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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

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Original poster

ERPC on Monday at 6am- some practical questions..

20 replies

omri · 01/03/2013 22:57

How will i physically feel after? I've had the past week off work to have a medically managed miscarriage but pills didn't work for me - I haven't started bleeding (took pills a week ago). So if I'm having the ERPC on Monday morning- will I be ok for work on Wednesday? I think I've had my grieving time during this week..
And.. Should I be nervous??

OP posts:

browneyesblue · 01/03/2013 23:01

I felt okay physically afterwards, although they did make sure that I had someone with me for the 24 hours afterwards just incase. I felt emotionally wobbly though, so if possible I would leave the door open to take extra time if you need it.

I'm so sorry for your loss x

browneyesblue · 01/03/2013 23:05

sorry - there's no need to be nervous, but it's perfectly understandable if you are. It was all very straightforward, and the doctors and nurses were gentle and understanding.

misslaughalot · 01/03/2013 23:07

omri so sorry you're going through this.

I had an erpc just over a year ago. Afterwards I felt physically fine. I left hospital about 4pm having had the op at about 7.30am. I was nervous about having a general anaesthetic but I think that was just because I'd never had one before. It was someone here who said it felt like 10 seconds passing from falling asleep to being woken that made me feel better about it, and they were right.

Will you have someone with you on the day? For me it really helped that DP spent the day with me as I was quite ready afterwards and couldn't wait to get home and he helped take my mind off it.

misslaughalot · 01/03/2013 23:07

I was quite teary afterwards, not ready. Damn autocorrect.

IRCL · 02/03/2013 00:34

I was OK (well as OK as you can be!) Felt a bit tired but think that was due to being under.

I did have some excruciating cramps a few hours later though but don't know if that was just my experience though.

Sorry to hear you're going through this. X

icklemssunshine1 · 02/03/2013 05:49

So sorry for your loss omri. I had a MMC at 11 weeks and had an ERPC Wednesday. I went into hospital at 12pm, placed on a bay on my own where the staff where lovely and supportive. I was on the operating table at 3pm and fully awake by 4. I had period-like pain and when I sat up to eat I felt a little "gush" (sorry for tmi!) but that physically was as bad as it got. I was home by 8pm. I took paracetamol Weds night but by Thurs night I was fine - didn't even have to wear sanitary towels, just panty liners are fine. Touch wood it continues that way. Was even able to manage a run yesterday! Emotionally it's a different matter. I'm going back to work Weds but physically I could return Monday, just want some "me" time before then.

Hope everything goes well - please ask if you have any questions. MN was (and is) a lifeline to get though this tough time.

nellyjelly · 02/03/2013 05:55

Do 't rush back to work. These things catch up with you. Yes the procedure is quick. Can be tough emotionally, feels very final. I sat waiting on the trolley waiting for it all to start and began to sob...........i thought I was over the grief too.

MrsJohnDeere · 02/03/2013 12:58

I felt spaced out with the after effects of the anaesthetic for the first 48 hours. When that wore off I felt wretched for about a week. After that I felt broadly ok but not back to fully normal until about 6 weeks afterwards, although much of that is the emotional side of things too. I found that if I did too much I paid for it afterwards.

If you work I would take at least one week off, probably two.

No need to be nervous though. The op itself is as fine as these things can be.

Littlemissexpecting · 02/03/2013 13:07

I would take the week off tbh. I have has 3 erpcs and one I went back to work 2 days later. The next one I took the week and felt much better for it.
Sorry your having to go through it

Original poster

omri · 02/03/2013 20:43

Oh my goodness thank you all for your replies. It's funny... I don't have any close friends who have been through this (that I know of) and I have felt quite lonely through this experience. To get one reply last night felt great and to get so many today makes me feel much more comforted. Thank you all for taking the time to get back to me. I don't feel so nervous about it now.
Will take the few days off work after too. Dp won't be with me after the surgery- has to go home to mind ds. He'll pick me up later though. To be honest I don't mind. Will have a few hrs to myself to just sob my heart out (one more time) if I need to...

It makes me think. I nearly want to tell all my friends that I've had a miscarriage next time I see them. Only because in the past week I've been thinking I'd love to call someone in RL who has been through this and have a chat with them. It means if any of my friends ever have to go through this (hopefully never) they know someone they can pick the phone up to have a cry and a chat about whatever they're feeling or worrying about...

OP posts:

nearlyreadytopop · 02/03/2013 21:06

Hi Omri, im so sorry about your miscarriage. Just wanted to thank you for this thread. I'm booked for ERPC on Monday morning too and have been getting more and more nervous about it. I was wondering about when to go back to work as well. Part of me just wants life to go back to normal.

holidaysdistantmemory · 02/03/2013 21:22

I went through this last year, and was physically fine 24 hrs later. I did need someone to pick me up from hospital, and was home to see my kids to bed which was nice. And yes, to my surprise I told everyone, I found it a strange relief to not hold it in and to treat it being something I should be ashamed or guilty about (because it wasn't and nothing I could have done to prevent it), and soon became apparent that it had happened to loads of people in rl I know too. Good luck. A mmc is a truly horrible experience. Not sure if this helps, but a small silver lining for me is that I am now pregnant with twins, which would have never happened if that little bean had survived, fate eh. X

MrsJohnDeere · 02/03/2013 21:25

I too found it easier to tell people about the MMC. I hadn't told anyone about being pg. What surprised me was just how many of my friends had been through the same at some point and I'd had no idea.

Bakingtins · 03/03/2013 15:46

Omri and nearlyready hope it all goes smoothly tomorrow.

I think if you decide to tell you'll be surprised how many people have been through it, it just doesn't get talked about. It's nothing to be ashamed of and may help people be more considerate of your feelings. I have massively compartmentalised 2nd time around, only my boss at work knows, and it was good to go to work, out on work hat and just get on with it, but I have told quite a few friends so plenty of people I can chat to if I need to.

Original poster

omri · 03/03/2013 23:04

Thanks again ladies for all the comforting replies. Nearly readytopop... Best of luck in the morn. Lets hold hands :) im lying here having a little cry here in bed- the finality of saying goodbye to my little beany baby tmrw is very sad :(

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cece · 03/03/2013 23:12

Take off as long as you need is my advice. Pg related absence is recored different to normal sickness so shouldn't affect your sickness record.

browneyesblue · 03/03/2013 23:43

My thoughts and love will be with you tomorrow ladies xx

nearlyreadytopop · 04/03/2013 08:46

omri, hope it all goes as well as it can. thank you bakingtins and browneyesblue
x

prettybird · 04/03/2013 08:58

I had two MMCs and two ERPCs after having ds.

One of the best bits of advice I got from a friend when I was going through my first one was to be kind to myself and to accept that my emotions would be all over the place (teary, angry etc) for a few weeks after as my hormones would be all over the place.

Original poster

omri · 04/03/2013 09:05

Thanks - that is good advice. I'll pass on same in future. Nearly ready- I'm in my gown now just waiting to be brought down. Just want it to be all over. Had a few tears this morn again. Thank goodness for mumsnet for comfort and distraction!!

Hope all goes well for you too. Will check in here again later tonight.

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