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Oh dear :( seem to have gotten ourselves in a finacial pickle with Wedding ...

80 replies

kitsandbits · 30/08/2007 09:55

and not the kind you would expect!

We havent overspent, in fact we are broke before that! Lol

Basically we decided to do our house up with the money my parents were giving us for the wedding.

We ALL decided that was best as everything we own since moving in 2 years ago was second hand and falling apart. Me and DP arent 'party people' and weren't looking forwards to the reception at all.

So we are getting married and going back to my mums after with small group of people for meal and champers.

BUT - we had a small amount of money put away for the wedding, but when we started to do up the house we got a bit carried away and spent it on flooring for the kitchen and other bits.

Now its 8 weeks till the wedding - and even though were not doing it BIG I hadnt realised how much we do still actully have to buy and now Im panicking!!

Basically i need shawls/boleros for the 3 bridesmaids as its winter and cant have them freeze - (I can do my own make up - but wouyldve liked to buy some new) i have no nice underwear, the men dont have suits, the fee for the church and other bits and bobs!

Oh and the champers and buffet food!
Oh dear

OP posts:
Lizzzombie · 30/08/2007 13:32

Kitty - dress is amazing! Which ebay shop did you find it in?

Your MIL sounds dreadful. Have you been totally frank with her and told her you need that money back asap?

kitsandbits · 30/08/2007 13:35

you can all help here

lol

Ill sort it out - scrimp and save

OP posts:
bookthief · 30/08/2007 13:38

That's a great idea about a car boot sale. I bet if you made a big banner saying something like "Kitty's Wedding Fund Sale" people would be less haggly than they normally are at these things.

Chirpygirl · 30/08/2007 13:42

We did our wedding on a budget of 500 quid, including booze! We got a local sandwich/deli type shop to do the buffet and when it arrived we laid it out on nice platters I had borrowed from my mum. - cost £120 for 30 people
We bought wine boxes and cava on bogofs for drinking - £40
People organised their own clothes, bridesmaids can wear their own coats and whip them off for photos, they won't get hypothermia for 2 minutes! and does it really matter if suits don't match? Just buy matching ties or material to make cummerbund things and ask people to wear black or charcoal suits.

Have you had a hen night? could your bridesmaids get everyone to club in on some underwear vouchers for you?

good luck!

RibenaBerry · 30/08/2007 13:43

Why don't you make a detailed list of everything you need? You might be surprised how many MNers have things they could lend you? Just a thought...

Do you need/want a cake? I have heard that Costco do some good ones.

Lizzzombie · 30/08/2007 13:43

My sister was skint when she was organising her wedding and so i wrote to a few wedding magazines asking for freebies.
All we got was a couple of copies of bridal magazines...but it all helps. Maybe you can write a better letter than me. I bet they have tons of wedding favours, decorations which you are considering not buying because of cost, and they have them just lying around their office.

Also, true life stories in mags. They pay about £50 - £200 you could sell your story? Or make one up? I am sure someone would buy one about evil MIL taking wedding fund for a boob job!

fizzylemonade · 30/08/2007 18:53

Your dress is truly beautiful and you look amazing. As you already have a house, children etc can you not ask your guests for money in a polite way??? Our friends did with a poem with the wedding invite.

We asked for vouchers for our wedding some 8 years ago and the only people who were offended were my in-laws. Everyone else understood that we had been living together so already had the usual wedding gifts.

Some people actually admitted having a wedding list at say debenhams & took all their gifts back to get the cash!!!!!!

I know you need cash before the day, but I would ask your friends to rally round in lieu of a wedding present.

CountessDracula · 30/08/2007 19:05

How many are coming to the party kits?

Califrau · 30/08/2007 19:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kitsandbits · 30/08/2007 19:41

Hi CD - no idea on numbers - have to keep it small though! am thinking 50 tops.

Not too worried about the buffet really - can whip something up

and am having a late wedding so people can have lunch before then buffet at the night,

Have sold my bug so have a bit of cash in the kitty now hopefully!

OP posts:
LIZS · 30/08/2007 20:09

50 is still a lot. Get making a list !

kitsandbits · 30/08/2007 20:11

We both have big catholic families - not easy to narrow it down!

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morningpaper · 30/08/2007 20:16

OK

I am the EXPERT on cheap weddings

What is left to get?

Are you in the UK because there is this GREAT bubbly from Aldi (I did a special trip to get some) which is 5.49 and has won lots of awards

What else do you need

morningpaper · 30/08/2007 20:19

Dress is lovely - WOOF!

You don't need posh underwear - buy something nice in Next or something, underwear is CHEAP

Do you NEED suits? Do any of them have waistcoats? Why not just buy them all matching ties and hankies and tell them to wear their nicest suits with white or cream shirts? (I got a lovely tie for DP for £5 from Debenham's - it sounds awful but was much nicer than the silk ones TBH)

As long as the men have BUTTONHOLES it will look fine (Asda - 10 roses for £3)

morningpaper · 30/08/2007 20:20

You have done the right thing so don't worry about the wedding - money on house is much much more sensible

kitsandbits · 30/08/2007 20:21

Hiya

God thanks - Im all over the place

Need champers

food (but thats easy enough)

Suits for DP, best man and FOB

Flowers

My aunts going to make shawls,

ummm thats it really

and maybe some ideas to jazz up my mums house - is lovely big white openplan house.

OP posts:
kitsandbits · 30/08/2007 20:23

any idea on how much hired suits work out at?

OP posts:
LIZS · 30/08/2007 20:24

suggest from £45 but you cna buy M and S (or similar) ones for under £100, get each to pay for their own.

morningpaper · 30/08/2007 20:28

OK

house - BALLOONS - Asda do a helium kit for £19.99 and this comes with colourful balloons, they look GREAT in bunches in the house.

Flowers - do you have a friend who can arrange them? Can you spend £50-70 quid in Asda the day before? You can buy SHEDLOADS of flowers for that. I bought 10 bunches of red and white roses from Asda for £30 and it was lovely. Do you need them for the church as well? Church flower ladies are usually more than willing to arrange things for you - you could give them £50 quid and they would go MAD buying and decorating the church for you - for a fraction of the price that a professional would.

Champers - assuming you are in the UK then go for this one from Aldi. Philil Michel Cremant du Jura - this went down REALLY well at our do. I bought 8 bottles which is about 64 glasses and it was really nice (and am a complete wine snob normally). I drank about 4 bottles and the rest was enough for everyone else.

morningpaper · 30/08/2007 20:29

Hired suits were about 80 quid each IIRC plus fancy bits - seemed like a lot to me

morningpaper · 30/08/2007 20:31

Yes MossBros suits + ties combos from 70-130 each

LIZS · 30/08/2007 20:32

You could contact the flower ladies (church wodul have a number) and you may find that someone else is already funding flowers in memory of a loved one that week, in which case you may be able to split the cost and/or agree a suitable colour scheme.

morningpaper · 30/08/2007 20:37

yes that it true

Or your wedding might be after a funeral and you can nick their flowers

Overtiredmum · 30/08/2007 20:39

Your dress and gorgeous and you look stunning in it.

We hired suits from Burtons when we got married (end of 2005), worked out £50 each which included trousers, jacket, waistcoat, shirt, cravat and cufflinks. The quality of their suits was better than Moss Bros.!

We didnt have champers, we got Cava from Asda for the toasts (they are doing three bottles for £10 a the moment), and we got BOGOFs on the wine which worked out so much cheaper.

We did our own evening buffet, we got a couple of really nice bits from M&S, a nice cooked gammon and meat platters and then put together with our own salads, potato salads etc. Our wedding cake was from M&S and I decorated it myself with some silk roses and it was beautiful. The meat platters cost no more than £40 and the cakes (we had three tier) cost £60 all together I think.

We got married three weeks before Chrimbo so we brought loads of chrimbo decs and tinsel and decorated the place ourselves, looked lovely.

Flowers, my best friend ordered my bouquet as a wedding present, but we got flowers from Asda and made our own buttonholes for groom, best man and we put together two small bouquets for the mums. We saved a fortune.

I hope that helps but I am sure it will be a magical day anyway, you will all be able to let your hair down and celebrate your wedding and your mum's fantastic news. Best wishes to you [hugs]

LIZS · 30/08/2007 20:47

Lounge suit from £35 @ Burtons