Mouse you said something in you opening post that struck me....
They accept the part time job for the wife as his full time job
The magic word in your post was as - like as if his full time job is her salary. You may be right.
This is the Achilles Heel, I suspect but more info may help. It seems that he may have placed his earnings into a company of which she is a director and sole shareholder (it is easy to do if you know what to do) and she may be drawing only a nominal income from it, writing other income off against costs, but other ways are possible to supress their earnings.
I do not mind love failing as long as people are complete with each other. That is life. (I just deleted the rest of my draft paragraph...haha too deep).
But to cheat financially is in my mind irrevocably unforgivable. Money doesn't matter in the bigger stuff, but when you have a family and if you have children and money then not meeting financial obligations is a cruel theft or failure of human responsibility, beyond the emotional running away. Because then it is really the small stuff.....eggs, laundered pants, petrol to school, toothpaste, cheese, trips* that they have to cope with when the weak partner has abandoned the family for their selfish needs. Which is always how it is, selfish in any analysis.
A man always looks after his family, wife, partner, children. Always they come first, it is nature. Really, it is inherent in us.
But if he cheats and doesn't look after his financial obligations, then he (and OW) probably have to answer in different ways. To HMRC, CSA, Family Law Courts, Chancery Division (OW perhaps....if she control the business). And so, why not.
Happy for you to PM me, if you like. May not be able to solve it all though. But I know what goes on.
Always Cogito is able to show amazing experiences and skills.... Thank you......:)
*And for any man or woman who has abandoned their financial obligations to their SAHM or SAHD or family - well just paying for those items, leave alone the mortgage and council tax and electricity and all the rest...are very real. Haha...that glass of wine with OW or OM in Paris, Polperro or Pathos has never felt so good...?!?