Can we have a nice, kind supportive gowd we are in so much debt type thread?

[grumpypants]

One where we can just be noice and not scathing? I am just always doing little sums in my head, about when things will be cleared, etc. We have sooo much debt. Interest only mortgage, can't afford repayment at the mo. Credit card - bought rubbish house, paid for work with 'real' money, living expenses on cards. Loan, car loan, overdraft etc. It's about £35k unsecured. We pay 1,000 each month in debt. I am so shocked by how this happened, but there are no expensive shoes peeking out the wardrobe; it's a combo of poor choice, me giving up work due to ill child, and the house falling apart just after we moved in...anyone else? I am trying so hard to cut down, and to pay stuff off - one day I really want to enjoy the money dh and I earn.

No idea - not sure you'd want advice from us anyway!

Maybe start a new thread. There are done very savvy people on mn.

Just wanted to say to everyone that there is light at the end of the tunnel. DH and I struggled after having DS and crippling childcare costs. DH business (self employed) went south, became depressed and I became the bread winner. DH couldn't cope with SAHD so still had to pay nursery and we had CC debts of £18.5k at one point, mortgage debt £220k (25% equity in house). However, DH has been working for someone else for 1.5 years and we have almost cleared debt. Now need to pay down mortgage. It was a struggle and DH didn't help as he lives for today. It really weighs you down.

DH may lose his job next month but DS is in school now so it won't be as bad as before as I've been promoted twice so have more income too.

Good luck with clearing the debt.

Lovely post. Thank-you.

I think in this economic climate you would need to be debt free for a year or two before you would get a mortgage at usual rates.

littlesue very glad for you x

We "only" have CC debt and the mortgage but its very worrying as due to dh's new rold at work I cannot look for work this year as I planned (he will be abroad travelling a lot). I had sort of counted on having some extra income.

Add the that moving and having to spend £4k in the first 2 months of being here (new boiler, leaky roof etc) has really NOT helped

thinner start a thread in money or property or look on the moneysavingexpert website...lots of good advice/knowledge.

littlesue hearing stuff like that does get you back on track, thank you!
I have also started a xmas etc fund. 225 every month to an account for the quarterly gas and electric, childcare fees and some for xmas. Hopefully this will work. Also put 400 over to pay for food bills, but already two shops have been over the 100 per week limit. Need a rethink.

Becaroo - your house sounds like ours! Caan see how some of your debt came about.

grumpy You have my sympathy!!! Its been a nightmare since we moved in December...boiler, roof, hob, sink, taps, fridge freezer, oven.....

All stuff that has to done too, nothing we can think "oh well we dont need heat or hot water or to eat hot food!!!"

Very, very fed up of it and it has spoilt the house for me in a way...I cant the (many) good points, only the money we have had to spend Feel pretty bitter wrt the previous owners too, which wont get me anywhere!!!

Am going to start the xmas fund so we will - hopefully - have a stash for that. Going on hols in the UK in July but thats it for us this year.

We have a sun holiday booked (the 9.50 one which actually was £100 odd quid in the end) and a camping trip too.

Should be great but very weather dependent unfortunately.

Yes, it will be lovely if we get the weather....rather grim if not!!

Can I ask a wwyd question?

At the end of this month we could pay off my parents who lent us £1k (towards the new boiler). We would then need to find £500 at the end of April though to pay for our holiday.

I would like to so this as it would mean one debt cleared and by the end of april our holiday paid for too.

I think its the best option albiet we would be poor as churchmice til end of May!!!

No i think you should pay back £500 and not £1000 otherwise you run the risk of overstretching and having to borrow it back?

Mmm I've been pondering this today

I personally feel that booking a holiday for £500 when £1k is owed to someone is a bit er disrespectful. I'm not criticising you for having a holiday. You've obvioulsy had a shit run of luck.

What do your parents think?

I'm not sure if I explained that right actually. I think I'm voting for the churchmice option; that's my point!

I think it depends entirely on your relationship with your parents. Eg dh and I borrowed 500 from his lat year and paid it back within 2 wks. Dh found it excruciating. Otoh, my mum has lent us loads and I am ok to buy the odd readymeal and pair of work shoes without tutting.

The biggest problem I've had with parental help has actually come from my siblings. They have had exactly the same amount as me, but spent differently according to different circumstances. It's them that have their judgey pants hoiked up high. Dickheads.

Sorry, should have said holiday was booked last year prior to all the crap happening! Thinking of cancelling it anyway and saving up for next year....

Had a word with mum yesterday about it and she says they arent bothered when they get the money back...which is good in a way but I dont like having it hanging over my head IYSWIM?

I know what you mean re: siblings - my mum does play us off against each other sadly No doubt they all know about my financial affairs...sigh...

Oh no that's shit - how much has been paid already/how much would you lose?

As for family/siblings - I have no valuable opinion on this. I have siblings that love to judge us, and I am so aware of it, I never have a normal conversation with them any more.

I am always censoring what I say.

We are losing nearly £400

So thats half of dh's bonus this month gone.

We just cannot get a break atm!

I dont care what my siblings think of me so not worried on that score, but just hate the way my mum plays us off against each other...I have very much stepped back from the relationship for that reason.

My siblings and I have very little to say to each other bar pleasantries tbh.

My Dh just got paid. £140 less than what I budgeted

bollox

Are you definitely going to sacrifice the holiday??

smacka Yeah...its cancelled

My kids are so great...instead of being stroppy about no hols ds1 said "Dont worry mummy we can save up and go on hols next year" He is 8.

I am going to have a chat to dh when he gets back and am planning lots of lovely days out over easter and the summer...NT annual family membership is £70 which means free parking and entry to all NT properties....lots of picnics I think!!!!

Ds1 also wants to go to a couple of historical sites too which we will do (think battlefields!!)

New cooker being put in as I type! Hurrah!! No more guessing how long to cook things for! The chaps putting it in are a bit nonplussed at the wiring sigh...every damn thing the previous owners did was a botch job

Sorry to hear that dh's wages are down this week Are his wages different every week/month?...that must make it really tough to budget

I have - in effect - got a new kitchen for under £1k (new oven, hob, f/f, sink, taps, worktop)....not bad really

Just the halls, stairs and landing to decorate (think 1980s anaglypta wallpaper painted urine yellow) and get the carpet cleaned and I am DONE - at least til the next thing breaks/falls off/explodes!!!

well, we got the insurance money and we can cover the cost of replacing everything with it, thank goodness (none left, but still). Just realised that when my job goes next year, and we lose CB, i will be 1042 down each month. Shite. Really need to come up with something in the way of a plan! and obv, petrol and childcare (prob 350 pcm will go too) - really pissed off about cb actually. someone on here worked out that they would be losing x years at x pounds - and its a massive loss.

Me too gp I lose CB next year too.

Just dont know where the money is going to come from to replace it...cant really look for work either with dh's new role..sigh.

Hi all

Just wanted to pop on and say hi (previously areyoumad), we seem to be on the up at the moment, however the soddind car is being a git and will cost us a couple of hundred pounds to fix.

Argh, if it's not one thing it's another.

hi - yes, i am just keeping afloat until the end of march to see how much we get and what we can do. i am desperate to start paying the mortgage. glad things are goodish tho.

Luckily we earn nowhere near enough to lose CB. It's all gone a but quiet though. I wonder whether it'll actually happen.

DS is potty training now, so fingers crossed the energy (and chocolate button) bills don't shoot up as the cost of nappies decreases.

Oh and said DS has just given me 5p he found down the sofa. That's my boy!