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Asking a Friend for Money Back

16 replies

mooneus · 13/02/2017 14:48

So last year I bought tickets to see Beyonce for me and friend. She wanted to go and said she would pay me back (£80).

This was in July, the same month she was also offered a place at University and is now always telling me about how she has so money, etc.

It's been 7 months since the gig and while I do want the money back, I know she has to make a lot of sacrifices for her course.

I've never asked her directly for the money back as I don't want to cause any arguments. In the past I have had massive rows with friends over money, and know it's not worth losing a friendship over.

However, on the other hand she should realise that I bought those tickets so we could enjoy a night together. She should at least offer to pay me back. I'm starting to think she's hoping I've forgotten about it and will get out of paying it back.

What would you guys do?

OP posts:
19lottie82 · 13/02/2017 14:53

If you want it back ask her.

I don't think you can get in a tizzy about it if you haven't even asked for it back.

iamapixiebutnotaniceone · 13/02/2017 14:55

If she doesn't pay it back whether you ask or not it is going to affect your friendship: you might as well ask!

SorrelSoup · 13/02/2017 14:59

Just ask. Ask for £20 per month and give her your bank details. She knows. That's a good deal; it acknowledges she's a poor student.

xyzandabc · 13/02/2017 15:09

You say she should offer to pay you back?? Sounds like money has not been mentioned before in the 7 months since the gig??
What was the understanding when you bought the tickets in the 1st place? Did you say at the time 'oh by the way that'll be £80' or did you just say 'I've got these tickets, do you want to come?'

mooneus · 13/02/2017 15:16

No I haven't asked for it back, because she reminds me every so often that she has no money to do anything - once she has paid for food, travel etc. she has pretty much next to nothing leftover.

We both wanted to go as we're both fans. I said I'll pay for the tickets with my card. It's not like me to directly ask for the money, but why would she think I was going to pay for her to go? We've been to gigs before where I've bought the tickets and she's paid me back

OP posts:
FinallyHere · 13/02/2017 15:25

but why would she think I was going to pay for her to go

Well, looked at from her point of view, it's worth a try, isn't it. If you can possibly afford to, I'd chalk it up to experience in this case and remind yourself, next time you offer to pay for something, how this worked out. If you do want to be helpful, and use your card, think about how to get a payment plan in place.

I learned this the hard way, so now only offer if I really mean that I am happy to pay. I've noticed, though, that the really nice friends do infact pay me back and it's the not so nice ones that don't. Just a thought.

Crinkle77 · 13/02/2017 17:57

I would forget about it now. Too much time has passed however I wouldn't pay for anything for her again unless I got the money first.

Lottie4 · 14/02/2017 11:10

She went ahead with the university course knowing she owed you the money. You need to remind her and tell her you could do with the money yourself for other things. If money really is tight, then she could give you a small amount each time you see her. She might be your friend, but she's not being fair.

kath6144 · 14/02/2017 12:09

My DD paid for some tickets for her and a friend a couple of weeks ago, DD16 and friend 17. The friend gave her the money in an envelope the very next day at college.

Why didn't you ask for it back before the concert? My DD's friends would not have been going if the money hadn't been forthcoming, tickets emailed to my DD, so who goes is under her control.

It is difficult, as generally you need to book on 1 card to get seats together, but you should have ensured you were repaid before the actual concert. You may have to chalk it up to experience and make it a big lesson learnt.

flowery · 14/02/2017 12:17

"She wanted to go and said she would pay me back (£80)."

When was she going to pay you back? Has that time come and gone without either of you saying anything?

Flipthebirdy · 14/02/2017 12:30

She hasn't forgotten and she should have addressed it. I think you should ask her about it and if she's a really close friend and you know that she is indeed struggling for money then I would tell her not to worry about it and that that when he has more money she can treat me in return.

RedHelenB · 14/02/2017 12:33

Agreed - money should have been given to you befoire the coincert otherwise you should have sold the ticket!

mooneus · 15/02/2017 20:59

I don't think we ever agreed a time to pay it back. I think I was so caught up in the moment of actually going to see Beyonce that I didn't really care about the money - I just wanted to go.

OP posts:
omnishamblesssssssssssssss · 15/02/2017 22:15

Just text her something like 'lots of birthdays to buy for, really need that £60 back this month please'

omnishamblesssssssssssssss · 15/02/2017 22:19

Or 'Need the £80 back next month by the way. Various financial commitments coming up'

FinallyHere · 16/02/2017 13:37

If you di ask for the money back, don't get it muddled up with when you need it by. Just ask 'when were you planning on paying me back for the tickets'. All the best.

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