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Original poster

Anyone fancy a chat about dating sites?

75 replies

used2bthin · 27/11/2008 13:33

I have been on two for a while but only just got chatting with people really and I find it so stressful! Its fun but I am terrified of being asked on a date because its been so long. Also have totally lost it (if I ever had it) with talking to potential dates. I really enjoy my life taking DD to groups, seeing friends and their kids, takng DD out with my parents etc etc but I realsie it must sound really dull to men and not much to keep the conversation going beyond the initial bit. Argh help!

OP posts:
lou33 · 01/12/2008 16:23

lol

if you see me on msn later message me, and we can catch up

mrsmortenharket · 02/12/2008 15:45

pfft. a timewaster after one thing. at least i realised now

christmaseve · 02/12/2008 15:49

Sorry to hear that. At least you haven't wasted any time on him. There seems to be a lot of timewasters going by these threads. Just have to keep an open mind, I suppose.

(Was does pfft stand for?)

mrsmortenharket · 02/12/2008 15:56

it's a half-hearted raspberry

christmaseve · 02/12/2008 16:13

Thanks

moosh · 02/12/2008 20:18

I am tempted to go on dating sites. Tried the Speed dating thing and have a really close bond with someone from there but we are just mates.
Went on a dating site the other day, just to browse and found that a guy had super imposed his head onto a different body.
I shouldn't have laughed but to say I was crying with laughter was an under statement !!!!!
But if I continue to be on my own for a long while, I might bite the bullet and have a go and join one.

lou33 · 02/12/2008 20:38

i have actually made some really good friends from online dating, so its not all a bad thing

Original poster
used2bthin · 02/12/2008 21:13

sorry to hear that mrsmorton, its so disheartening isnt it? Moosh some sites are definately better than others! My friend is on one that seems to be more about one night stands or dirty texts, she's having a whale of a time but not what I'm after!

Lou I would've been happy to just be friends with the one I was talking to, what a shame he just stopped. He keeps viewing my profile though, whats that all about?

OP posts:
lou33 · 02/12/2008 22:08

he is a nob?

Original poster
used2bthin · 02/12/2008 22:29

Lol yes its a safe enough bet!

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lou33 · 02/12/2008 22:31

we should start our own dating site

Original poster
used2bthin · 02/12/2008 22:33

what would we call it?

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Original poster
used2bthin · 02/12/2008 22:36

I'm still trying to think of a witty name...

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lou33 · 02/12/2008 23:01

all mine would involve swear words

wintercitylover · 03/12/2008 10:46

'Tossers aren't us' Lol

still puzzling over why someone would say

'was just thinking about how much I can't wait to see you for lunch. You seem so nice and I am glad I think I finally met someone really nice' plus loads of other stuff. Why would anyone say that for fun??? And to multiple people.

I did at the time think it was OTT - I would never say anything like that to a guy so soon.

Anyway took myself off to bed early last night after a long hot bath.

lou33 · 03/12/2008 10:54

i got a proposal of marriage for the first message from one guy

who know what goes on in their brains

wintercitylover · 03/12/2008 11:07

also decided I need a weekend out of Londo either with or without DCs - think I am losing my perspective on things.

Original poster
used2bthin · 03/12/2008 12:35

at proposal Lou! I have totally lost my perspective on things, I laughed a month ago when XP said be careful on there (dating site-he's on same one )he said its upsetting when you can see someone is online they've just chosen not to bother with you anymore. I said well I don't think I would take it so seriously if I hadn't even met them, little did I know!

I had one send me a list of why we were compatible taken straight from the sites matching facility and seemed to think that meant I had to agree to be together. Scary!

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lou33 · 03/12/2008 14:14

best to just ignore the loons i reckon

bluejelly · 03/12/2008 22:46

I think the trick is to have as many men on the go at once as you can handle, eg swapping emails with 3 or 4 ( or more if you can cope!)
Then if one stops emailing ( and in my experience they do, quite randomly) then you just think 'oh well, there'll be another along soon' rather than putting all your eggs in one basket and getting gutted when things don't work out.

I have learnt this after 6 months of online dating, I had it all wrong at first!

lou33 · 04/12/2008 09:01

yes, i think it is better to be chatting in general to a few and see who you click with, rather than pinning all your hopes on one person

Original poster
used2bthin · 04/12/2008 14:25

Yes you are so right. I stupidly stopped emailing one man when I thought it was going to be a possible with the other. So I did the same as him really! No one remotely interesting has answered my winks or got in touch since so I am taking a break from it for a week or so I think.

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wintercitylover · 04/12/2008 16:00

Yes I have done that too, quite blatantly. So maybe we are all - men and women just doing the same thing.

Difference is that they are not analysing it on a forum like this. LOL

I did once read somewhere that men are much more used to rejection than women. And they get over it much more quickly.

Perhaps that also explains the sweet shop approach.

lou33 · 05/12/2008 09:05

I do think a lot of people take the online dating rejection thing a bit too personally

it can be easy to forget you dont actually know them, so there is no obligation to either party regarding commuication

Original poster
used2bthin · 05/12/2008 12:51

Yes you are right Lou I am one of them And its all part of it that they talk to others too not just emailing one person. I am over my "heartbreak" now which took all of five mins pmsl! Onto the next one! Except no one else on my site seems to want to talk to me hence my little break.

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