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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

climb aboard this bus called i was on "dec 11, jan 12, feb 12" etc- hear me now!!

402 replies

Mama5isalive · 18/07/2011 23:43

I thought i would just start this thread for all of us who have sadly lost our seats on our previous buses, but still want to talk and share and move on in all different areas!

Please swipe your cards, pay your fare and share!!!!!!!!Wink
all are welcome to the journey ending in "moving on street", "TTC avenue" or "let just wait and see walk "or ", "Its finally happened for me junction"

OP posts:
natto · 30/09/2011 21:27

Oh Moominsarescary that's horrific. So so sorry to hear about what happened to you and your son Jacob. I cannot imagine what you are going through, especially so soon after it has happened. I hope you have lots of people around you for support. It sounds like you did everything you could for your baby. Was he your first? I hope you get through this weekend ok, and, if you're not back here before then, the funeral goes ok too.
I was on the feb bus too, but left a while ago now (MC'd at 9 weeks). Was just coming on the board now to feel sorry for myself as I would have been 22 weeks now, and seem to know lots of people due early next year who are just now putting lots of updates and images of their 20 week scans on facebook etc. Just goes to show you are never out of the woods and it can sadly all go wrong at any stage of pregnancy.
Anyway, really so so sorry you've ended up here, but welcome to this thread, feel free to rant/share whatever you like.

natto · 30/09/2011 22:08

oops, forgot I name changed for David Mitchell chat! I'm puzzletree by the way. Will change back now....

Moominsarescary · 01/10/2011 00:20

Thankyou, he was my 4th child, all boys. I've had problems in the past with premature rupture of membranes, ds2 at 34 weeks and ds3 at 31 weeks but have never had a problem with my cervix before. We don't know why it happened but I suffered cord prolapse with ds3 and the cord had to be pushed back through my cervix and held there while I was rushed to surgery so it's possible it was damaged then.

I've had the same consultant with my last 3 dc, he is realy good. The doctor I saw when I was admitted to hospital just told us there was nothing they could do. I was 2-3 cm dialated at the time. I saw my consultant the next day who suggested trying a stitch even though by that time I was 5-6 cm. I do wonder if it would have worked better if the first doctor had done it.

Original poster
Mama5isalive · 01/10/2011 04:06

im so very sorry to hear about you recent loss, please come and share as we have all been there.
im feeling like getting pregnant again will be my way of coping with my loss, to me its like something that was suppose to be but was cut short!
i do hope everyone else is ok.
and my feelings about having another has not changed but every month it feels like the chance are slipping further away! but im not using any charting or ov-ing stick just working it out on a ov calculator and seeing if that works, not yet but im not hitting the early day well enough!

OP posts:
philbee · 02/10/2011 19:45

Moomin - I'm so sorry. What a horrible thing to happen. I think that lots of us have 'what ifs' and that must only increase the later it gets. I hope the funeral is peaceful. Come back and talk to us if you need to.

Mama5 - we are ttcing too, and I've never done charts or anything, just tried to work it out on a calendar and then get jiggy fairly frequently over a few weeks. I feel like charting it all properly would really get me stressed and not a nice person to be around. Anyway, sitting here with a glass of wine is pretty nice this evening!

Original poster
Mama5isalive · 10/10/2011 23:14

hows everyone doing its gone very quiet on here!!!!!

OP posts:
Moominsarescary · 10/10/2011 23:40

Hi not too bad, the funeral is tomorrow so just been getting everything organised. I did have a bit of a melt down this morning but dp came home ( he'd just got to work) and I'm feeling alot better now

tumblebug · 12/10/2011 13:56

Hi, I'm doing well, been busy moving house but pretty much all done now. Mama5 have you moved yet?

Been TTCing (in a half-hearted, tired kind of way!), think I'm in the 2ww - not really sure, think I ov'd a bit earlier than my normal cycle but I don't chart or anything, just go on how I feel. Keep convincing myself I have sore breasts, but that could just be the bra I'm wearing (not enough support?).

DS missed his settling in visit at his new nursery today because he has a rash that could be chicken pox. Kind of hoping it is now, his skin isn't great (eczema) I've kept him at home before when I wasn't sure, so would be really good to get it out the way!

Moomin, how did the funeral go? I hope it wasn't too difficult. Sounds like you have a lovely supportive dp.

Hope everyone else is OK. Any more BFPs?

puzzletree · 12/10/2011 14:18

Hi All,

Hope the funeral went ok Moomin? Hugs for you.

I'm still plodding on, mid-cycle, nothing to update. Half-hearted TTC like you tumblebug. I'm trying to work out what's going on with ov sticks and nothing obvious has happened there yet. Trying to focus on other stuff anyway.

MillontheFloss · 12/10/2011 17:01

Hi all. I'm ok, have managed to put MC behind me I think. TTCing but first post ERPC AF only ended on Sunday so it won't be this weekend until I OV. Still, might as well get cracking! Hope I'll have some good news involving a BFP to report by next month but I would be very lucky to conceive straight away so am being realistic! Hoping that whole 'more fertile after an MC' thing is true!

Catsycat · 13/10/2011 16:38

Hi Everyone! Had to step away for a while as I was totally obsessing... Have just got back from my scan, and saw a heartbeat. The dates and size match up perfectly. I actually cried with relief. Obviously, we have a long way to go, but I do feel as if a lot of weight has been lifted. Hope no-one minds me posting this on here, and that you are all doing OK.

Moomin, so sorry to read about your loss - I had been thinking of you after reading about your experience on another thread, and had really hoped things would be OK. I hope the funeral was peaceful, and that you have lots of support. xx

tumblebug · 13/10/2011 22:42

Catsy that's brilliant news!

Puzzle definitely easier focusing on other things, it'll happen in the end.

Mill glad you're OK, good luck with TTCing.

I think I put a bit much emphasis on the more fertile thing, and not enough on the SWIing - reckon AF's on her way. Oh well, will put some wine in the fridge, there's always next month.

Original poster
Mama5isalive · 16/10/2011 00:24

Moomin - how are you feeling? i pray all is well with you and you can start healing!
Million - glad your moving on nicely and making more plans! thats wonderful have all crossed for you!
Catsy- Ohhh thats wonderful news im sooooooooooo happy for you! and im so glad you came back to let us know all is well with sticky bean!
Tumble-never say never loads have thought AF was coming to get a BFP instead!!!!
well moved and now just sorting through to find new homes for all our stuff! have soooo much dont understand where it all was! i swear our house before was like mary poppins bag!!!!!!!
well im currently in my 2ww but am not holding out much hope, for the moving consumed all my energy and so didnt get much swi in ohh well! will see!

take care and back soon when got my internet up!

OP posts:
tumblebug · 18/10/2011 22:18

Mama5 thanks for your optimism, unfortunately AF showed up as expected! Hope you get your BFP this month. We're also in our new house now, surrounded by stuff, nowhere to put it all and DS's birthday at the weekend, having a party, no idea how we'll fit everyone in!

Moominsarescary · 18/10/2011 22:34

Hi everyone, the funeral was ok not that I remember any of the service but everyone said it was lovely. It was realy nice that so many of our friends took time of work to come.

catsy congratulations glad everything is going well
tumble good luck with the party

Hope everyone else is ok

kellzi · 19/10/2011 19:17

me too missed the bus on the 6th October, but still going to the hospital every 48 hours for bloods, another scan tommorrow!! Dr now said ectopic and i am passing it naturally, what the bloody hell does that mean. am so pissed off that no one seems to be able to give me a straight answer x

tumblebug · 19/10/2011 21:12

Hi kellzi so sorry for your loss. Afraid I have no idea about passing ectopics. It sounds like it's been going on for ages, how confusing. Do you have someone looking after you? It takes so much out of you physically and emotionally, try to take it easy and not expect too much of yourself until you know what's going on and start to feel a bit better (it will happen). I spent a lot of time reading books while miscarrying, was all i could manage and took my mind off things a bit.

Catsycat · 19/10/2011 21:46

Hi everyone.

Moomin, I'm glad your friends came to support you, and that it went as OK as it could. I hope you are still taking good care of yourself / being taken good care of.

kellzi, that sounds so tough, you poor thing, I am sorry. I haven't experienced ep, so can't offer any specific help, but I do remember how hard all the waiting and uncertainty was with my mmc. Rest and distraction (reading, crap telly, MN) were mainly how I got through it, that and just taking each emotion as it came, and like tumble said, not expecting too much of yourself.

Tumble, sorry about AF. Hope your new house is meeting expectations. The stuff will find a home - eventually. (That's what I'm telling myself 5 years on - turns out the home for a lot of it was eBay / Freecycle!!!!!!!!). Hope the party goes well.

Mama5 again, hope the move was a good one, and good luck with the unpacking! Thinking of you in the 2ww!

Original poster
Mama5isalive · 19/10/2011 22:24

Kellzi- im so sorry for your loss, i had an ectopic in 06 and we just waited for it too pass and went for blood tests to make sure the blood count as dropping!
baby passed in a massive period bleed and that was that. be kind to yourself!
Catsy - how is everything going for you are you good? and bean?
tumble- how is the unpacking going for you, i dont believe e have so much stuff and now in a bigger place still dont know here things should go! want more of a clutter free look so using what is needed the rest can wait till i find the time to sort through! Thank God for Garage!!!
still here waiting for AF to come on weekend feeling sick but i feel like im coming down with a bad cold! blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
limited internet also so here and there is all i can do for now!

I hope everyone else is well and doing ok! take care xxx

OP posts:
Original poster
Mama5isalive · 19/10/2011 22:28

moomin - glad you had the support of good friends it help you get through!
i hope your looking after you, time goes so quickly i dont believe how far gone i should be know! makes me sad!

the news on friday about mistakes made at scans being told no heartbeat and it was wrong, no other scans being offered- didnt make me feel good at all! so many what if's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SadAngry

OP posts:
Moominsarescary · 20/10/2011 08:12

mama so sorry you are feeling this way , the what ifs and why did it happen seem like extra torment especially as noone ever seems to have any answers

kellzi I'm sorry for your loss, I have no Experiance of ectopic, hope you are ok

Well dp brought up the topic of ttc yesterday and wants to try as soon as I feel ready. I'm not so sure, I know he's thinking that when I mc last year I feel pg with ds and all went well so hopefully it could happen again but with the added problem with my cervix and needing a stitch I'm not so sure.

We also have an added problem that I think we have both been trying to forget, a few months ago dp found lumps in his testicles that the dr thinks may be cancerous, he was booked in for tests at the same time as I was loosing Jacob so cancelled them. I think were both worrying that now might be the only chance we have to ttc.

Hopefully my post natal appointment will come through soon so we can talk through our options regarding another pregnancy with the consultant

Catsycat · 25/10/2011 21:17

Oh Moomin, I'm so sorry to hear about your DP needing tests. That must be so frightening, and the last thing you need right now. I hope everything turns out to be OK.

I feel a bit bad saying it on here, and hope no-one minds, but everything is still OK with me. Feeling very sick, so quite encouraged by that, although a bit nervous this week as it was at 9 1/2 weeks last time that I started spotting, and I was 9 weeks yesterday. I am looking forward to my 12 week scan being over, and think if all goes well then, I might feel a bit more confident!

How is everyone else?

Moominsarescary · 27/10/2011 14:25

Glad everything's ok catsy

Original poster
Mama5isalive · 29/10/2011 15:28

Ohhhhh so happy for you Catsy!
Praying all is going to go good for you and hopefully will be joining you real soon!
Don't have Internet so struggling with not being on here often!
Hope everyone else is ok!

OP posts:
puzzletree · 03/11/2011 20:29

Hello everyone. Just checking back.
Kelzi sorry this is happening to you too. Take care of yourself.
Catsy so pleased all's going well for you this time, and that you're feeling sick :). When's the 12 week scan?
Moomin sorry about your worries for DP as well as the miscarriage problems. Hope all the doctors appointments and tests go well.
Mama you're such a rock for all of us, hope it's your turn very soon
tumble any news?
And finally, I have a some good news to share, it seems that I am 5 weeks pregnant! Obviously I'm pretty nervous at this early stage, but trying to enjoy the feeling of being pregnant again and really hoping this one sticks around. It would be due in early July so could potentially be born on the anniversary of the miscarriage which would be nice I think. Or two days later, on DS2s 4th birthday which I doubt he'd want to share :). Hope all those of you who are TTC, or preparing to TTC again are lucky asap.