Please or to access all these features

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Need advice on coping with difficult situation

5 replies

lexi12 · 10/04/2016 20:26

Hi all,

A bit of background on me, I have a beautiful dd who is 3 but have been trying to have a second baby for around 2 years now. I've lost 5 in total.

This is where I need advice. My best friend has confided in me that she is pregnant. Very early days still but she's in the process of moving and has only been seeing the dad of her baby for a couple of months. She's told me because her rship is still new and she's moving to a 1 bed she can't have a kid right now (fine), so she's getting an abortion. Now I want to be a good friend to her and have offered to go with her so she's not alone. But because of my current journey I'm struggling. I don't know what to say to her or even act. I have been avoiding friends who are pregnant and have always found excuses not to meet up etc. I feel she was rather unfair giving me this information but I have no idea how to cope.

Any advice? Please?

OP posts:
MissSmiley · 10/04/2016 20:46

So sorry for your losses. Does she know what you've been through? If she does I think it's strange that's she's put you in this situation. She must see you as a very good friend. Does she have any other close friends?

MissSmiley · 10/04/2016 20:48

Sorry missed answering your question about coping. I don't think it's going to be easy for you to cope with this. The best thing would be if someone else could go with her. You need to think about yourself. You've been through so much.

Chottie · 10/04/2016 20:51

Whilst you obviously feel for your friend, this is one time when you need to put yourself and your needs first. Please be kind to yourself.

I am so sorry to hear of your lost babies Flowers

lexi12 · 10/04/2016 21:40

She does know my journey. She knows exactly how it's effected me physically and mentally. Which is why I feel she's put me in such a hard place. I honestly don't think she's thought it through and where it's going to put me. I really wish she hadn't told me. I wish I was still ignorant to it all. She's taking another friend with her and I've told her what my early losses were like, I'm guessing it's similar to what she will have to do, although I have no idea really.

OP posts:
caza25 · 10/04/2016 22:14

I am so sorry for your losses. This must be a very difficult situation for you. But you need to look after yourself. Your friend is probably just confused at the minute. I am sure she will understand if you said you can't go.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page