Hi, sorry to everyone who has posted here and to all those who are going through this.
I had my third miscarriage last week (it was my second mmc), but I wish I had been able to read something like this thread the first time around. It would have helped enormously because no information I was given elsewhere helped much at all.
All the advice about having enough good quality pads and all of that with you is right - it's all very unpleasant and grim but easier to cope with if you have what you need to hand.
For me, staying close to home felt right. Even if things seem to be happening slowly, you don't know when it will kick off, and it can be so full-on during those worst hours that you will want to be somewhere safe and familiar.
For me, this time around, the worst of the physical part seemed over in one day. After some light bleeding I went to the EPU and a scan showed a pregnancy that was much earlier than my dates (6 weeks but I was 9 weeks). The couldn't offer me medical or surgical management as they had to re-test a week later to make sure it was not a case of incorrect dates (even though I was certain about my dates). The heavier bleeding started that night, and I kept having to go to the loo that night and throughout most of the next day. I passed a lot of blood and large (fist full) clots, and I was also in considerable pain. I went through pads every hour or so. I couldn't see if I passed the sac as the toilet was so full of blood.
But by the next next day it had eased considerably and was more like a period. After that it got very light, although I still have to wear pads as there are unexpected sort of 'surges'.
My first miscarriage lasted longer, at least in terms of the bleeding and passing of clots and tissue. I think that part when on for a number of days, but it was not as dramatically heavy. I could see the sad little bits I passed...
The middle one was by ERPC and although I was worried going into it, I found it the easiest physically. I woke up and it was all done and dusted (bar the sadness). I didn't have much in the way of pain or side effects.
Get the best pain relief you can get your hands on (legally, I mean 
). In both cases where I went through it naturally (I had one ERPC), the pain was worse than period pain, and more contraction like, but not at all as bad as labour pain. You are going through enough - you don't need the full whack of the pain as well (for me, nurofen plus, even when topped up with paracetamol, only took the edge off it last week on the worst day).
You must also prepare to be exhausted. Take a liquid iron supplement to build yourself up, but now is definitely the time to be very kind to yourself. Rest, watch box sets, sleep.
The hormone surge is really difficult - like birth I think it comes in about 2 or three days after the heavy bleeding. Not only does it amplify grief, it throws you into a bit of a spin (well... that's my experience, but that could be me). I was also short-fused and snappy. That's when I felt least capable of coping and most in need of a pillow to cry in. Thankfully, now a bit of an expert, DH stepped up to take care of the dc and make lots of cups of tea (although the house was an absolute tip when I finally made it down stairs...).
Take some time off work. If your rationale is that 'getting back into things quickly' will help you cope better, please have a really good think about that. It might - I'm not saying that it won't, as everyone is different. But after my first mc I went back to work too soon, and I fell apart after a few days and made a total twat of myself.
I had a really kind and gentle GP at the time (oh that they were all as she was!), who gave me some advice after I was sent home from work (for totally breaking down out of the blue... Yeah, I am giving this advice after learning the hard way...
) that I remembered following both subsequent miscarriages. She said I can't rush my grief, I needed to process my loss in my own time, and also pointed out that I would be more useful at work once I had let this happen. She told me not to think about work for a couple of weeks and prescribed long walks in the woods! I did as she suggested and found it cathartic and peaceful.
One of things I did last week was to phone the GP practice and ask for a sick cert for a couple of weeks. The GP (a different one) was very sympathetic (well, I was sobbing uncontrollably!) and was happy to do this. It was much better doing it this way (over the phone) than the last time, when I went in to the clinic and had to sit and blub everytime a pregnant woman or a newborn entered the waiting room. And now, I don't need to worry about going back to work just yet, I can focus on physical and emotional healing.
I also think that we should not feel guilty about being a little bit selfish and self-indulgent during this time. If someone else picks up the kids, or cleans the house, or whatever, that's more than ok, that's good. Buy yourself a present, treat yourself, stay in bed.
This is a completely crap thing to have to go through, and it's made even worse by the fact that hospitals, EPUs and GPs are inconsistent in their empathy and understanding of what women are going through and how they support women going through that (having women who are miscarrying wait in the same room as obviously pregnant ladies going for routine scans is just cruel) and let's not even talk about the absolute awkwardness of society in general.
So above all, give yourself a break and look after yourself. 