Miscarriage

[Ruthsoph]

Hi all
I recently had a scan at 7 weeks and there was no heartbeat so had to go back a week later to check and still no heartbeat so I am now faced with letting the miscarriage come naturally, medical or surgical
Can't face waiting for it to happen and it's now been 3 weeks so what did other opt for - I did think medical but then I couldn't face if it didn't work and then with surgical I was told that this could effect future pregnancy's??
Any advice would be greatly appreciated x

Sorry to hear, don't have any advice but we're all here for you x

So sorry to hear this, I've had surgery today for my 3rd missed miscarriage and I've found its the gentlest as the tablet's did not work and I didn't want the anxiety of waiting for it to happen naturally. In the most difficult situation you know when it will be with the surgery and can give some little bit of closure. I've been very well looked after today. If there is anything else you'd like to ask just say. Sending you a virtual hug. Xx

Lauraliverpool big hugs to you - it's such a terrible situation - this will be my second miscarriage the first came away naturally but this one has been 3 weeks already and I just want it over now - I did think surgery as the way my luck goes I would worry the tablet wouldn't work
Xxx

@Ruthsoph hugs Can we have a cry together?
I'm so sorry to find you here. We were on the November thread together and now we're here together too.

I can understand where you are coming from as you can't find some closure. I found surgery was the kindest way as previously having tablets which did not work did not want to go through that again and I didn't want to wait for it to naturally happen. Xxx

@Littleseed I am so sorry for you I had no idea - one minute we were talking excitedly about our upcoming scan and then this - I left the group, didn't even say why just left - I have decided on the surgical the nurse said they would then take a sample and send to the London hosp as it had been my 3 miscarriage in total and test to see if they can tell why. But I agree with @Lauraliverpool It is the kindest option
It's such a sad time as you are grieving for the memories that didn't even happen.
Big hugs to you both xx

That's what we have given consent for to and this time there will be genetic testing too. We have also being referred to the recurrent miscarriage clinic just waiting for the appointment letter to come. Big hugs. Xx

Hi girls.. have left the November thread. Heart is broken how are yous? X

@FirstTimeMama91 I am so sorry for you xx Yes I am completely heartbroken too - my body still feels pregnant but knowing that I am not is heartbreaking - I am booked in for Tuesday for a surgical so hopefully after that I can have some kind of closure - it's all just so very very sad - lots of love xxx

@Ruthsoph Awk god help you it's just the worst thing. I've to go back to hospital tomorrow. I thing I passed everything yesterday but they're not sure it might be ectopic. I don't know how everything can just change and be turned upside down in a few days... it's just so unfair. Big hugs to you too Hun xx

Finding it hard to come to terms and accept what has happened. Taking this week off work to just rest and heal. How long is the 'norm' to take off work? I told a lot of people in workthat I was pregnant and just can't face telling them my news

Exactly the same, cried just now and haven't since Friday. Take as long off work as you need, don't be rushing to go back. X

@Lauraliverpool it's the worst thing. Nothing prepares you for this x

@FirstTimeMama91 it is very much so. X

@Lauraliverpool I miss being pregnant. This time last week everything was perfect x

I was never told there was an issue re surgery and future pgs. I did have an erpc and then a natural (very early) mc followed by ds2.

So sorry to see the pain everyone here is going through

I know it's horrible, even more so when you are told no heartbeat. X

@Ruthsoph hugs I had no idea either- until I came to this section of the forum and saw your thread.

I also left the November group without saying a word. I originally intended to post an update - I felt I owed it to some, but then thought it isn't nice for the rest to be reading about a MC whilst pregnant. So I left and never went back.

You're 100% right. You're grieving memories that haven't even happened.
I think you definitely opted for the best choice darling. How did everything go yesterday?

@Lauraliverpool hugs to you too. It is so sad and heartbreaking. How are you today?

@FirstTimeMama91 I am so sad to see you here! 3 of us now. So so heartbreaking. How did your hospital appointment go?
I'm glad you're taking the week off- it's definitely needed. It is very hard- physically, mentally, emotionally.

You remember the day every time it comes round- every week.

thinking of you all. xxx

@Littleseed I'm ok it's a week today that we had our scan and got told the baby had not grown. How are you? Xx

@Ruthsoph how are you? Xx

hey ladies - yesterday went as well as it could and recovery has been ok, not much bleeding or pain - just feel pretty empty. The nurse told me that they will send some of the fetus ( or baby as i like to refer to it) will be sent to the london for testing and the rest they cremate - did you know this? she also told me they do a service at the hosp once a month for prayers etc for this sort of thing so i will go to that as i think that may help.
i am defo going to try again - i read that after these experiances you are more fertile - last time i had a mc i waited like 6 months to try but this time i will try much sooner
what are you guys going to do?
lots of love xx

Hi, we consented to our baby having the testing done and they are going to do genetic testing as well and we have consented for communal cremation. We have been asked that we don't try to get pregnant until after being seen at the miscarriage clinic. I too have been told you are more fertile after a miscarriage. I know it is never easy but I'm glad to hear yesterday went as well as it could in these circumstances. Lots of love to you. Xx

@Lauraliverpool - whats the miscarriage clinic? i wasnt told about that? i was just told any heavy bleeding then come back and thats it.
and typically everywhere i seem to go lately i see pregnant women. One minute i feel ok and then i remember and feel incredibly sad and my other half has been great but its just not the same for men
xx

@Littleseed @Ruthsoph I know so sad I think we're going to start trying early. I just can't wait. I bought some pregnancy tests today. Going to do one at the weekend, hopefully get a negative then just going to start trying next week.

@Ruthsoph there is a recurrent miscarriage clinic at Liverpool women's hospital so when you have had 3 or more miscarriages you can be referred, there is where you have investigations done to try and find out why. When we had to go last Wednesday the lady who did the scan is is charge of this particular clinic and she referred us the same day, I think usually you have to go through your GP for this to happen but fortunately we didn't. Three people I know are pregnant and everywhere you turn you see pregnant women. X