climb aboard this bus called i was on "dec 11, jan 12, feb 12" etc- hear me now!!

[Mama5isalive]

I thought i would just start this thread for all of us who have sadly lost our seats on our previous buses, but still want to talk and share and move on in all different areas!

Please swipe your cards, pay your fare and share!!!!!!!!
all are welcome to the journey ending in "moving on street", "TTC avenue" or "let just wait and see walk "or ", "Its finally happened for me junction"

Puzzle congratulations! I can imagine how nervous you feel, but it's a start, fingers crossed for you.

Catsy great news too, can't be long now till your 12 week scan, then hopefully you can relax a bit. (and really glad you posted here, been thinking about you).

Moomin any news on your DH? Sounds like you're having a really tough time at the moment.

Mama5 no internet would drive me mad too! We had a week without, thank goodness for my phone! How's the TTCing?

NOt much news here. DS's birthday party was great, he seemed to understand that it was a special day and all about him, and enthusiastically opened all his presents (which are now scattered everywhere, along with the rest of his toys, such a lucky boy).

Still TTCing, in the 2ww now so stopped drinking again. Been a bit half hearted again with SWI though, just wait and see I guess. Started trying nearly 7 months ago, just assumed I'd be pregnant by now (and wanted to get into this school year, so only 2 apart from DS). Then I saw something in the news about poorer academic outcomes for August birthdays and wonder if I should wait! (I think too much, I know it doesn't matter at all, would just love to have another baby).

Of course 3 months were spent being pregnant, I'm not worried, just a bit sad sometimes and feel like time is passing, age gaps growing, and no sign of anything happening, and not much chance this month. (RL friends don't understand this). My work colleague just had her baby, so cute, so happy for her but a little bit jealous.

Hi everyone

Dp is still waiting for another appointment and I'm still waiting for my appointment to come through from the hospital, I'm going to ring them tomorrow.

First af has arrived, feeling realy low at the mo. Just can't stop crying.

Moomin sorry you're feeling so low, lots of hugs. It's awful just having to wait especially when you're really anxious. Hopefully your DP having to wait for an appointment is a good sign - if they were really worried he should get an appointment within 2 weeks.

I was all over the place after my miscarriage, part of it was because I was upset but hormones probably made it worse. I've had 2 AF's (warning - the first one was very long) and feel back to normal physically now, still cry sometimes (over very little) but definitely settled down - I really hope time will help you feel a bit better. You have so much going on at the moment though, hope you and your DP are still managing to support each other through this.

Good luck with the hospital tomorrow.

Hi all - Im back!!!!internet finally ohhhhhhh it feels so good!
right big hugs to you all i missed you guys!
Moomin - trust me your feelings are so normal, i think if you didnt feel like this then something is wrong! be kind to your self and when your ready ( TTC& SWi was the last things on my mind) you can just see if it happens again for you something positive to look forwards too! trust me hold on to the good thing in your life it will help in the low, dark days!
Tumble - so glad the party went well! so your holding off the TTC for a bit or taking a more relaxed approach? wotever you decide im sure it whats right for you!
well 2 more of my friends have had there babies! and it brought it home that i would of been 32 weeks and 5 days!!!!! and would be of mat leave right now!
so feeling quite sad, low and upset that getting pregnant again has been soooooo hard!!!!!although i havent temp, charted, po-os or any thing else!
just calculating days and hoping i SWi on the right time!

sorry not feeling very strong right now!!!! just sad and weepy!!!!!

moomin - so sorry i forgot to asked how your DP is, and how did your appointment go! feeling slightly dipsy! with info i just read!!!!!!

Hello ladies, Can I join? I was on the May 2012 bus but found out on Saturday (at 11 weeks) that baby had no heartbeat. I'd had bleeding at 7 weeks so was signed up to knicker checkers anonymous early on. The 7 week scan showed a heartbeat and the bleeding stopped so our hopes were high until this weekend.

I passed pretty much everything natually on Sunday. Got to go back for a scan next week to check everything has gone but I did pass the sac so hoping I'm over the worst.

DH and I are devastated and lots of tears were shed. Now feeling stronger and wanting to try again as soon as my first AF is out of the way. Hope it's not too soon to start thinking and trying again. This was our first pregnancy and we really want to start a family so keen to start TTC asap although this might sad crazy.

Sending out positive vibes and hoping today is a better day Mama and Moomin xxx

Hi Hatti

Sorry for your loss and welcome, If you are planning on trying again there is a thread in conception that I'm on called

"Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your leathers, black nail polish, air guitar and jump in the mosh pit for some serious metalling. All welcome!"

If you would like to come and join that at some point too xx

Hi everyone.

Hatti, so sorry for your loss. I do understand you wanting to TTC again soon - I felt that way too. I do hope the worst of the physical stuff is over, and you can concentrate on healing emotionally.

Moomin, hope your DPs appointment comes through soon. I'm thinking of you, and hoping you will start to feel a bit better soon.

mama5 glad you have internet access again! Sorry you have been feeling low. I hope things turn around for you soon.

Tumble Glad the party went well. I do love the DCs birthdays - sooo cute! Hope the ttc pays off soon!

And last but most definitely not least Puzzletree!!! Yay!!!! So, so happy to hear your news. Do keep us updated.

I have my 12 week scan tomorrow. Between them, my mw and the hospital managed to mess up booking my scan (the paperwork is different in Worcs and Warks and my mw didn't know, and the hospital didn't bother to tell her!!!!). The upshot is I've booked a private scan, as otherwise I'd have had to wait till over 13 weeks, or go to the hospital with the horrid sonographer who told me I'd lost my last baby, and as I said to the mw, if I saw her again I would slap her! Am seriously feeling stressed and paranoid about, well, everything really. Actually had a panic attack over the scan booking cock up last week (I realise this is pathetic)!!!! I'm hoping all will be well tomorrow, and I'll feel better and more like I did with DD1 and DD2.... fingers crossed...

hello ladies - firstly im so sorry for your loss Hatti, we on his thread all know how a loss of a baby so wanted feels, and some like Catsy has gotten pregnant again! how your feeling is important and its for you to discuss if you want to try straight away go for it! and im sure it will work out for you
moomin - how are you doing? glad to see your still on here getting the support from others!

still here, not yet pregnant but taking it one day at a time!and feeling good about it all now! still hard would be in the finally laps but holding onto hope!!!

well im not feeling great and so just waiting for AF to turn up!
How are you all Puzzle & Catsy - praying all is well ith you and your lil beans!

namechange - was known as mama5!

Hello mama/count sorry you're feeling down, I really hope that AF doesn't show and you're unwell for other reasons?

Hatti I'm so sorry you ended up here, it's a horrible thing to go through, especially after an encouraging early scan. Take care of yourself and I hope you have a successful pregnancy very soon.

Catsy hope the scan went well??? sorry you've had such stress over the booking.

Moomin have you and dp had your appointments yet? hope you're ok.

Tumble any news???

I'm doing ok. Had a horrible scare at the weekend when I had bleeding and cramping and was certain the worst was happening again, managed to get a scan booked for tuesday where we were able to see a teeny tiny person with a heartbeat!!! And since then the nausea has hit me so I'm feeling more positive again, if a little sick.

I lost two babies, the first i think was a little girl who i called junior, and would be five this boxing day, and the only grand child dad would have ever seen, and the second i believe was a boy who i called little one who would be 3 come march 26th. It never leaves you and i do still think about them both, i was between 8 and 9 weeks with the first and 8 weeks 6 days with the second. I was scared stupid with bump, couldnt sleep the night before, and it didnt help with jane saying but your further than you were before, but i had had 2 delayed miscarriages so didnt know until my 12 week scan with either of them, but bump was absolutley fine and born really healthy after an easy (although long) labour. Sometimes, as hard as it is things just happen, and they all happen for a reason, although at the time you might not see that reason. It does get easier with time though.

Hi newly-named count, hope you are OK. Did AF show up again (old witch!)?

Puzzle, sorry to hear about your scare. I hope things have settled now. It must have been a huge relief to see the scan.

ellen, sorry to hear of your losses.

My scan went really well, nuchal scan and bloodtest gave a risk of 1 in 3290 for Downs. Saw the baby saluting / waving, which was very cute. 24 hours later, I started getting brown spotting, which freaked me out totally. So on the Monday, I had another scan at Warwick EPU, and the baby was fine. They couldn't see any reason for the slight bleed. It did continue on and off for a few days, but has totally stopped now. I also had swabs taken in case an infection had caused it, but the GP hasn't been in touch, so I imagine they didn't find anything. Starting to feel less sick now, at 14 weeks, just still having aversions to lots of foods (except all the unhealthy ones!). Really looking forward to feeling definite movements, and the next scan, as I'm starting to panic a bit again, but I guess that's just normal after a loss.

Hope everyone else is doing OK.

so nice to hear from you catsycat - glad all is going well for you and that you have had good scans!!!! yehhhhhhh!
have you joined any other threads or are you staying off here for a while!how about you puzzle are you on any threads on here sharing it all with others!
hipe you are getting loads of support and just taking it one day at a time!
keep us posted!
Ellen-sorry to here of your losses. how are you doing?

im still not pregnant but taken each day as new,have highs and lows today was low!but i hope tomo will be a high!!!!!

Hi all,

ellen sorry to hear about your miscarriages, glad you had a successful pregnancy too. Thanks for your perspective from further down the line, I can see that this is something we'll all never forget.
catsy glad all's going well and the sickness is easing, hope you get no more scares, feel the baby move soon, and just have a nice smooth ride for the rest of your pregnancy.
count sorry you're still on a rollercoaster, really hope you get a bfp soon.

I'm now 9 weeks and although I'm nervous as this was when I miscarried last time, I am feeling so sick and tired which I'm taking as a good sign (had lost symptoms before this point last time). Wishing away the weeks until a scan, no date yet but it should be around Christmas time, if only I could focus myself to use this time productively to sort out presents etc! I'm on the July 2012 antenatal thread where people are lovely, though a few ladies are having bleeds right now which is making me quite scared on their behalf :(.
Take care all, I'll try remember to pop back with updates.

Hi! Good to hear how you're all getting on. Puzzle feeling sick and tired sounds 'good'! It must be so hard waiting for a scan. If I get pregnant again I don't think I could bear waiting that long, guess I would have to go private though. A normal scan would be the best Christmas present anyway so no need to worry about the rest! (I guess your DC's may not see it that way though).
Catsy glad your scans went well. I hope the spotting has stayed away, and that you have a nice and soon to be wriggly bump!
Count Sorry that you aren't pregnant yet. Hope you're havng lots of high days and not too many lows. Do you have plans to look forward to over the holidays? I know nothing will fill the gap, with due dates coming up, but I find spending time with family (especially DS of course!) distracts me and reminds me how much there is to be happy about.
Hatti a belated hello. I hope you are recovering physically, and starting to heal emotionally as well. I understand the strong drive to be pregnant again, I felt the same. Enjoy eating blue cheese, runny eggs and drinking again while you can though - little consolation, but allowing yourself to feel 'normal' again might help, especially if you aren't lucky enough to get pregnant immediately.
Ellen thanks for sharing your experience with us, hope you are OK. Something we'll never forget, but glad you went on to have a healthy pregnancy.
Moomin any news?

As for me - not much news really. Still not pregnant (the SWI isn't quite going to plan so not much hope this month either) getting used to it though and thinking about buying some new clothes. (somehow something I don't feel I can justify while TTCing - but it's been over 7 months since we started, and even longer planning). eating lots of really nice smelly cheeses, including some brought back from a trip to Belgium. Was a really good weekend away, DS was on great form and even slept well on the ferry - it was the first time we've taken him abroad.

starting to obsess a bit about the fact I'm not pregnant though, due date getting closer and lots of bumps everywhere. Not sure how I'll take it if friends with much younger babies than DS start getting pregnant - that might be too much for me.

hi all - hope all is well!
gone quiet on her but i hope all is well with you all!

having a bit of a awful day! well we had to put in our christmas leave dates and i really want certain days off as one is my due day and i would rather not be at work! my manager said i may have to work if not enough cover!!!!!
WHHHHHHHAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTT i was so close to tears thinking this would not be an issue and i would of been on mat leave just chilling!!!!
Vent - and -Breath!!!!!!!!

Hi all, it is very quiet here, I hope that means everyone is busy preparing for Christmas, and moving on (although never forgetting our lost little ones).

Count sorry you're having a rough time, I hope you got the time off you needed, and your due date passes (or passed) calmly, and as easily as it can. Thinking of you.

Wanted to let you know that I seem to be pregnant again (about 5 weeks). I'm so pleased, but also terrified, and not feeling very 'pregnant' yet. Trying to be positive, I know there's no reason to think things won't work out. I will definitely be having an early scan (even if I have to pay). The day I found out, I heard a work colleague lost their little one at 21 weeks, so desperately sad for them.

Hello tumblebug, congratulations!!!!!! :) Hope this little one stays safe for you.

Count I hope you're ok lovely, sorry you're going to have such a tough Christmas with all the memories and sad thoughts :(

I'm 11 weeks now, heard a heartbeat at midwife appointment the other week so feeling ok, but still very anxious for the scan which is a week on wednesday. I don't think I'll relax until I can feel a baby wriggling around on a regular basis.

Hope everyone else is getting on ok, sadly there were some losses on my new pregnancy thread and I am thinking of them lots, wondering if they are reading through this thread and hoping our stories make them feel less alone and give them hope for the future.

Congratulations tumble

So I finally rang about my post natal and have been told it will be sometime in the new year

Dp is fine lumps are cysts!

We haven't started ttc yet, we will be having a talk about it tonight as the older dc's are out. We have a holiday booked in feb for my sisters 30th which we wouldn't have been able to go too as Jacob was due the week before, so didn't want to start ttc again and miss it as dc's are looking fwd to us all going now

Huge - Congratulations Tumble - what a lovely Christmas present! enjoy!
im feeling all you guys have fallen pregnant and im just still here waiting!
due date tomorrow so as you could imagine feeling really down and just thinking maybe i would of had my baby by now or labour ward now - I HATE FEELING LIKE THIS and feel so flipping stupid about it all im blessed as i have DC but the loss inside just hurts so much!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry to go on about it - need to vent it out!

Hi all, thanks for the congratulations! I can't feel happy or excited yet, such a long way to go, but the bfp is a necessary step.

count so sorry you're having a difficult time, I really hope you've had lots of love and support to help you through today. However blessed we are (and I look at my life and know how very lucky I am), the need to nurture a baby is so integral to who we are that we can't just block it out. I'm sure it will happen again for you soon. however we will never forget our losses.

moomin good news about dp. enjoy your holiday and time out from ttc.

puzzletree glad all is going well. I think I'll book a scan in a couple of weeks, so hard not knowing what 's going on. Like you, I can't imagine I'll feel relaxed for a while though.

Hi again everyone. I had my 12 week scan yesterday and everything is looking good. The baby was wriggling around and the perfect size for dates, due the day after DS2s 4th birthday :) Started to tell people now and feeling more confident, though am really looking forward to feeling some reassuring regular movements. Hope all is going well catsy with your pregnancy? And tumble how many weeks are you now? 7? Hope you're feeling ok, reassuringly ill yet?

Count I hope you got through yesterday ok. All your feelings are totally understandable, you had so much invested in the baby that didn't make it :(. I really really hope that 2012 brings happier times and a BFP for you.

And finally moomins so pleased that your DP is ok, that must be a huge relief. Hope you get your appointment soon and get a good plan of action in place, holiday in feb sounds very appealling :)

puzzle glad everything was ok with the scan. They have assured me that the appointment will come in the new year.

We have had an offer accepted on a house today! I'm realy looking fwd to a new start, and having the extra bedroom for ds3