If you could have a private chat with your ex's new girlfriend, would you tell her to run like the wind?

[nighbynight]

Just wondering. I read loads of profiles of divorced men on dating websites, and I always wonder what their exes would say about them.

(I would advise to run, but thats cos my ex is violent.)

potpourri, I am thinking about why any new men I might meet would be divorced, and am trying to imagine what their exes would say about them.

Because mine was violent, I really have little idea why other poeple divorce, and tend to imagine that its only down to addiction or violence or something similar.

since she was shagging him while I was preggers with his dd and regularlty away to visit my terminally ill father I assume she'd passed on the characer reference stage

I'd say, Mind now, you do know he prefers boys don't you?

depends which ex

ltr 1: he's a psycho save yourself!
ltr 2: try and look after him he's a bit hopeless
ltr 3: he's lovely but he has baggage like ivana trump and you can't change him

ltr 4: you arn't good enough for him! (yeh i know that ones a bit unhealthy!)

I wouldn't.

I did with an ex's new gf once and although she appeared to heed my advice, he went on to worm his way back in with her. It all fell apart eventually, unsurprisingly.

So, it was fairly ineffective, my emotional involvement was prolonged (through concern for her, she was a young and pleasant girl) which was difficult and when she showed him disinterest he immediately tried to boomerang back to me .

Hmmm. Well XP is now married to her so it's a bit late!

Mind you, she seems to think it's A-OK to make the mother of your child homeless when she's suffering from severe depression and refuse to pay maintenance so I doubt she'd listen.

I often wonder that Janos... how is it that she is still with a man that can use any dishonest trick to take whatever was left to her ex and son, even if that may get him into jail. Doesn't she see that he could treat her like that?

And then I remind myself that he only started to act like that after he met her...

Before then, we had an amicable split and he was a caring father.

It would depend on their attitude towards me and my dc.

I would absolutely LOVE to drop into conversation how exh pawned my engagement and eternity rings and his ds's wii in order to put a "sure thing" bet on and go out on the piss.

I would never go out of my way to pass on information to her. i would hope she has enough sense to work out that a cut and dried contact case doesn't last 4 years and involve fact finding hearing etc.

but she sounds awful and is rather funny with my dc's so i couldn't care less if she puts up with his shit or not.

she's such a smug cow i doubt she'd listen to me anyway. more fool her i say

My mum and friends say the same thing Mongolia!

I guess she is in denial or has somehow convinced herself that his treatment of me was justified because I was so awful to him(or something).

Also he was like this before he met her so...well, good luck to her.

Ooh I'd have a bit to say to OW. But like ninah, given that she felt it appropriate to come to my house and enjoy a day out with H and my dc's while I was at a family funeral, I don't think she's of exemplary moral character either..

She will learn it all for herself. How he's always right, how he can lie his way in and out of any situation. Sometimes I imagine him picking his nose/ears etc and eating the contents and at the thought of her enduring his revolting habits..!!