ttc after placental abruption

[sayitwithsam]

Arrggghhhhh!!!!!! Another month gone and I still haven't had a strong positive on the OPK. My period was 35 days last month and 33 this month.
I'm worried that I'm not ovulating every cycle and that's why it took over a year to get pregnant the first time. My GP said not to worry about it though, that it will happen when it happens. It's so easy to be blase when you're not the person desperate for a baby.
I spent most of yesterday in fits of tears. I thought I'd never stop. It's been like this on the first day of all my periods since losing my baby. I feel like it's all happening again and I'm back in that hospital room.
It's my brother-in-laws wedding in October and I should be there with my little boy, showing him his new family and beaming with pride but now I'll be surrounded by all these people giving me sympathetic smiles and whispering behind my back.
Everyone keeps saying I will get my baby which makes me feel like they don't think my boy was real, or that he didn't matter. It has to get better than this doesn't it?
I want to be pregnant again so badly but I worry like mad that if I do I'll be expecting the same baby I lost. Has anyone else felt like this?

Thanks. Am still frantically checking myself. There's been tons of very sticky, blobby yellow tinged mucus since I bled. I'm trying to remember what the plug looked like but at the same time not remember! Like you said, nothing can be done right now anyway. She said there was a big plug in place when she examined me this morning so hopefully it's not that.

I'm back again. Hope you're still around!
TTC AGAIN after second miscarriage in October. Had one normal period last month and this month I bled on day 18 and had strong twinges around my hips with no high or ovulation day detected on my monitor. Then finally ovulated on day 24. Now the TWW.
I need to talk to people to keep the madness at bay.