor sub 8 I got rid of this, I have 4 weeks worth of razors left and then I’m looking at getting a scary safety razor. My question is.......lady parts? I know this is really tmi, but I’m a fan of the uh, hairless look. I don’t even mean look. Basically I’m terrified I’m going to give myself an injury.

Virgin media 24 renewal 9th august, I looked at other providers and I’m not sure going down on the speed is a good idea give, the three gaming PCS etc but will maybe try downgrading with Virgin.

Kindle 7.99 got rid of this

Mobile 90 Is now 65 and no room for movement on that for another year when it will be....£20! I asked the phone company, and they knocked £1 off...oh well

Dog insurance 25 (two dogs) is now £13 as my ex husband wanted his dog back now he’s moved somewhere suitable and it worked out best actually

Bulb 100 (overpaying as have a balance) switched to EON, will have a credit balance to pay with Bulb but looks like I might save £100 or £175 over the year. I’m looking forward to smart meter and seeing what we actually use and how to reduce our consumption.

Dog food 27, has gone down due to one dog and also it’s stupid for me to get such big bags at once as I can’t store it. I can get smaller bags in my Morrison’s delivery for the same as the subscription price whilst on offer. Don’t need to buy any in July however

Car maintenance 50 saving this for December mot

Help to save 50 still doing this, the bonus I’d get in two years could settle an old defaulted debt so it’s worth it

Groceries 200, I spent 250 in June which is impressive for me. I’ve upped it to 300 for July as I think at the end of the month I’ll need to do a meat restock. But I’m still aiming for 200 generally.

Veg box 90 gone

Fuel 100 spent 70 last month but will probably need whole budget in July

Kitty litter 15 actually turns out it’s 8, they went through one bag during June but that might be because I have a litter locker and am just scooping the poo, basically I’m managing it better so using less.

Cat food 45 - soooooo....they’re now just have two wet meals a day and dry food is down during the day. Dry food is kitten applaws and I think the £13 bag will last the month. Then I changed they really posh wet food from £2.39kg to £1.87kg. Could have got it for less by getting bigger cans but I think a 800g can is too big and I might waste some. Don’t know the cost of this monthly and won’t know til I start tracking it in August but definitely not £45. I’m going to say maybe £25 or less.

Milkman 25 keeping milkman, I know it’s expensive but I really want to support a local business and I did give up the veg box!

I didn’t give DP any money for the blinds....

I took control of my accounts back and I’m trying to spend all of my money when I get it so that it’s gone.... by spend, I mean pay everything I need to.

I am eBaying my life, so far after fees I’ve made £100 but to be fair a lot of that was DSs Nintendo something or another which he hasn’t played for ages as he also had a Switch. I budgeted £100 for his birthday, and am buying the things he wants second hand in eBay which I think will come to £90. I have one of the £25 games he wants, that was £16. I’m tracking eBay money in ynab, and at the end of the month I’ll transfer the balance to a debt.

So......my issue is.

I now have £500 in my emergency account which is good!

I have £1660 left on my Halifax card, paid £150 end of June as DP gave me £150 for some stuff I bought months ago but forgot to ask him for the money for. And I had a refund and something else which was £130 so in total I’ve knocked it down by £280. I’m planning on throwing eBay earnings to it. But my emergency savings are staring at me, telling me I should use them to pay off debt. But that’s not what they are there for! I just have a paying off bug.

I could use them to pay off my £488.01 overdraft that I’ve been paying back in instalments. Then out the £65 I was paying towards that towards my credit card. I could build the EF back up. I dunno, it’s just annoying me that I have the money to clear a debt but I’m not supposed to if I’m following Dave Ramsey.

Maybe I need to go crunch my numbers first

Op this thread is really interesting and has inspired me massively.

Having been on furlough for three months and a blown up cooker to replace and a whopping vet bill unplanned for (yes I have insurance but only covered a third of the bill so left with over £800 to clear) I've decided to sit this week when I'm not at work (first week bak yay) and crunch our numbers massively.

Now we will both be bak to full pay I can start clearing stuff quicker.

We've already meal planned and budgeted food for the month. We have seperated it into two two weekly shops at £150 max each time so dropped budget to £300 a month as we were spending way over £600 and it's all extras and crap 😳

Now have a dog that needs a special diet so that will cost more but have a seperate budget for animas.

Also waiting on a refund for a holiday we've spent 18 months busting a gut to pay for so we are throwing around ideas on how to beat utilise the money when it comes back.

Have a 12 month plan of which smaller debts to clear and by 12 months it could look a lot brighter but we need to rebuild our emergency fund as it got depleted end of last year due to washing machine and tumble dryer and a car bill all going wrong so have to start it again.

We'd just got out of feb and xmas spending and had our years plan for building up fund and then COVID happened 🤨

We've tightened the birthday budgets this year and xmas last year and will do again this xmas and it makes a big difference.

@relievedlady Oh I'm glad!

I feel you on the £600 worth of food front.... I don't know where I am yet with July but I'll be checking tonight. I'd think we're at about £90 so far. But that includes dishwasher tablet stock up for instance.

I realised I don't need to buy dog food this month as found half a bag on top of the freezer so that felt like a free win!

Maybe you could put the holiday money towards the £800? Make sure you've got an emergency fund so that next time you have a huge vet bill it is covered. Then focus on clearing smaller debts. Organise by what has the highest interest and pay that off first. I personally cleared a 0% debt first because it was small and I wanted the psychological win but now I am focusing on the Halifax credit card which is around 20% and I'm on £1660. I have just sold a tent for £200 so when I get paid on Friday, I'm putting £500 back into my EF as I had withdrawn that to pay off the smaller debt. And then I should maybe have £400 to put on the credit card. I then will look over the budget and expenses and see what else I can put on the card. I have no idea at the moment!

Hi op.
Just checked back in here.

Funnily enough have been looking through our household budget etc and have a bit more of a plan for paying of smaller debts as I now have an idea on when which one is due to end first ,second,third etc on the current payment terms

Also checked the interest on them all so I've got a kind of plan that by the end of this month when we are paid I will put into place.

Dh is shite with money so it's always left to me to sort out debts and bills etc which I prefer anyway as I know where I am.

He has his own savings on the go for a big item but he's so crap he dips in and out of it and blows a ridiculous amount each month on air and not much else

Il be telling him each month how much extra to pay into joint account to pay another chunk off debts and get rid of them ASAP.

Dh will be going the same way if he doesn't actually learn to adult where finances are concerned

I want to really aim to clear all the little debts as soon as possible

@relievedlady

Hi op. Just checked back in here.

Funnily enough have been looking through our household budget etc and have a bit more of a plan for paying of smaller debts as I now have an idea on when which one is due to end first ,second,third etc on the current payment terms

Also checked the interest on them all so I've got a kind of plan that by the end of this month when we are paid I will put into place.

Dh is shite with money so it's always left to me to sort out debts and bills etc which I prefer anyway as I know where I am.

He has his own savings on the go for a big item but he's so crap he dips in and out of it and blows a ridiculous amount each month on air and not much else

Il be telling him each month how much extra to pay into joint account to pay another chunk off debts and get rid of them ASAP.

Dh will be going the same way if he doesn't actually learn to adult where finances are concerned

I want to really aim to clear all the little debts as soon as possible

So there is a website called what’s the cost.com

It’s pretty slow and clunky BUT if you want to motivate your partner...enter all your debts , interest rates And minimum payments. And it will show you how much interest you will pay etc. You can save it and update it when you pay off chunks etc.

Well since I last played I’ve sold MORE stuff on eBay and I have got the card down to £1360.
Unfortunately however my partner moved out yesterday due to various issues so my income just dropped by £500 per month. Meaning I can’t overpay any debt and eBay is now my only source of extra income. I’m glad I paid off the overdraft as that gives me a little flexibility as well as reducing a lot of my debts. It’s manageable at least.

What this means in terms of finances

Can pay bills
Will have £50 to snowball debts
Need to eBay everything including the spare double bed that is in my shed
Need to crack on with eBay listing as I “only” have 32 things listed at the moment

Priority after work today is the basket of my clothes I don’t fit and...the wedding dress

Just read your whole thread and my comment was going to be, get rid of the man. Sorry to hear youre on your own, but it doesnt sound like he was adding value to your life and was costing you money. The £500 was probably not a full £500.

Do you need Spotify?

I’d look at what you really need and don’t need

Do you really need Spotify? You can get it free, cancellation would mean £120 in the year

Razor sub £8 di you really need this?

Apple TV - you only watch Netflix so why spend on this

Can you look on amazon to get any better deals on cat litter and food and use some savings to buy 6 months worth?

Can you search for dog and cat insurance in one bundle to get better deal?

@MushyPeasAreTheDevilsFood

Just read your whole thread and my comment was going to be, get rid of the man. Sorry to hear youre on your own, but it doesnt sound like he was adding value to your life and was costing you money. The £500 was probably not a full £500.

Do you need Spotify?

The £500 is after working it all out but what I’ll lose in money I’ll gain in having stress free house.

Don’t need Spotify but I use it everyday for a fair few hours. It’s a luxury I want to keep and I’d give up chocolate to keep it

@ivykaty44

I’d look at what you really need and don’t need

Do you really need Spotify? You can get it free, cancellation would mean £120 in the year

Razor sub £8 di you really need this?

Apple TV - you only watch Netflix so why spend on this

Can you look on amazon to get any better deals on cat litter and food and use some savings to buy 6 months worth?

Can you search for dog and cat insurance in one bundle to get better deal?

Spotify is never leaving me. And I’m now paying £6.50 for it.

Razor sub already gone
I don’t have Apple TV, do you mean Now TV? That is being cancelled in October.

Cat litter I get from pets at home £7 for 30 litres and I’ve downgraded the cat food considerably but now I only have one dog the cost of that has naturally halved!

Hey OP looks like you're doing great at reducing your debts.

I imagine your food bill will drop now that you're not keeping up with his tastes?
Can you apply for single persons council tax discount?
Have you worked out how long it will now take you to pay your debts off without your ex dp? You obviously made the right choice not to combine finances.

You seem to be making a great job of this Yorkshiremummyof1. Sorry about your DP moving out but it sounds as if it was the right decision for you both. I do think you will find that you are not £500 down when your food costs etc go down too.

As mentioned, you will now be eligible for 25% council tax discount. You mentioned that your DS is still at school so he is 'disregarded' (the official term) until he is 18. I agree with you keeping the milkman. It is great not needing to go into shops for milk. Having a milkman came into its own when lockdown first happened. Fingers crossed, that won't happen again but it can't be excluded.

I used to be terrible with money so I know about the savings v emergency fund argument. The emergency fund is really about helping you to get better at budgeting. If you are paying interest on a card or overdraft, it is financially better to pay them off as soon as possible. However, I think it really helps to build annual expenses like a car/boiler service into your monthly bills. You then put money for that aside each month so you are not faced with a big bill out of the blue. Apologies if I'm stating the obvious!

@3littlemonkeys82

So I agree re food. I had a gastric sleeve two years ago and so what I eat for dinner might be, three forkfuls of mash potato and half a chipolata and then I’m full. So between me and DS we eat for one person. Whenever I have bought fancy food it’s been for my partner. So our food budget is £400 and I contribute £200. And honestly, because I know how much he eats I’ve been balancing it out with stuff for me like nice yoghurt and Pepsi Max. I’m not likely to buy that when we are on our own. On my own, I’ll make lentil Dahl and live on that for a week, with shreddies for breakfast (and sometimes lunch). So we might find actually it’s £150 pm plus milk. I fed DP before he moved in so I actually don’t know the true cost and I’m interested to see. Now, DP is giving me £300 a month for the next 4 months because of the fact that he can - I’m not relying on it turning up but I think he feels guilty so if he does give it to me I’ll put it on my card. Working on the assumption that he won’t give it though.

Single persons tax discount already applied for. I was on top of that the instant he left. Adjusted my energy direct debit as well now his PC isn’t on all bloody night because the cats have turned it on!

@nettie434 100% if I had had an emergency fund before I wouldn’t have ever got into debt. Apart from my financially abusive ex husband, having no money put aside meant I got cards and then it just went Pete tong.

There was £500 in the EF, I put it on the overdraft to eliminate the £65 per month going out. Just removing that payment eases the financial strain a bit. You know, one month I might divert that to the card but another month I might have an expense and need it.

So debts...I hadn’t listed everything I have because it’s a huge amount but it doesn’t stress me out because half of it is family loans. I’m not complacent about it I am realistic.

I have 39k, I had 44k in October 2019.

8k is family loan paid at £50 a month (tbh I don’t expect this to be paid in full, she may well pass away before I get to that and her will states what is owed ends up being my inheritance)
3.6k is to my dad paid at £225 per month. Last payment due December 21 so as you can imagine I’m looking forward to that date. He paid for my divorce basically
1.3k to Halifax (this was 1.9 at the start of this thread) 20% interest and focused on this
2.6k credit card 0% til nov 21
--£500 overdraft—
2k mum who paid for me to move house away from exh no payments being made yet
£200 on my capital one card but this is paid in full each month, it’s where my Morrison’s food order gets charged to so I don’t include this as a debt

Then...whatever the difference between that and 39k is defaulted debt run up by either supporting my lazy exh or by living a lifestyle he wanted that I couldn’t pay for as well as spending issues on my half due to severe depression. Not bipolar but I had phases where I had “good” ideas and would buy an expensive course and never do it that sort of thing. Curbed that though now....

All of that bad debt is defaulted and I pay each one £1 a month. The biggest one is 9k and the smallest is £600.

My plan is to clear credit card before the end of this year. Whether I have DPs income or not I’ll find a way. Then the 0% card I’ll focus on that. And then Dads loan will be cleared.

Once those are done I have £50 to family loan and £9 pm to my defaulted debts.

I will have enough left over once cleared the other debts to start saving to settle the defaulted debts. I’m going to offer each debt 20% of the remaining value with the aim to settle for no more than 50%. So I’ll save up £300 to settle the £600 debt and I’ll work through them until I reach the big one of 9k and as they offered already to settle at 50% I’m convinced they’re likely to settle at 3k.

At the start of this year I managed to clear my car lease debt, my simply be account and a couple of other things so I’m in a much better position now I’m running a crappy corsa rather than a £360 car lease. But my loan to my dad is kinda what is killing my finances at the moment but no room for negotiation. I’ve applied for UC as I’ll get my childcare costs but I get paid twice in a reporting period in October which means for two months I won’t get any so I need to factor childcare costs

Oh and I’ve sold £400 on eBay which is why I could pay £300 to my credit card. Money hasn’t been releases yet but that will go back into EF to replace what I took out and then I’m leaving it at £500 with £50 going in each month for car maintenance.

Putting £50 into help to save (I got UC before DP moved in) as I’ll get a bonus after two years and those bonuses will help clear debts.

I have had to spend some money this month, as I’ve shrunk I’m wearing leggings that are three sizes too big so £40 at primark yesterday replaced baggy ones plus three night dresses and two tshirts.

Need to post eBay stuff today and list another ten things. I have some clothe last to go up and I’m debating on the expensive bike in my shed that my dad left.

Also have some more camping stuff to list. I think I’ve got another £100 to come shortly on eBay. I was debating on the iPad Pro but honestly, I use it every day and I have a lot invested in that eco system in terms of apps so not sure it makes sense to switch. Old uni books are listed, what doesn’t sell I’ll use one of the book sites. I need to list my wedding dress, monsoon dress I bought for £50 - it was new and it’s gorgeous so I’m hoping I can get £50 but might try Facebook first.

I need to do this systematically and room by room.

Bedroom - wardrobe with some dresses to go, will keep my coats until I really need smaller ones. Also have a backpack that’s supposedly hand luggage size, I do use it but reckon I could get some money for it. Might have some shoes. I have a couple of Filofaxes listed.

DS room - some books he doesn’t read, we junked a lot of his toys and there is a big basket of clothes in his room. He has tons of Star Wars Lego but I’d need to go through the huge tub and match stuff up to the instructions. I’d suggest he has about £1000 worth of Lego but my mum would kill me if I sold it as it was gifted.

Kitchen, I’ve sold the rice cooker, I have a popcorn maker to sell. I have some instant pot accessories I could sell on eBay, I’ll keep the waffle maker and maybe could sell some cookery books (vegan ones perhaps)

With DP gone I might not need to keep the heated airer but it does fold down and I can just use half of it so that probably will stay.

Shed has bikes in it, plus a bike rack I can’t see me ever using. I’ve got some of dads old cycling shoes that I’ll eBay. Shed, rest of camping stuff but I’m going to keep one of the tents.

Living room - see if DS needs to keep all of his old games, more books I could list but nothing really if value in there

quick tip

I rang internet provider virgin and cancelled my contract - refused to be swayed on the phone just cancelled. Within a day I had an email offering me a discount of £14 per month on a contract I was paying £41 per month for.£168 quid off the years subscription

in my case I had to cancel for various other reasons - but if you want cheaper deals with virgin then cancel by phone and make sure you check your emails....

@ivykaty44

quick tip

I rang internet provider virgin and cancelled my contract - refused to be swayed on the phone just cancelled. Within a day I had an email offering me a discount of £14 per month on a contract I was paying £41 per month for.£168 quid off the years subscription

in my case I had to cancel for various other reasons - but if you want cheaper deals with virgin then cancel by phone and make sure you check your emails....

Thats what I do every year but haven't managed to get it lower than £24 a month. Maybe....maybe this year they'll do it for £21. Contract is up next month so I need to get looking. Can't leave virgin though as I don't have a phone line or even a BT box I think this house has only ever had virgin!

I tried ringing a few times but no response so its on my list

Couldn’t get through to virgin, sent a complaint in as that was the only way I could contact them, totally understand limited contact centre staff but my complaint was centred around the fact that they don’t provide any other method of cancelling. I’d been on hold for an hour at one point.

So a lady rang me back and I explained I needed to keep my bills down now my partner had moved out and she was pushy for 30 minutes and I ended up giving in and my bill basically went bloody up! From 24 to 29.

Final straw was the internet dropping again last night and also in the middle of a work conference call. So this morning I’ve rung up got through to a lovely lady and it took a mere 6 minutes from dealing to get cancelled.

Now.... I need to find an internet provider that is reliable. I’ll have to have a phone socket installed and I might end up paying more than virgin looking at what’s available but apparently being a customer for 11 years means naff all. I’m not entirely sure what speed I need but I guess if it’s reliable it can be slower than shitty virgin