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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

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Original poster

Miscarriage at 8 weeks

15 replies

Enigma1975 · 12/05/2016 13:24

Hello,

An early scan two weeks ago (after spotting and cramping) showed a heartbeat but something didn't look right, so back for another scan this morning. We were told that the baby had died sometime in the last 2 weeks.

I wanted surgical management but the earliest that could be done was Wednesday, so changed my mind and went for the medical option. Pessaries went in this morning and now back at home with cramps, waiting to miscarry.

This baby was very much planned and wanted - I'm 41 so was thrilled that everything worked! Obviously gutted now, and rather scared about whats going to happen over the next day or so....

My other half is here with me - mostly keeping it real with his appalling sense of humour ;-)

Anyway, just wanted to share, thank you xx

OP posts:

rider1975 · 12/05/2016 18:13

Hi Enigma born in the wonderful year of 1975. Just wanted to relay my condolences and say I know exactly how you feel and I was in the same situation. I'm just hoping to manage to conceive again.
I hope you have a straight forward experience with your medical management. Mine happened on Tuesday night and it was first day back at work today - still very very tired.
Sending lots of love 💐💐
Ps. My boyfriend is the same - driving in the positive lane - bless him

Original poster

Enigma1975 · 12/05/2016 18:21

Thanks rider, I really appreciate your kind words. So sorry to hear about your loss.

It's a very strange situation and not sure how I'm meant to be feeling. This may sound weird but I really wish it would all hurry up though (still cramping on and off but no bleeding).

I hope your first day back at work wasn't too awful and that you manage to relax a bit tonight x

OP posts:

fuzzywuzzy · 12/05/2016 18:30

Enigma, I'm so sorry for your loss.

I've just come home from a surgical management of my missed miscarriage, I should have been eleven weeks on Monday and baby measure seven weeks and there was no heartbeat.

I'm 38, and this is my fifth miscarriage over the last twelve months, feeling so so upset, as this was also a very much longer for baby.

DP also keeping things going by being annoyingly jovial and making terrible jokes, he's taken over all household stuff so I'm just taking it easy.

I hope you get thro the managed procedure, you're not alone, I was given lots of literature about it and my work has suggested I get grief counselling thro them.
I'm feeling so sad right now.

Wish you the best xx

Original poster

Enigma1975 · 12/05/2016 18:35

So sorry to hear your story fuzzy. I can't imagine what a horrendous time you must have had over the last year.

Thinking of you x

OP posts:

rider1975 · 12/05/2016 18:56

Mine took 13 hours to start - I know what you mean. I was terrified too beforehand.
fuzzywuzzy - my heart goes out to you - so glad you have a sympathetic employer and half-full-cup OH

Original poster

Enigma1975 · 13/05/2016 08:54

Well, all kicked-off last night - I've never seen so much blood in my life. I thought I was vaguely prepared for what would happen but clearly not! Feel utterly exhausted and pretty wobbly this morning.

Thanks for all of your kind words yesterday x

OP posts:

Sop76 · 13/05/2016 11:55

Hi Enigma,

I'm sorry you are going through this as well. Sounds like we are in a similar position. Yesterday I was told no hope at 8 weeks (after a horrible 2 weeks of maybe) and I'm now waiting! I think I will opt for surgery if nothing happens naturally. It sounds like last night was hideous but good that it's started. I feel like I really want this to happen quickly so I can try and move on. This is my third pregnancy loss in 12 months (IVF) so I am really over this! Felt quite angry and defiant yesterday but today I just feel shit and sad! Hope the bleeding is easing up.

Hayhay123 · 13/05/2016 12:11

Sorry to hear about your losses. I have miscarried at 8 weeks also. Although mine is slowly happening itself rather than finding out at a scan. This is my first miscarriage so I have no experience to draw on and I am overly private so have no one to talk to about this (other than OH who is useless).
It's not nice we all have to deal with this kind of thing :(
X

Original poster

Enigma1975 · 13/05/2016 12:49

Sop76 and Hayhay - so sorry to hear you are both going through this also.

Sop76 - I know what you mean about waiting. Last night was brutal but - for me - I'm relieved that I'm now recovering as my first option for surgery was Wednesday next week.

Just got the most beautiful bouquet of flowers from one of my friends too which has really moved me. Today will be a better day for me.

OP posts:

fuzzywuzzy · 13/05/2016 15:01

So very sorry you're all going thro this.

I found the surgical management was best for me, I want it to be over quickly. Anyone who does opt for surgical management make sure you ask at the hospital for painkillers, I really needed them last night and a hot water bottle was in agony.

Thankfully there's not much bleeding so far. Hopefully will be over soon.

Enigma make sure you eat well and rest as much as possible, having so much blood loss really takes its toll. I also take a course of floradix for a while to keep my iron levels steady. And I find I need the extra boost.

Original poster

Enigma1975 · 16/05/2016 17:49

Hello all. 4 days after the miscarriage and still feeling a bit strange. Had a chat to one of the doctors at the hospital but they weren't overly helpful...

Physically I feel pretty much ok but very quickly exhausted as soon as I do anything. I do still feel very sore though - specifically around my cervix (or where I think that is!). Bit stingy, no pain, but mostly just uncomfortable. I assume this is normal?!! Dr just said everyone is different :-/ Also really upset tum! Had it whilst pregnant too - still on and off.

I've told my boss I'll be back at work Wednesday as I feel a bit of a fraud being off any longer.... And I can't cope with anymore daytime TV (on the plus side I made bread this morning though!) ;-)

Has anyone else experienced the same soreness / upset tum?

Thanks xxx

OP posts:

findingmyfeet12 · 17/05/2016 11:47

Fuzzy I know you from antenatal and conception threads. I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm waiting for first af after my miscarriage.

I hope you're recovering OP. Ours was also a much longed for baby after 9 years of infertility and lots of treatment.

Sop76 · 17/05/2016 13:26

Enigma I'm glad you are recovering OK. I have my op booked in for tomorrow - quite scared despite all the assurances that's it's OK. It's horrible that you have to go on your own as well! Anyway - small rant, my boss called me today to say that I've no authorised sick pay left (I had an ectopic preg in Nov and a couple of weeks off). Seems so harsh given what has happened. Means I'll probably go straight back to work if not Thursday then Friday as I can't afford unpaid leave - this really sucks! It's so crap as she was kind of saying it like I brought it on myself because I've had IVF - I wanted to yell at her that this could happen to anyone!

Original poster

Enigma1975 · 17/05/2016 13:43

Oh no Sop76, that's horrible. Poor you - I really feel for you. I'll have everything crossed for you tomorrow - it will be OK.

Thinking of you x

OP posts:

Sop76 · 17/05/2016 14:01

Thanks enigma - good luck for your return to work xx

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