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Lone parents

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Original poster

Sorry if this has been done to death......but can we go round the group and introduce ourselves (please?)

108 replies

curlygal · 20/01/2009 18:57

Hello

There seems to be a good group of single parents around at the moment so I was wondering if we could all say hello and state our business so that I can try and keep track of who's who?

I only recently got internet at home so I am sure that I will be contributing (and occassionally ranting) more often so I'd like to formally introduce myself, well here goes....

I'm curlygal, I'm 35 and I live in Edinburgh with DS who is three. I work part time yet am still constantly exhausted. Most of my friends are married and the few single ones I have don;t have children so I feel pretty isolated and as if I am the only single parent in Edinburgh sometimes! Add to that the fact that my Ex is "challenging" to say the least and I could really use some support from like minded single parents, so please step up and say hello

If no one answers this thread I will actually cry as have had the day from hell (but please don;t let my intense neediness influence you

OP posts:
beansmum · 20/01/2009 19:08

Hello

I'm a single parent in Edinburgh, so you're not the only one. I am moving to NZ in 2 weeks though (11 days actually, I'm not ready!).

ds is 4.6
ds's dad is a bit of an idiot, or he was last time I saw him which was when ds was 6wks old.
I don't work. I'm starting uni in NZ next month and hope to graduate in 5 yrs (double degree, LLB and BA in English), then work and get rich and buy a house and a dog.
That's it really.

ChasingSquirrels · 20/01/2009 19:08

Hi curlygal, our business? lol

I'm CS or Squirrels, I'm 36 and have ds1 (6y) and ds2 (3 next week).
I am an accountant and work in practice, doing 4 short days a week.

I split up from ex last Mar when he announced after 16 years together that he couldn't carry on in the relationship any more. I was, to put it mildly, gobsmacked! Ex isn't challenging though.
He has the ds's one weeknight and a 24 hour period at the weekend.

My (small group of) friends are also married with kids - but they are fantastic, as are the mums at school - many of whom have offered support over the last year.
Not to mention my parents, who live nearby and help alot with the children, and who I love and appreciate dearly.

I hid it a hole (metaphorically speaking) last year, but I am feeling like I might be ready to start crawling out of it now.

Tidgypuds · 20/01/2009 19:09

Hi curlygal, lovely to meet you.

Tidgypuds here, im 32 in live in Lancashire. I have a Ds who is 7 and a DD who is 4.
I am self employed and try to work part time

Life is challenging to say the least and I have a constant feeling that im not doing something I should.....I think they call it guilt, desite busting a gut to do as much as I can.

I love being a mum desite being on my own.
Sorry to hear you have had a day from hell, I fine red wine helps in these circumstances!

skramble · 20/01/2009 19:10

Hi

I have been single now for over a year, I have 2 kids DD 9 and DS 12, I am 30+. I now have a NM/ DP. I live up in the wilds of Scotland and NM lives an hour away.
ExH is a bit crappy about seeing the kids, he does see them regular but it always seems limited. He has never contributed much to their lives really.
I work part time, fairly flexable job and a great MIL make this possible. I am also studying for a Foundation Degree by distance learning.
I am very limited in the way of freinds, mostly mums I know through my kids, so more of an occasional cuppa thing than anything very close or suportive. Few freinds at work I suppose.
Main aim this year is to do some voluntary work to get enough experience to get a proper job, now that my kids are getting older and my overdraught getting bigger .

Original poster
curlygal · 20/01/2009 19:14

Thanks for replying to me! I won;t cry after all.

Sadly I have no wine otherwise I would definitely be drowning my sorrows.

Hi Beansmum fellow Edinburgh single mum! What a shame you are leaving the country. YOur plans sound fab - how did you decide to do that? (can I come with you?)

Glad you are feeling more positive CS

Most of the time I love being a single parent - it certainly beats life with my Ex anyway, but some days like today when work is non stop, DS is ill and Ex is acting like the biggest Ralph in the world I just want to crawl under my covers and cry.

OP posts:
TequilaMockinBird · 20/01/2009 19:17

Hi

I'm TMB, have 1 DD (11) and live in the North East. I left my abusive XP (DD's dad) about 4 years ago now yet he's still an utter twunt!

I work full time and don't really have much support from family unfortunately.

Occassionally post rants on here about XP or DD but mainly lurk

Original poster
curlygal · 20/01/2009 19:26

Twunt is such a good word to describe ex's - that is axactly that I was muttering about Ex this afternoon.

Feel free to rant - it's better to get it off your chest. I can feel one about my Ex coming on

OP posts:
FAQtothefuture · 20/01/2009 19:28

Hi, I'm FAQ, I have 3 DS's (8,5 and 19 months) live in Wellingborough.

JollyPirate · 20/01/2009 19:32

Hello all, I'm JP and have been a single parent since last year. I'm 43 (on the 3rd Feb) and work part time as a health visitor which has to be the best job I've ever had.

I live in Essex and am fortunate enough to have really good family here who offer lots of support.

I am luckily on fairly good terms with my ex-H and he stays here regularly to spend time with our DS - this weekend we are all off to Colchester Zoo.

I am trying to get fit this year and I have about 5 stones to lose so started following the WeightWatchers programme yesterday - so far so good.

Tortoise · 20/01/2009 19:40

Hello.
I am Tortoise. I have DS1 11, DS2 9, DD1 5 and DD2 4. We live in Somerset.
DS's Dad XP1 is also a twunt! But he does see the boys every tuesday night and friday night til saturday night.

DD's XP2 was abusive. He hit my DS1. Emotionally abusive to the rest of us. He has approx once a month contact supervised by an assistant social worker.

Most of the time i cope fine but am finding more and more lately that i don't want to be on my own anymore!

Oh and my parents and brother moved to turkey 3 yrs ago so i don't have any family to help me at all but there is a lovely lady/CM who lives a few doors away who helps out if i need her to.

kyrasmummy · 20/01/2009 19:56

Hi,

More then a lurker then a poster, i have DD who's 4.5 and DS who's 3.2.

Found out today the ex has meant somebody else, though i knew it would happen but feel shite, he hasn't had the kids since September and i'm a bit miffed that he can go out and get on with his life and i can't... Oh yes she's 16 and he's 29 which i feel really strange/not happy about.

MeNmyGirl · 20/01/2009 19:58

Hello
Im Sarah, im 25 and live in London, i have one beautiful DD whos 4 1/2. Iv been a single parent for 2 and half years now,..dd doesnt see her dad which suits us fine as he was a complete c*!!
I dont work at the mo but DD's just started full time at reception so im going to start studying before returning to work. x

Pinkchampagne · 20/01/2009 20:07

Hello,
I am PC, I am 36 & have 2 DS's age 9 & 5. I separated from my ex 2.5 years ago, but didn't move into my own place until nearly a year later. Will have been here 2 years in May.
My boys see a lot of their dad. He works shifts so there isn't a regular pattern, but they normally see him several times a week, which they look forward to. I also have a lovely DP now, who I have been with for 17 months. We are both just starting the divorce process.

BeauticianNotMagician · 20/01/2009 20:15

Hi,

I have ds1 4 and ds2 2.7years old.I am 28 tomorrow.

I left my abusive ex a year and a half ago.He is still a gambler and doesnt bother much with the boys.All he is interested in is getting back with me but it is not going to happen.

I work part time and i dont get much of a social life as family arent that much help and my ex will never have the boys for any more than an hour.

macdoodle · 20/01/2009 20:18

Nice thread am mostly lurker on here !
Mac here, 37, 2DD's (7 and 1), part time GP, very long sordid tale (OW, pregnant OW, abusive ex)soon to be divorced....

tigerlili · 20/01/2009 20:28

Kyrasmummy
Erm that is child abuse on your ex's part or at least sexual exploitation. Legally not an adult till 18!Even if consensual VERY suspicoous!

sorry i work in the field of cp! erm am 37 with a fab hormone filled 10yrold! Ds who told me last week (on my birthday) my ex's girlfriend is the woman who he was thinking of having an affair with !His teaching assistant! They have been together since i kicked him out!

I am usually lurker too, (((((((((((curlygal)))))))))))))))))

retiredgoth2 · 20/01/2009 20:37

...I confess to being in possession of a 'Y' chromosone. However I am most assuredly a lone parent since Mrs Goth snuffed it in 2006.

...43 soon (and those years, they have not been kind) parent to a large number of urchins. Well, four. The Geeky Urchin is 11 (and has Asperger's), The Feral Urchin is 9, and the Monozygotic urchins are 7...

I'm a nurse (with a bizarre term time only contract that is a model of enlightened employment policy). We live in a suburb of Bristol, that I pretend is Bath because that sounds a bit posher.

...I tend to post on the Geeky and Music threads, largely extolling the virtues of Mac computers and superannuated 80s Indie bands.

Yep. I'm that dull.....

ChasingSquirrels · 20/01/2009 20:39

don't know about dull RG, certainly funny. Like your posts.
Interesting to read this thread, some names I recognise but didn't know were LP's.

Tortoise · 20/01/2009 20:42

Lol RG! Good post!

macdoodle · 20/01/2009 20:46

yup RG you are funny, your profile is too 4 boys OMG!!!!

muggglewump · 20/01/2009 20:51

Hi.
I don't post that much but I am Mum to 7yr old DD, been a single Mum since she was 6 weeks, and I live near Glasgow.
I am from Durham originally but have lkived in Bristol and Australia and travelled in SE Asia a bit. DD is half English, Half Australian, born in Scotland and I gave her an Irish name
Oh and I'm 31.

brightwell · 20/01/2009 21:02

I'm over 40 & Mum to dd 14 & ds 11, I'm a nurse. I'm always a bit hazy about certain facts as I know my ex's woman uses this site. I've been a lone parent for 10 years and wouldn't have it any other way.

kyrasmummy · 20/01/2009 21:02

tigerlili, i feel sick about it tbh. He was meant to be having them this weekend but i've said no now, i don't feel right sending them there when he's seeing a child, of course now being threatened with court.. ect.
Makes me sooo mad

ANTagony · 20/01/2009 21:17

I'm 34 have 2DS 2 and 5. My ex is a parenting author loves talking about what a good dad he is. My tongue is a lot shorter than it used to be for biting it so hard. He left when the boys were 1 and 3. We're in North Wales but are selling up to clear our debts and move closer to family in the North West.

I qualified as a Mechanical Engineer but now run my own web based business - but its early days.

Remotew · 20/01/2009 21:24

I'm 47 so one of the oldies that post on here but mostly lurk. Single mum to one DD 14.6. Work 4 days a week between 2 part-time jobs in finance, just started a new job this week. I live in the North of England and have managed to go 11 days without a cigarette.