Who decided NOT to take HRT? What is your experience?

[Agree]

Please can menopausal / post-menopausal women share their experience of deciding not to take HRT and how it's worked out for you?

I'm not sure it's for me and am dithering.

My main reason for leaning towards HRT is vanity and not wanting to age quickly

I'm well into my 60s now and didn't even consider taking HRT as my menopause just sort of happened with no symptoms at all, periods just got less and less frequent then stopped. If I'd been suffering with all the symptoms that I know can be part of menopause, then I would have considered taking HRT because I'm not against it, but I wouldn't take it as a matter of course. Menopause can be absolutely fine for some women.

Oh god - my mother was unbearable during menopause, absolutely awful. I better start on it ASAP!

@Agree you say you're leaning towards HRT for vanity and not wanting to age quickly....well you'd be delighted to know that on Christmas Eve at works friend's party when the drinks were flowing I could still pick stuff off the floor with my teeth without touching the floor, just like the 20 somethings (that was the game they were playing and I thought I can do that...), and NOT ONE PERSON all younger than me believed I wasn't in my 40s but in my (early) 60s.
I put this down to not smoking and not going in the sun without a hat for my entire life (thanks mum), and refusing to waste energy on stressing about the small stuff, rather than HRT or not.

I don’t like meddling with the biology of my body - purely my choice. No judgement to anyone that needs HRT to manage. Ofc not. I am all for women having the freedom to choose what is right for them. I didn’t use the contraceptive pill either or anything else over my life time.

If I am honest maybe you were picking up on some exasperation that I feel women are just plied with drugs from the word go. Expected to take the pill for decades, rather than sharing the responsibility for conception. I see the same response with anti depressants rather than taking the time to get to the root of the issue.

HRT feels like the latest version. We are not offered ways to reduce our hours/demands/offered practical, helpful strategies - again just given more drugs so we can keep going relentlessly until we are old.

It’s feels almost exploitative and another symptom of a dysfunctional society pushing women far too hard. Other women around the world that don’t have access to HRT manage by reducing what they do, nor are they expected to have the energy of a 20year old!! They are grandmothers and are treated as such. I am sick and tired of the never ending pressure on women to strive to do more, look young etc.

Obviously for some women HRT improves their quality of life no end and are transformative but for too many women rather than simply acknowledging they are working far too hard at this stage of life or to explore other ways to support a menopausal woman - a prescription is churned out and that’s that. It annoys me. Women on HRT have the freedom to choose what is right for them and their lives.

I took it for two months, but then couldn't get any more for a bit. I did feel better taking it but since the 6 months of stopping I've had no more periods and feel a lot better all round, so not sure it's needed for me now.

My MIL has been sadly diagnosed with stage 4 peritoneal cancer at 67, a risk factor for this is apparently long term use of hrt after menopause - she took it for a number of years after her periods stopped so that's a factor in my decision too. Should say this is a very rare cancer though.

Menopause (early) in 2009. Never took it and neither have my two sisters, cousins etc and we all feel great.

We are all fit and healthy. A key factor I believe is that none of us have gained weight and that many so called menopause symptoms can be attributed to being overweight and or obese.

It’s feels almost exploitative and another symptom of a dysfunctional society pushing women far too hard. Other women around the world that don’t have access to HRT manage by reducing what they do, nor are they expected to have the energy of a 20year old!! They are grandmothers and are treated as such. I am sick and tired of the never ending pressure on women to strive to do more, look young etc.

@Newchapterbeckons this paragraph and similar statements in an earlier post frustrate me. I actually understand what you're saying, but I take a completely different view. I don't WANT to slow down and be treated like a grandmother and I see no reason why just because my actual grandmother MAY have experienced that, I should have to (and from what I hear of her, I am confident it would have pissed her off too). I'm 47, still active, focused on my career, relatively young children, busy and happy to be so. And menopause symptoms do not help me to do and be the things I want to do and be. I'm too young to be left to sit on the couch dribbling because I'm too tired to be out and about, exercising, partying with my friends etc.

And frankly, coming from one of those countries where lots of women don't get access to HRT, I can ASSURE you that the vast bulk of them feel the same way I do. They don't want to be decrepit and sent off to the old age home. They still have plenty to offer and if they could get access to medicine that would help them to do that, they'd grab it with both hands.

If you have managed to get through menopause with little intervention, great, I think that's fantastic and like anything, I think we can all agree that given the choice we'd prefer an intervention-free approach to our health. But in the same way I was thrilled that they were able to intervene and give me an emergency c-section to ensure my baby didn't die, that I was able to take hormonal contraception to ensure I didn't get pregnant when I wasn't ready, have taken antibiotics to quickly cure a UTI rather than suffering for weeks and potentially experiencing side effects... I'll happily continue to take the HRT that is, for me, the thing that is allowing me to function and exist in a way that makes me happy.

Started taking HRT for debilitating night sweats and hairloss at 44 after extensive investigations to make sure those symptoms weren't from something more sinister. Felt like I'd failed when I picked up the prescription.

I take body identical estrogen, progesterone and testosterone. It's helped with the 2 symptoms above but also resolved the following symptoms I'd been suffering from but had not thought were perimenopause related:
Tinnitus
Dental pain
Digestive issues
Severe joint pain (particularly my neck which I'd paid hundreds for physio on and now don't have any issues).
Mood (I laugh so much more now, I used to grit my teeth pretending to find annoying people funny and now I realise they are genuinely funny, it was me who was all riled up)
Patience
Energy levels (I was a champion daily day time napper and haven't had a nap for a whole month since i started testosterone)
Vulval comfort
Nail and skin health (it's not just about cosmetic look)
Huge reduction in allergies and blood rashes have disappeared.
Anxiety
Confidence

Oh and I used to have absolutely crippling ovulation pain. That's gone now and periods are better.

Peri here. I was on hrt patches for couple of years to help sleep, flat mood, occasional sweats. It initially helped but recently my mood has been all over the place, especially on the progesterone patch and I've put a stone in weight on. I notice my appetite reduces almost immediately when I stop the patches. My mood is currently better without hrt. However a bit of brain fog, night time over heating and occasional insomnia has crept back in. Still feel better than I did on patches towards the end so will see how it goes. I'm still getting regular short heavy periods, but may reconsider hrt if this changes. Mindful eating, gentle exercise and pilates is helping. Hoping to lose the weight I put on during hrt.

I didn't RTFT although I gather OP only posted once.
I'm not vain so can't help you there.
What does it mean to you, OP, to "age quickly" ?
How would I know if I "aged quickly"?
I haven't taken HRT.

Never saw any reason to.

58, ten years into meno. No HRT but I use topical estrogen against vaginal atrophy which seems really important. It's worked well for me. My friend ten years ahead sailed through menopause with barely a symptom.

Hi, when you say it didn't work, do you mean it had no effect or there were some adverse reactions?

Oh wow I had no idea about this!

I am worried what is to become of my vagina as I'm 4 weeks post surgery had my cervix removed - honestly not sure what's going on in there and have been warned about vaginal atrophy.

Thanks for the book recommendation :)

Very good question - I'm not entirely sure! I mean to say not sure what the bodily mechanisms are and quite why HRT helps things or not.

Need to research, especially since I'm currently on an oestrogen-only HRT.

I’ve been in HRT fir 5 years both systemic patches (though tried spray as well) and progesterone from NHS plus testosterone prescribed privately and topical for vaginal atrophy

I feel far better on it possibly because I started when I was peri. I also changed my diet & started exercising which helped enormously. In my experience HRT helped with weight loss because I had the energy to exercise which I didn’t have when not on it

I slowly started to feel like shit.
Spend a year on supplements / diet / exercise
Felt like shit and worse
Went on HRT and in a WEEK was back to my old self.

If you feel crap, why would you struggle on when there's a solution?

Agree if you don't have symptoms there's less of an argument but you dont win any awards for doing it without medication.

Not sure what stage I am at, but I am 53. I haven't felt that I needed HRT or anything so far. Get night sweats and used to get hot flushes during the day but rarely have those now and no other symptoms. I am either going through an easy spell or will want help later or very lucky.

I have tried HRT briefly. It had some good effects, some not so good effects. I am currently choosing to do without it and don't plan to use it. I believe there are other things I can do towards healthy heart, mitigating risk of diabetes, etc. I won't say never, because I don't know what the future holds, but it's my preference to not use HRT if possible. I would be more likely to do it if I could just use estrogen because my bad side effects came from progesterone, but I can't forgo that since I have a uterus.

I have managed to sort out the sleep issues and sleep quite well now.

As far as aging, I don't know if HRT makes a difference. I don't have a single wrinkle, most of the women in my family don't. It is possible there is an undiagnosed connective tissue issue that causes high collagen levels, so that could explain that.

Looking at the history of women in my family who are in their 70s-90s, they seem to have done well without HRT, so I hope I can too. I'll stay open to it but it's not my preference.

Tried it and felt ill.
Now using menopace for hot flushes and redclover tablets, work v well. Migraine sufferer so can't take hrt.
Am 53 this year will see how it goes....

Am 60 and have never taken it. I live in the US and when I asked my doctor about taking it he said they don’t really recommend it here unless the menopause is affecting you badly. It has not been too bad for me apart from weight gain and some depression !

I find this comment quite insulting. "So called" menopause symptoms are so-called because they are caused by the menopause. Of course being overweight has an impact on your health. But implying that the issues discussed on this thread as due to women being overweight is just ridiculous.

I am 57, never taken any form of HRT
I had some night sweats in my late 40's. I can't remember when my last period was.
I have maintained my fitness, go to the gym 2-3 times a week, use the weight machines, treadmill & bike. I also go to yoga 3 times a week. My BMI is 19.4 (ish). I eat well (am vegetarian but have a lot of tofu, nuts pulses etc) drink moderately & think I look ok for my age. Considering a few tweakments as I am a bit vain & would like some non invasive skin lifting/tightning.
I hated having periods, it was the hormonal boob pain and bloated pmt feeling and generally feeling weird. Not having much in the way of hormones feels bloody amazing. I do worry about osteoporosis, so take calcium and vit D (when I remember)
I am not sure if HRT would have been a good choice for me.

@JadziaD 'Dribbling on a couch'.....what an appalling thing to say. I can assure you that a lot of ladies do not end up this way when they do not take HRT, including a female relative of mine who was still very spry and setting new records for her solo sailing achievements at the age of 71.

Not me but I was having a conversation with my Mum's friend about this the other night.

My Mum had a hysterectomy at 45 and was never offered HRT. She's now in her late 70s and has really struggled with osteoparosis, bone pain and mini strokes for the past 12 years and is now having fractures, including a fractured femur and has atrial fibrillation and medication resistant chronic high blood pressure.

My Mum's best friend's mother had a hysterectomy at 42 and no HRT too and all of the same health issues, I remember her being in constant pain.

Her best friend has taken HRT up until fairly recently (70s!) - despite having a far worse lifestyle than mine and her mothers she is much, much fitter. No osteoparosis or heart problems, no wrinkles at all. She drinks heavily, he diet has always been atrociously low in nutrition, she's overweight and a sun worshipper (puts baby oil on her face and bakes!). Opposite of our Mums who didn't touch alcohol, ate very healthily, maintained a slim figure, wore SPF50+ religiously etc. We think the HRT is the thing that's made the biggest difference. My auntie (Mum's sister) also has none of these problems, looks and acts 20 years younger and took HRT.

She's also stayed quite youthful in her personality (still sexually active as opposed to my Mum who stopped having sex in her 50s, and her mother who was even younger) and didn't suffer from the same depression and mood swings that our Mums did (or the marriage breakdowns which can be directly attributed to the massive mood swings and rage around menopause).

ETA Another big problem has been vaginal and urinary problems and Mum and one of her other friends who also had an early meno due to hysterectomy are very incontinent and experience a lot of infections and problems down below. Again, this was an issue for her best friends mother.

Seeing what her Mum and my Mum have been through, I'll be taking lots of precautions with regard to menopause, getting HRT being one of them.