Do I leave my housing association property?

[BeauticianNotMagician]

Hi I am having many problems with my Ex.Have had an injunction served on him and now following an incident last week my solicitor and the police say they will support me as i requested a move.

I dont want to stay in the same area as ex and the only other place i have family is london.So do I give up my housing association property and try to get the rent deposit from the council to privately rent in london(the social housing waiting list is roughly twelve years).Im scared of going into private rental.But at the same time this could be the fresh start me and the kids need.

I dont know your situation but I would first try and get a mutual exchange. Is there anywhere else you would like to live? Near friends etc.

I would advise no.

If you need to move because you and the dc's are at risk from ex-p, if you have a HA tenancy you have other alternatives like finding someone to exchage with. If you need to move out of the area your HA should be able to help you with this request to.

HA and council tenancies are like gold dust these days - try to keep hold of it if you can. There are likely to be some organisations in your area who can support you in getting your HA to help you.

Good luck.

I think i will wait forever for an exchange that is the problem.Especially as i only have a two bed flat.I need to get out as soon as possible as i fear ex is never going to leave me alone.Thanks for your quick responses.

The thing with a mutual exchange is that you have to do the leg work yourself. You need to register and then look regularly for people who want to swap with you.

I knew someone who used to post flyers around areas where he wanted to exchage - it always worked for him.

Have you looked on the exchange websites - loads here?

You might find it faster than you think as people quite often want to leave London. Where (ish) are you now, is it 'nice'?

worth trying mutual exchange like millie said.

There may be someone willing to exchange who also needs to move away like you do.

And no, don't give up the HA tenancy unless you have to, I private rent and it is so insecure.

Also do you really want to be at the mercy of a private landlord who could give notice at anytime or up rent with little notice.

I live in bedfordshire and not the nicest of areas.I have been on the exchange list since i moved here and do look on it regulary.I do understand what everyone is saying though.It is such a difficult situation.

I think your best bet is to approach the HA/local council and make a request for rehousing. If you have the support of the police they must take it seriously and are likely to be legally obliged to rehouse you.

There used to a scheme where the council can refer/nominate you to another area for housing there - I forget the name but I was once rehoused under it (many years ago though so it may have changed).

You can apply direct to the area you want to move to, waiting lists may be 12 years but you may have a case to make to be accepted as homeless as it no longer safe for you to remain in your home. In that case you do not go on the waiting list as you have priority over it.

I'd go to Shelter for specialist advice, they will help you approach (and probably fight) the council.

Homelessness due to violence or abuse

Be prepared for the council to be obstructive though. Know your rights and get as much back up and evidence as you can.

Thank you to everyone for your advice.

AnarchyAunt that link is very helpful.

I am going to get on the phone to my local council tomorrow to talk through options.Right now i dont think im actually that bothered what the solution is whether it be hostel or private i just want to get away.I just have a niggling doubt about giving up my accomadation.

Good luck with it.

Try to exhaust every possibility before you give up the security of a HA tenancy.

I would really advise speaking to Shelter on their freephone helpline (0808 800 4444 - free from mobiles as well) before the council. They may well advise you to make a homeless application in which case be prepared for the council/s you apply to to obstruct you all the way. They will do anything to avoid taking on the duty of care that homelessness entails (can you tell I have recent experience of this?).

Be aware that local council staff practise whats known as 'gatekeeping' - essentially this is refusing to take homeless applications from anyone not sleeping on the streets, in order to keep the official numbers of homeless people low and avoid their statutory duty towards them. This is unlawful - if they refuse you an application and face-to-face interview, make a Big Fuss.

Am in a HA in beds also. People do seem to want to re locate here!! How about a different part of beds?

don't give up HA property seriously - you will regret it ever more

Get harder on the police/solicitors etc to get that arse off your case -make hiom move not you - why should you have to give up security and your kids try and start again somewhere else just cos he is a twunt?

I am thinking about my kids i feel that it could be the fresh start we all need.I dont have much to stay in this horrible town for.

I am going to wait until all my evidence comes back from the police and then take it all to the council and see what they suggest.Over the phone they said that from what they can see it will probably involve me going back on the homeless list(had nowhere to live when pregnant with ds1) and into temporary accomadation.

My friend was in a homeless place with dv connections. This was in Bedford. She got a new place with BPHA within 8 weeks. It was an all women hostel but was a Nice clean place!
Is that an option?

Yes thats another option.Im in the place with the airport.Sorry just in case ex has a search.

I think like AnarchyAunt said its just a case of pushing the council.I guess a lot of it will be who i get on the day.Thats why im gathering all my evidence before i approach them as then im hoping things will move along quickly.

BNM - I am so rooting for you - this must be a horrible situation. If you can get a transfer out of town and you think this is the best option for you and the kids then go for it and don't let the council fob you off.

My ex neighbours came to my area from over 7 hours away! SO there are councils out there that will take you on and help you out. You could go anywhere in the country - London is so easy to access you'd always be able to see your family when you needed.

A hostel that is just women could be just what you need - he can't get near you there can he?

Thank you thesilverlining.
My ex approached me on my way to nursery this morning when i was taking the boys to nursery he screamed at me calling me an evil cow among other things.I wont let him make me think im the one with the problem anymore.I called the police and they said despite the fact i have an injunction unless he actually harms me not a lot they can do.Its not fair mental abuse is just as bad.I cant take much more it makes me think now more than ever that i must leave the area completely as he knows where work,ds's nursery,ds1 new school and where all my family live here so it will always be easy for him to track me down.

Totally agree about underestimating the numbers of people wanting aplace outside of London as I used to work for a London authority Housing Dept at one time. Everyone was deperate to get out to be nearer family etc, but I suppose it depends on where you live! Please give it a go, it's good advice, you might be surprised.

Just read about where you are located. Think you should try! There are quite a lot of people would like to get to the area you are in, or there were when I was there. Good luck.