where have all the fit and interesting available men gone?Part 3...

[aseriouslyblondemoment]

Elm thought you'd like that

i prefer old fashionned ways of text/phone.

i like msn alot
but in this instance am trying to tread carefully

msn is a bit stalker like for me sometimes?? all that hiding from people and them hiding from you??

oh yes agree with you there!

just popped in over lunch !! ASBM is this the exbf that you let go and regretted it?

how regular is his contact just now?

oh hi SCL!yes he is!
whats your news?

hi SCL - so update on samename 2??

RJ its been a few texts thru out the week
as i say its moving slowly

I would say that this sounds very good news indeed.
Tho good for taking it slowly - have you arranged to meet (sorry if you've already said).

No news here but after the rather exciting start to the week I think that's not necessarily a bad thing.

samename2 did text yesterday morning - I didn't reply immediately because I was asleep!! But did reply later in a positive manner.

I will be disappointed if we don't meet again but I do also know he can be a bit erratic in his contact.

SCL - was that your first meet with samename2#?? - if so... i think his contact will be regular now. as it was probably erratic as wan't sure as hadn't met yet.

asbm - slow is good to begin with to build the bridges again. daily bombardment from either side would be too much.

yes it was first meeting - it's hard to explain before (over last six months)the contact has been regular but not in a fixed pattern - ie not each morning or evening but fairly regulalry nonetheless.

Who knows - he has only texted twice since then. But did talk about another meeting. But generally alot more talkative in rl compared with online/text.

some men are like that. they see phones as a means of communication for making arrangments. not for long chats or text chats as they prefer to do it in RL.

if he has agreed another meeting then he will be at another meeting.

i think it would be unrealistic to expect anymore from him in the way of text/phone convo...as it's not for him.

why not work out when your free and arrange to meet him. with a fella who's not great with phones i would call too.. rather than text.

RJ yes i agree
tho i am v.hormonal atm so wish he would make more just to cheer me up!
phone convo helped me a great deal tho
and has made me realise that we both need to go slow

RJ you're getting good at this dating advice now!
i think all our girly dilemmas on here help us all out lots

thing is don't think I am free (on a weekend) until end March. If only my exh would take DS1 to football, it would help.

Not overkeen on going out on a week night.

In fact, when I think about it have coaxed him a bit all along. (sounds like a cat!! lol) - he hasn't seemed to be put off by that.

i have 2 brothers who used to be great for learning off.

one hated phones with a passion. would forget it,loose it, break it. anything to avoid it. could talk for britain in RL, but had a real issues with phones. and it used to drive him mad if he'd agreed to see a woman at some point and she kept pestering him via text/mobile to baically confirm they were still on or reassure hemselves that he was interested and going to show.

his attitude was

"if i say i'm gonna be there, then i will. i will contact YOU if i wont"

the other brother will be in constant contact with his women.

but his attitude was

"if i didn't call to confirm then i wasn't going"

which doesn't really help in your answer behind how to treat a new fella.

but does help to understand that level of contact is not important in early days. what is important is if they actually turn up to the dates

SCL - just go out through the week. this week. go on....do it.

SCL i can imagine that you are a very persuasive lady lol.

If I want something I can be lol.

If I go out in week I have to get babysitter. ExH sees DCs one night a week but he really makes such an issue about staying beyond 7ish it's not worth it.

A rather funny aside - I gave DCs a spare phone when they went to exH last week and when I next saw exH - he said you need to be careful what you put on your mobile, the kids can see it etc etc. OK I said what's on there? Photos and texts he said in his usual pompous manner.

Had a look really nothing to get excited about at all, all above board however I did have a chuckle because the photos were of two very fit, good looking younger guys, who I have talked to online. Tee hee!!

texts were very bland tho one from exbf saying how someone felt.

If I want something I can be lol.

If I go out in week I have to get babysitter. ExH sees DCs one night a week but he really makes such an issue about staying beyond 7ish it's not worth it.

A rather funny aside - I gave DCs a spare phone when they went to exH last week and when I next saw exH - he said you need to be careful what you put on your mobile, the kids can see it etc etc. OK I said what's on there? Photos and texts he said in his usual pompous manner.

Had a look really nothing to get excited about at all, all above board however I did have a chuckle because the photos were of two very fit, good looking younger guys, who I have talked to online. Tee hee!!

texts were very bland tho one from exbf saying how someone felt.

get a sitter and go out then.....or can you not meet during the day?

lol at sincity's ex! good job photo wasn't of Rhino Man
I'm a bit blunt with texts, too and last time I dated I didn't have a mobile so chatting by text makes me a bit impatient, tho I'm getting better
nm has sent me a couple that made me blush (not crude, but a bit oo-er for me) was nice suprise but never sure what to say to reciprocate as not quite my style
hate confirming and reconfirming arrangements with a passion
maybe I should have been a gay man

i dont really confirm and reaffirm dates. if i'm going to be there i will. dont mind someone having contact and chatting or texting inbetween. but dont ask in every second text "are we still meeting"

or i may be liable to saying "no bugger off"

The irony re exh is that he was the one who felt hemmed in by marriage, we were a burden etc was always one for the ladies etc and has gone on very quickly to get in a settled relationship and also had more DCs (never on his agenda to have any)

Whilst I am free, independent and quite enjoying the attention.