Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Money matters

Find financial and money-saving discussions including debt and pension chat on our Money forum. If you're looking for ways to make your money to go further, sign up to our Moneysaver emails here.

Original poster

To use DCs Xmas money for a family holiday?

365 replies

Ooooophhh · 07/01/2020 09:53

Last year we stayed in a fantastic holiday cottage in our favourite place to hide away which had to be unfortunately cut short.
We have booked our 2 week summer holiday this year so it is not that we aren't going on holiday this year.
However, I have been snooping online and discovered a brilliant deal on the cottage for 1 week over half term. It will cost us in the region of £300 for 1 week in the 5* accommodation-money we don't have at the moment . But, DCs who are toddlers, received money for Christmas totalling this amount. They don't need anything so we were planning on paying the cash into their bank accounts, but I'm now wondering whether to use the money for a family get away instead.
Am I being selfish and indulgent to use their money for this? I just want a change of scenery and nothing to do for a week!

OP posts:
LikeGlitterandGold · 07/01/2020 22:02

"Creating lovely memories" but no doubt having a whine on here when it comes to university living fees.

Where is it written that all monies given have to be saved for university living fees? Good grief - the Op could have spent the Christmas money on plastic tat for the DC but instead is thinking of a lovely holiday for them. If you read OP's posts you'll see she and the GPs are saving for future education expenses.

cushioncovers · 07/01/2020 22:02

To answer your question op no I wouldn't use my kids savings go to go on holiday.

And If you can't afford the rent for the cottage how will you pay for the activities food etc?

Put the money on a credit card and pay it off over the next few months instead

Original poster
Ooooophhh · 07/01/2020 22:07

After talking with DH, we are using the saved money for activities etc which we already put aside for half terms/easter etc for the cottage and DCs christmas money for activities whilst we are there.

Of course, labelling it doesn't make all that difference as it will all got towards the same things anyway.

We have found some excellent February half term activities in the area and we will be visiting a castle with outdoor play, going to visitor centre with a range of activities on and face painting, a boat trip and a theatre trip. DH and I get a log burner and a change of scenery for ourselves.

Seems fair?

OP posts:
peachypetite · 07/01/2020 22:10

Save it for their futures.

FeemyMacdermot · 07/01/2020 22:11

Sounds more than fair, OP. I hope you all have a lovely time. Mine would have loved that kind of holiday at that age!

Original poster
Ooooophhh · 07/01/2020 22:15

Thank you.
DH has said that the money from his parents was not intended to be banked, but enjoyed now. I think he is right as both us and Inlaws already save for their futures. I suppose as I budget for different pots, I was getting too analytical over it all, I could easily take money from other pots to cover the 300 and use DCs money for the activities.
Thank you to any posters for shedding light on this.

OP posts:
small2018 · 07/01/2020 22:26

Thanks!

Thestrangestthing · 07/01/2020 22:31

It's not just £150. The OP has already said that they have piggy banks and savings accounts. If she spends everything they get on herself they'll have nothing saved for their future.

Well good job she's not spending everything they get then, isn't it.

yogo · 07/01/2020 22:36

I'm shocked that any parent would think this is okay.

I've just told my teenage DCs and they are wide eyed with the thought you'd take the money given to your DCs for another holiday.

Drum2018 · 07/01/2020 22:38

Sounds like you will all have a fab time - enjoy!

Hollachica · 07/01/2020 22:44

Gosh I am a bit surprised of the YABU, to be honest. I think it is a great thing for you to do, use the money for a family get a-way. Everyone benefits. Just make sure they do everything they enjoy. Family time together what could be more fun. Take lots of photos of the things you do and send a collage to the money givers saying thank you.

Willow2017 · 07/01/2020 23:55

Really you would take money from toddlers so you could get a 2nd luxury holiday a year?
Wow!

ploughingthrough · 08/01/2020 00:10

I wouldn't do this. I would put their money in an ISA or savings account seeing as it's theirs - they'd appreciate money in the future more than a cottage holiday they won't remember.

BillHadersNewWife · 08/01/2020 00:25

Gosh I am a bit surprised of the YABU, to be honest. I think it is a great thing for you to do, use the money for a family get a-way. Everyone benefits.

I'm a bit surprised at the YANBU's! I think it's super-weird that some parents feel they have a right to spend their child's money on a family treat! As for "everyone benefits" well that's not really the POINT of giving money to one child is it?

If I give money to a relative's child, I expect that money to be spent on something the child wants or saved up for something the child chooses itself in the future.

No wonder there are all these child stars suing their parents for misappropriated earnings! It seems many people think it's fine to spend money that belongs to a child!

FamilyOfAliens · 08/01/2020 07:10

Really you would take money from toddlers so you could get a 2nd luxury holiday a year?

The OP has made it clear she sees this money as just another pot of money to dip into when the adults fancy an extra holiday and want to dress it up as quality time together as a family.

minesagin37 · 08/01/2020 07:23

No you should have saved. If you can't afford it now what's to say you are going to be able to replenish their money. That will become a low priority as you tell yourself you need something else later in the year.

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 08/01/2020 07:30

Family time together what could be more fun

A two year old won’t care if they are home or away in a cottage in winter. You don’t need a holiday to have family time Hmm

Just strengthens my resolve to continue with the no cash/voucher rule unless I take the child out myself to spend it. When I gift something to a child it’s for them not the parents.

HoorahHilda · 08/01/2020 07:35

Perfectly fair-have fun!
Some of the responses on this thread are hilarious...

FamilyOfAliens · 08/01/2020 07:44

Perfectly fair

What definition of “fair” are you using here?

Is it ok for parents to use money gifted to their children of any age? If my mum gives my DS £50 for his birthday, can I use it towards a family holiday?

Or is it only ok if the child is too young to understand that their parents have taken their gift and put into the family holiday fund?

FamilyOfAliens · 08/01/2020 07:44

DS is 21 btw.

ssd · 08/01/2020 08:36

I'm curious why you even asked here. It's obvious you were going to use it, did you ask so you could justify it in your head by calling what you use it for a different name? Eg. We will use the kids £300 for activities we fancy that toddlers can come to, or we'll be honest and use it to pay the holiday we want?

Same difference really.

nakedavengeragain · 08/01/2020 08:46

Good grief yes. They haven't got a clue and can't tell you how to spend it. If they could it would be on crap anyway. I'd shove £30 in their savings every month until next Xmas to make up for it though.

BlouseAndSkirt · 08/01/2020 08:56

the adults fancy an extra holiday and want to dress it up as quality time together as a family

That’s what a holiday is Confused

OvalCanvas · 08/01/2020 09:26

Go to Butlins to see Mr Tumble instead. You get the half board dining , and a break from cooking , the kids get their kid friendly holiday. After all , they're paying.

I bet that option isn't so appealing to you.

BlouseAndSkirt · 08/01/2020 09:48

Why does ‘kid friendly’ have to mean Mr Tumbles and Butlins? I mean, they are kid friendly but not the only kid-friendly options.

The OP will doubtless spend many hours of their childhood at kid friendly, parental hell attractions and events, sometimes a holiday can be nice for all.