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Where have all the fit, interesting and available men gone (pt 17)

993 replies

Remotew · 18/01/2010 18:03

Has no-one beaten me to it yet?

Juicy sounding good.

WG old friend is worth seeing again.

Second not to arrange a meet up without me. Maybe down south in May.

OP posts:
whethergirl · 19/01/2010 23:16

hatesponge, Friday's are good for me although my brain can not decipher what scls stands for.

abouteve - enjoy coffee tomorrow! And talking of dodgy emails...I once didn't respond to a couple of emails this guy sent me on POF (they were just one liners anyway) so he sent me a 3rd email which read "I hope you get cancer."

whethergirl · 19/01/2010 23:18

oooohhh piratecat, hope he breaks the code!

hatesponge · 19/01/2010 23:27

piratecat - i am a match member so if you want me to email him for you I will

especially as kdks one has replied!! kdk if you see this tomorrow, one of your men has emailed back with his email addy and phone no am all excited on your behalf and feeling like a proper matchmaker now! look me up on facebook ([email protected] should allow you to find me, profile pic same as one on match) msg/add me & i'll send you his details

am glad i have some good news for someone...have just discovered the gorgeous builder has, as well as not replying to my msg on match, now deleted me as a friend on FB shitbag

wg...excellent re fridays - scl is short for sincitylover, also of this thread

piratecat · 19/01/2010 23:34

oh, hi hatesponge, what a good idea, that's very generous of you to offer.

I just started off this year really thinking, you know what i hope i meet someone this year. Havent been on match for about 2 yrs, and p o f is just the same old. The blokes prob think the same of me, i have been on there for about 3 yrs!!!

I was thinking, and correct me if i am wrong. Do you think he must have checked who'd looked at this profile, then winked. This would show he was a proper paid up member wouldn't it? As, when you are not paid up you can't see who has visited your profile.

So, if he tried to send me a message, (hopes) then that would be a good sign. before i wade in and ask you to send one for me? Or should i just go for it. omg, i am being a twit.!!

whethergirl · 19/01/2010 23:45

hatesponge - don't take it personally, who knows what goes on his life. Wasn't meant to be.

Great news for kdk! Nice work! Exciting!

hatesponge · 19/01/2010 23:46

pc - its up to you; I'd be tempted to email him so he knows you cant email back (as it seems to have worked with kdk, albeit that hers had emailed her, but she couldnt read it) however following the builder incident - which I am still a bit cross over!- I am probably not the best person to give advice...

wheres juice, shes good at this stuff!

piratecat · 20/01/2010 00:00

grr@ your builder incident. I swear i am hooked on the dating site despite experience that tells me to not bother!!

i will give it 24 hrs!!!

sparkybint · 20/01/2010 07:54

I hope it's OK to join in, I've come over from Relationships where there's a sorry tale about my latest relationship disaster.

Everyone here is so upbeat, it's a real tonic. After this one's gone tits up, don't know how long I should give it before I go back into the fray. What's the concensus on how local a guy needs to be? You lucky ones, how far away do your men live?

This latest one was over an hour's drive (and disabled so he couldn't get into my house!) and the one before that was over 3 hours! What with DD, it was crazy! So much nicer to be able to meet up without having to plan it weeks in advance and just for a quick drink or whatever.

piratecat · 20/01/2010 08:42

ikwym, internet dating is so contrived. I long for the good old days where you'd have a social life, go out, and meet someone. None of this meetingup, drives, not being able to have a drink, and basically putting a dampner on the whole sorry business.

sorry, but that's all i can advise. !!

gah. I live in a realy remote area, no proper civilisation for about 15 miles, i sometimes dream of moving to a city, as i cannot face the thought of being so cut off from the world, and being single forever!

sparkybint · 20/01/2010 08:52

Hi PC, yes it is contrived and I think if I do it again, it's got to be someone in my town or nearby (luckily I'm near London) or I won't bother. Harder for you I guess. And being single forever? Doesn't strike the fear of God into me like it used to - go and have a look at the Bring me my Slippers thread on Relationships!

DONTtouchMUMSfestiveJUICE · 20/01/2010 08:56

pirate - hi, welcome... right... you dont need to wait on this guy emailing you... he's already made first move with a wink. if he's shy he wont message until receiving a wink/message back... get one of others on here to mail him with you pof id or just your email.

since he's already winked this would be fine.

sparky - there's no harm in geting back online even just for a perve something to keep you busy at those times when your feeling abit down over next few days/weeks and avoid temptation of getting abck with your ex.

also sparky - the absolute most i would do is about 45 mins drive. and only if they would drive their fair share of times to my area. and tbh... i will only contemplate a non drive if they are pro-active at public transport and stay within 15 mins drive if i'm going to be one doing most of driving.

but to be honest i really am put off if they dont drive.

as for facebook and msn... i've dont give anyone my facebook. it's for my friends. it has embarassing photo's.. i talk very crude on it about crude things with my vulgar and childish friends....when a guy asks for it.. i tell them very clearly that i dont like them having it when they can read my status its as personal as reading private texts. no one has ever complained.

if i do for some odd reason add someone.. if i dont meet them, or change my mind. i do delete them.. not because i'm being mean. just because there's no need for them to see details of my life.

msn - i now try and avoid this like the plague.. if i do decide to msn someone. i usually explain i dont like it and delete them off after a few days. i cant stand all that will they/will they thing of seeing each other online.

dating is already difficult enough in wondering whether or not they will text/call.

if you also need to worry about whether or not they fb/msn/email.... my head would be mush.

hatesponge - nothing wrong with someone without dc. i actually find them easier. as they are free at wkds when i am... and they can come over in evenings when my dc are tucked up and hate a late dinner and watch dvd. they are much easier to fit around your life.

wg - yeah.. he's said he's handsome. but if he's meeting you hes emailing you he must think your up to his standards.

does no harm to meet up and se if he's vain or down to earth and its all bravado for the site.. you wont know... you could be shooting yourself in the foot by not meeting him... at least you wouldn't be embarassed he was a munter on your date

piratecat · 20/01/2010 09:04

hiya juice, i did wink back yesterday. There is no way of telling, tho, if he is a paid up member on match. So unless he/I fork out 70 squids for 6 motnhs there will be stalemate I guess.

DONTtouchMUMSfestiveJUICE · 20/01/2010 09:05

wow!! do they not do a single month option? or introductory thingy?

piratecat · 20/01/2010 09:11

it's crap, it is £12.99 a month for 6 months, they take the whole 70 quid out in one go. or £29.99 for one month!!!

ok who can send him a message for me, cos he is online right now!!

also how to word it.

Hiya, this is on behalf of grace who you winked at yesterday, ...

lou33 · 20/01/2010 09:13

hi pirate how are you

the mechanic lives about 40 mins from me, the one before was about an hour 40 drive, of which i did most of the travelling as it suited us better that way

mechanic comes to me though

wrt having kids or not, i dont think you should limit yourself to those who have them, i have never had a problem with the men i have dated dealing with the fact i have kids

the mechanic cant have them (when he was with his wife they did try ivf but it didnt work), and he is fabulous with my lot

and he is younger than me , so i have just argued the other side for younger childless men who live a bit of a journey away

it really depends on how well you get on i think, as to whether effort put in to see them is worth it

DONTtouchMUMSfestiveJUICE · 20/01/2010 09:13

hows every one on the SOH wagon (sitting on hands and not texting exbf for new blood)

i forwarded a joke to irish last night. to which he responded and i managed not to reply to... thats good eh? beachbum is tied up at work and i cant get a babysitter so our lunch is off. possibly rescheduled for next week. so failed miserably on that one.

ninah - your awful quiet.. and still haven't explained what happened when you fell off the wagon? have you got back together with exbf and that why?

belle - how you feeling today?

janos - picked a destination/time for your date yet?

eve - is your coffee with saleman today did you say?

my big ducks date is odd? his communication is eratic. not sure if i'll make it to sat for 2nd date without having words with him about it.

DONTtouchMUMSfestiveJUICE · 20/01/2010 09:16

pirate - i cant .i'm only on pof.

lou - morning

knew i forgot someone

scl - has the mr yorke situ improved after u talked to ur managers?

and have you arranged a meeting with exboyf or you back on wagon?

piratecat · 20/01/2010 09:17

hiya lou33. i am good. ex has gradually dipped out of our lives now, after more pissing dd about over the last 2 yrs.
changed my phone numbers, not proud of it, but had to take the pressure off, as fed up of the dramas. guess what, we havent heard owt for weeks now.

so when does hatesponge generally sign on for my email sending experiment !!

lou33 · 20/01/2010 09:20

i wish my exh would do the same, sadly he is still the same pain in the arse, just a lot closer

hi juice, i just assumed you didnt mention me as there wasnt really anything to reply to in my posts

lou33 · 20/01/2010 09:21

and would message him for you pirate, but i am not on any dating sites at all now

piratecat · 20/01/2010 09:25

cheers!

i am not expecting this calm to last for long. Dunno, he will prob reappear, with more lies. The last straw for me was him saying he really didn't think being a dad was for him, then promised dd in front of me and her he'd pick her up once a week form school, but failed ot mention it again. that was sept. I had forced dd to speak to him on the phone cos i could stand it anymore, the stalemate. Yet he was still not 'getting' how he could poss inthe wrong. It's 5 yrs now i have done my best!! Dd knows i have done my best.

How close is close (locationwise) lou?

DONTtouchMUMSfestiveJUICE · 20/01/2010 09:26

lou - not in particular. you seem blissfully loved up like asbm and monty and passglas

lou33 · 20/01/2010 09:32

i think i am juice

pirate that sounds like my exh too

he is 6 miles away now ffs

whethergirl · 20/01/2010 09:33

Morning all...thanks juicy, will meet up with Handsome methinks. I don't agree with nothing to lose by meeting up for a date tho - I mean not that I have high expectations every time but you do get psyched up and nervous/excited, plus all that make up and tube fare and organising babysitting (luckily I don't pay for that).

Juicy what do you mean by communication is eratic exactly? Does he go quiet on you?

lou33 · 20/01/2010 09:36

i guess if you get nervous before a date then yes it can be big deal

i've never felt like that though , not sure why , maybe i am an oddity