MMC at 11 weeks

[HeeHeeHeeBum]

I just need to talk about this. I woke up this morning with some bleeding. I have had this on and off for two weeks and this morning it was a little bit worse. The hospital didn't scan me when I first called them but today I was finally scanned. My baby had stopped developing at 9 weeks :( I have opted for a medical ERPOC but they can't fit me in until next week. I'm not sure what to do in the meantime. Can anyone share their experience of this? I broke down when the nurse explained it to me as I have a phobia of vomiting and she said I might.

Everything just seems so awful at the moment :(

Heehee . I'm so sorry this has happened to you , have never had a managed mc , just spontaneous ...just didn't want you to go unanswered

( hugs)

Hi heehee. So sorry you're going through this. I've had 2 mmc so know exactly how you feel - mine were at 12 wks & 9.5 wks. That's sk rubbish that you have to wait so long for the erpc. Are there any other local hospitals you could try? Or do you have private insurance as it often covers miscarriages?

I had an erpc each time and they were fine so please don't worry. I presume they meant you might be sick from the anaesthetic? I wasn't at all & was in fact starving after both ops as u have to fast before. This time I was just really sick from the pregnancy.

While you are waiting i'd suggest taking time off work and just spending time with your family & any friends that you feel able to tell. I only waited 2 days the 1st time & 4 this time but found watching mindless tv/films & being out in the countryside (away from people!) helped me although you have to do whatever you feel is right.

If you have any specific questions please feel free to ask or pm me xxx

Thanks droves teaandchocolate and Clementine79. I just can believe it. I knew it was a possibility but I didn't expect to walk out of there with it actually having happened. I will ask about the anti nausea drugs as I think that will help me through. My boss knows what has happened as is very understanding so I will definitely be taking a couple of weeks off. The waiting is the worst thing but there are no other hospitals I can try. My DH is wonderful so I think lots of hugs is what will get me through.

I'm so sorry you have been through it too :(

heeheehee i had to wait a week for my ERPC too. It was awful, the worst bit by far. I was worried about starting to pass it naturally at home and constantly monitored by bleeding, the sheer misery of knowing i'd been carrying around my dead baby for a few weeks already and then had to go a week longer was just awful. I didn't bleed very heavily that week but it was miserable, a constant reminder every time i changed a pad of what was happening and also i was scared to go out in case something bad happened. I did go out but not far , to be honest seeing babies and pregnant women in the town centre was difficult for a few weeks . I ate food i hadn't been able to when pregnant and drank a large glass of wine every night. I dyed my hair which was getting over run with greys as i'd not when pregnant- scared to hurt the baby! I stayed in and googled far too much and searched everywhere in books and online to see if i'd missed some nugget of information that would have told me how to prevent the MC. Of course i didnt find anything that i hadnt already known and hadnt already practiced.
The op itself was fine and a complete relief . I did not feel any nausea. I felt incredibly thirsty afterwards. I was groggy that day and slept most of the afternoon when i got home (i was discharged at noon) , still very tired the next day and for quite a while afterwards. My bleeding after the op was less heavy than what i was having before. so sorry you are going through this, its awful, one of the worst things a person can go through.

My mmc was discovered at NT scan at 11 +3, baby had died at 8+4.I had some warning as had bleeding start up 2 days prior to scan. apart from that i still felt very pregnant.

oh heehee, I really feel for you, I had a MMC last year. It was such an awful time I had the medical management then but more recently I had surgery for an ectopic pregnancy and didn't feel sick at all, just very tired. I'm sure they gave me an anti-nausea tablet, but it's all a bit hazy. Take care of yourself, I had 3 wks off work in the end and I needed all that time to get back to something approaching myself.

Thanks everyone. This is so hard. I just looked at facebook and burst into tears at all the baby pictures on there.

Just to clarify - it is the medical management I'm waiting for (it was called medical EPROC on the forms they gave me). I have the surgery if that doesn't work. Those that have experienced it - how long did it take to work? I have to go in tomorrow for a tablet and then on Thursday for the next stage. They said I can't go home until the miscarriage is complete. I just want it to be over with as quickly as possible. I'm terrified of passing it at home. What am I supposed to do if this happens? I'm rhesus negative too so I need to go into hospital for the anti-d injection.

Does anyone know how to make a week pass more quickly...

hi heehee, I had the medical management for a MMC. It was fine for me, it didn't actually hurt, though I suspect I was lucky, not sure how! They said I could have whatever pain relief I needed, so just ask.

I had the pessaries at 10am, passed the baby at 1pm, had tablets at 1pm and then I was home by 7pm. The worst part was the doc rummaging to get the last bits out at the end. Make sure they scan you at the end so you know everything is out. If you haven't had a mc before prepare yourself for a lot of blood and clots. It's messy. I'd had one before at home so was prepared and I much preferred to have it all done in hospital - you sit on what is basically a commode and it's all contained in there. I took a laptop with DVDs and DH and we just sat and watched DVDs. Don't do it on your own under any circumstances, at best it's boring. I also had a private room with ensuite, I would NOT want to do this on a ward.

Also I had the routine scan on the Thursday and 1st lot of tablets right there and then and went back in the next day for the rest of it. Why are they making you wait so long? It's mental torture . I'm rhesus negative as well, the injection is super quick. If it all starts up before you go in on Thursday (I can't get over how long they're making you wait) then call them. There is a thread somewhere with tips about how to make yourself more comfortable at home, I'll see if I can rootle it out if you need it.

Oh and I didn't vomit, didn't feel sick at all.

So sorry you're going through this. And stay away from FB! No good will come of looking at other people and their babies right now. Hugs. x

Thanks tasmaniandevilchaser, that erally helps as I like to know exactly what to expect. The waiting is horrible - part of the reason I chose the medical option was because it would be at least a two week wait for the surgical and I just can't bear to wait that long. I guess the hospital is not equipped for the number of women it deals with. They didn't even have a doctor available to see me after the sonographer had delivered the bad news. It will be a ward too unfortunately :(

Heehee, how are you? I'm really surprised at the waiting times at your hospital, esp for the surgery. 2 weeks?! I cant imagine you're in a place to think about complaining but if you have the energy at some point in the future, you could contact PALS. Sorry that's probably not helpful, it's not something you can change right now, so just put your energies into making this week bearable.

I'm so sorry you've got this awful wait. I got some box sets in while I was waiting around with the ectopic, it helped to pass the time. Are you on your own? Is there someone that can pop in to keep you company? Have you planned any nice things for yourself? Even if it's just eating ice-cream?

Thinking about when you go in, if you're on a ward, I would just get some tokens for the TV, though if you have a laptop with a good battery life you could take that in. Do you know what kind of ward it is?

Listen to clem don't read any horror stories on the internet, you don't need any more worry. I felt very looked after in hospital, but they didn't seem that busy. Also if it does start at home, at least you will have your home comforts. But you should get some good pain relief from hospital. I just had the co-codamol type meds, I didn't need anything more. TBH I've had worse period pains, but I think I was lucky. Maybe so totally in shock that I was quite relaxed in a weird way.

You will get through this, just be very kind to yourself.

Hi clementine and tasmanian. I went in for my first stage today and it passed naturally about 3 hours later when I was at home. I bled very heavily and was in a lot of pain so I ended up in A&E. I was very thoroughly examined by a gynaecologist who says I still have to go in for the next stage on Thursday as she couldn't be sure everything has been passed. She is sure the baby has now gone though :(

I have some stronger condeine for the pain which I need. I feel a certain sense of relief that this particular stage is over. I so wish I didn't have to go in again though.

Thank you for your kind words and advice.

oh heehee good to hear from you, how are you feeling now? I remember having mixed feelings - sad the baby is gone, relieved the baby is gone. Good that you have stronger pain killers, I'll dig out that thread where people have advice on managing at home, though I guess most of it is over now. Shame you have to go back in on Thursday, but they should scan you to make sure everything is out.

Be very kind to yourself, take as long as you need off work. You could make some loose plans for a treat or a day out or whatever you fancy that will relax you. I had acupuncture and also a massage, which was good for me. Take care

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/1344311-Tips-for-coping-with-the-practicalities-of-miscarriage

not sure if this will be useful now, but just in case....

Heehee

. I hope you feel better soon , and glad that you have good painkillers .

((hugs))

Heehee i'm so sorry this has happened to you but can understand your relief as well. Take care of yourself and rest properly.
I had a mmc at 11 weeks as well. Was due for a scan at week 13 and then things started going wrong. I was told at A&E after having a pinkish/brown discharge that my abdomen felt ok and that I might well be fine. The next day the scan revealed no foetus just the empty sac and lots of blood that they said would come out gradually. They were so matter of fact about it. The baby had probably stopped developing at 5 weeks. Anyway I was rushed back in with heavy bleeding the next day and kept for a few days but didn't need any intervention. I got pg again a few months later and have had 2 healthy babies since. It is so sad take it easy.

Thanks all. I got quite a good nights sleep thanks to the codeine but I feel a bit light headed today. I think I'm just going to rest and try to get an early night tonight before going to the hospital tomorrow. Hopefully tomorrow will go smoothly and I can start to put this behind me.

DH and I have talked about when to try again. Part of me wants to try straight away but another part wants to wait a couple of months. Has anyone conceived again before their cycles returned? Are there any dangers?

tasmanian that is an excellent thread, thanks for finding it.

think you can try again when you like, waiting one cycle has benefits - knowing your LMP is good for avoiding stress over dates (unless you KNOW when you ovulate). But you are supposed to be more fertile for 3-6 mths after a mc. So a reason to get cracking. I was DESPERATE to be pregnant again and started trying straight away. But there is something to be said for waiting until you feel strong. I was unlucky and the next time wasn't successful, but most people are lucky so do what you want! Hope you get a good night's sleep tonight and tomorrow goes well.x

Fortunately I didn't need the second stage of treatment. I was scanned and everything had gone. I really felt for the other women on the ward who had to go through with it.

That's good news heehee, hope you're feeling ok. I remember just feeling worn out by the stress and grief, just be very kind to yourself and remember, however shit you feel now, you won't feel like this forever. You will feel better one day soon.