NHS miscarriage care

[MumtoAnna]

I found out yesterday at an u/s that my baby's heartbeat has stopped but my local hospital couldn't give me an appointment for a d&c until 6 days later. I think this is an awfully long time to wait. I can't help thinking if I lived in America or France that the care would be given much quicker. It is painful enough to have lost the baby but to have to go nearly a week knowing that it's no longer living is making it all so much harder to cope with. Has anyone else experienced this with the nhs?

I am pretty disillusioned overall at the ep care I have received from the nhs. Why are the ep centres not open at weekends? After my scan and the terrible news yesterday we were kept waiting in a room nearly an hour and a half for a doctor to come when all we wanted to do was go home. I know dealing with miscarriage is common for them but it is not common for us as individuals.

I'm so sorry that you've lost your baby. It can be a devastating thing to go through, and I'm sorry that you didn't get the compassionate care you deserved yesterday.
I think your experience is common. I have had 4MC and never got an ERPC even though it would be my preference because I've always MC in the meantime, though in some cases it can be weeks after the baby dies that a MC starts that hasn't been the case for me. In America or France you would be a (directly) paying customer and that does make a difference. I don't think you are bring put medically at risk by waiting, but it is very tough emotionally.
The Mon-Fri mornings thing is ridiculous. There are so many posts on here from women who experience bleeding over the weekend and can't access services. I know there is often nothing that can be done to affect the outcome of a threatened miscarriage but being promptly seen and understanding what is happening would make a painful process easier to bear.
When you feel strong enough it is worth writing constructively to EPU about your experience. As a frequent flyer over the last 7 yrs at my local one I can see that they have worked to improve things. Having a doctor/nurse practitioner/midwife available to talk to someone who has been given bad news ASAP is something they should be aiming for. It must be a tough job working there, I'm sure the only way they can cope is to medicalise it and not take on too much of people's emotions, but a little compassion, and acknowledging the impact of the news for you, would go a long way.
Many of us here to hold your hand as necessary over the next weeks.

You poor poor thing. I'm so sorry for your loss.

I've been through a similar situation recently. I waited 2 weeks for an ERPC following my mmc at 12 weeks. This seemed so horrendous and unkind at the time. However, it is in response to a change in national nice guidelines. I think it is to a. Confirm the diagnosis (just incase you are earlier than you thought for some reason) and b. it gives you the best possible chance to have a natural misc.

In hind sight the wait wasn't too bad and actually allowed me to mental prepare and accept that my baby had died.

I'm sorry you haven't found the care acceptable. Maybe it's worth trying to talk to your gp. They can often call up on your behalf and find out directly what can be done to help you?

I also had lots of waiting around. Sadly it's just the nature if the nhs :( I hope you get kind and compassionate care. Best of luck

Thanks to you both for your replies and I'm sorry you have had to go through this too. I'm just trying to keep busy and not think about it too much, but the waiting is horrible. I think you are both right, it is a sad indication of the state of our nhs that women need to wait so long for this treatment, and I think I will write to the hospital afterwards to give them my feedback, as there is definitely much that could be improved upon. Your comments are much appreciated, it's comforting to know you are not alone in these experiences xx

Lots of love. You will get through it, not that it feels like it now.

I think writing a letter is a great idea. :)