By ridingjoker on Fri 20-Feb-09 21:55:54
n1 - "trust you", your such a sensitive soul i think. does it really bother you when you offend people?must you make things up??
I'm guessing you don't like to go to bed on an argument. you insist on talking things through before you can sleep soundly?
Sensitive. Yes, I can be, though I selectively choose who gathers sensitive treatment.
It does bother me if I offend people, however, offense to another person might not feel like offense to me if I were trying to put myself in their shoes.
The "make things up" point can be read in more than one way.... From a "kiss and make up" point of view or the "imagination running wild" point of view... which would have it be?
I would prefer not to go to bed on an argument - yes. I would prefer to not have an argument or find a resolve long before bed if I can. Everything is calmer that way.
If the argument is that serious that it needs some thought, sleeping on something does help to find a solution. It's not always the best idea.
I don't insist on talking things through before bed - or at any time. I might have that as a preference but I can only talk for me. If the other (or significant other) doesn't want to talk, then sometimes it's better to let things rest for a bit and revisit a bit later.
I would want to inject an "it depends" point at this juncture. It is the case that some people choose to not talk because they want the silence and lack of communication to (in some way) punish the insensitive person and in the hope that the insensitive person realizes their insensitivity. I think that realistically, the lesson won't be realized.